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AIBU?

To think we're fucked!

73 replies

justabigmess · 04/04/2016 16:24

I honestly dont know what to do or where to turn.

Basically my DH is getting sacked its been completey fabricated as the new manager wants his own staff in.

We have two DD and no savings (stupid but never have enough money left to save!) wont be able to claim jsa or working tax because i dont work enough hours, no family to help.

Weve been in this position before but managed to win a payout which helped to pay our basic bills but couldnt cover our debts then so weve been paying them on sort of dmp ever since. This time i doubt we can win anything without a big fight which we cant afford (not in a union).

This year was meant to be our year to clear everything up and now were going back to square one. Were in a rented house and i honestly cant see how were going to recover this time.

We havent got the fight in us again and this will destroy DHs career its completely breaking him and i feel so helpless and utterly pissed off after two years of giving it his all its made him worse off.

Dont know whats the point anymore!

Dont really know why i have posted here hoping someone will come along and tell me it will be ok Sad

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CreepingDogFart · 04/04/2016 16:26

This can't be allowed to happen with your DH so he needs to get advice and if he isn't in a union could he speak to CAB?

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0phelia · 04/04/2016 16:27

Can't your DH start applying for a new similar job during the notice period? You need to get yourselves both to the DWP there will be help if he was employed but dismissed.

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Imnotaslimjim · 04/04/2016 16:28

First off, if you're not working many hours, why can't he claim JSA? Is it because he's been sacked? Sign on anyway, protect his NI stamp and once the restriction is lifted you're already in the system

If you're not working much, you'll be able to claim council tax rebate, and help with the rent if you don't have a mortgage

Try //entitledto.com it'll give you an idea of what you can claim

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TheSunHasGotItsHatOn · 04/04/2016 16:29

Your dh will be able to claim contribution based jsa even if you are working over 16 hours a week as long as he has been in employment for the last 52 weeks, if you work under 16hours he can add you to the claim. You can claim child tax credits and housing benefit and council tax support they will reduce the full award slightly deoending on your income.

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specialsubject · 04/04/2016 16:30

..and contact your landlord before the next rent payment is due. Communication is everything here. If you are long-term decent tenants then he will want to work to keep you.

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leelu66 · 04/04/2016 16:35

Can you DH write a complaint to his HR?

The employers don't need to know that you can't afford a big fight.

I hope things work out soon. This too shall pass. Flowers

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MaidOfStars · 04/04/2016 16:38

Does he have any evidence/paper trail/witnesses/etc that the claim against him is a lie?

Why on earth would he take this lying down? I wouldn't lose my job, let alone my career over a made up allegation.

What do HR say?

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justabigmess · 04/04/2016 16:42

Sorry dont mean to drip feed my heads all over.

He cant claim jsa because he will be sacked, cant claim working tax because i dont work enough hours and im unsure about child tax because we owe them due to a supposed overpayment which i havent got round to appealing because i didnt think it mattered as they are taking back the over payment and we didnt really need the £8 or whatever it was a week. Obviously matters now argh!

I really suffer with head in the sand issues and just struggle to face things like this and tackle them.

Will apply for hb and ctax not going to help much. We spoke to acas and tbh they werent very helpful just said just see how it plays out and come back but we cant afford to fight them anyway so whats the point.

There trying to get him on performance issues which is bull and hard to prove either way!

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justabigmess · 04/04/2016 16:43

All his colleagues have said how wrong it is and know hes bloody good but darent speak up for fear off losing their job.

I dont think he will sit back i just cant face the shit storm heading our way.

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LineyReborn · 04/04/2016 16:46

Apply for everything anyway, as outlined above by pp. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

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ExConstance · 04/04/2016 16:46

People can't just be sacked without disciplinary procedures, unless they are new employees - why has he lost his job?

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LineyReborn · 04/04/2016 16:47

And he may as well stick a grievance in about being unfairly dismissed.

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BitchPeas · 04/04/2016 16:48

How long has he worked there?

Give ACAS a call, they are good

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ilovesooty · 04/04/2016 16:50

They have already contacted ACAS.

Was he not put on a performance management plan prior to this?

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TheoriginalLEM · 04/04/2016 16:50

A few things - you may well be entitled to child tax credits, also if you are paying back the over payment just now, even if you aren't entitled to claim you may well be able to put a hold on the repyaments.

How will this affect your DH's ability to get further employment? I would take advice on this asap if you haven't already. If your DH is likely to be facing a period of unemployment could you possibly increase your hours temprorarily and he take over childcare?

Regarding the DMP - do you mind me asking who manages this for you? We are with payplan and they are quite flexible and they should be willing to accept reduced payments. Any other non-priority debts? If so, see if you can get them added to the DMP.

I totally understand regarding the head in the sand approach but it does only make things worse in the end, if you absolutely can face it, try and get some plans in place now. Definately talk to your Debt management company about reducing payments or at least taking a payment holiday if possible.

Flowers This is a set back, yes, its a big one, but you are not fucked xx

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FannyFifer · 04/04/2016 16:50

Has he been sacked already?
Can he resign & apply for literally anything to ride you over before applying in same line of work.
I would resign before getting sacked.

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FannyFifer · 04/04/2016 16:51

Tide you over not ride obvs.

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TheSunHasGotItsHatOn · 04/04/2016 16:54

You can claim contribution based jsa as long as you have paid NI Contributions for the last 52 weeks, it is income based jsa you may not be able to claim after being sacked for the first 13 weeks.

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ConfuciousSayWhat · 04/04/2016 16:57

Can you increase your hours to make up the shortfall so you can then claim whatever benefits you need?

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LIZS · 04/04/2016 16:59

How long has he been employed? His employment can be terminated within 2 years without reason and no redress to unfair dismissal unless specific circumstances apply. Worth speaking to ACAS perhaps in case he can raise a grievance and sign on anyway. Could you claim JSA if you don't work many hours?

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LineyReborn · 04/04/2016 17:09

Yes it would really help to know how long he's been in the job. And how many hours you work.

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justabigmess · 04/04/2016 17:16

He is on a final written warning first was for been late which he was, after that its been like a bloody witch hunt.

Hes registered with every agency going and been put forward for loads of jobs not had anything back hes got 2 weeks to prove himself theyve said but they are already interviewing managers mates for his job so know how its going to go. He wants to resign in fact he wants to resign today after theyve handed him a letter to say hes not doing enough overtime or showing comitment.

Didnt know he could still get his contribution based thank you for that.

The dmp is informal i sorted it myself with guidance from a charity. Think i will have to go through one of the charities now.

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Emptynestx2 · 04/04/2016 17:16

If he's worked for them for two years surely they can't sack him without going through a process or warnings? I would definitely file a grievance for unfair dismissal and he might get more money to tide you over at least. As others have said its better to resign if possible. You will be ok, you just have to get through this and there is help out there. Don't give up without a fight!

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justabigmess · 04/04/2016 17:16

Hes been there just over 2 years i work 18 no chance of increasing though.

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LineyReborn · 04/04/2016 17:19

He shouldn't resign in that case, unless he's got a clear shot at constructive dismissal.

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