AIBU to not go on the pill?

(14 Posts)
VenusInFauxFurs Mon 04-Apr-16 15:02:51

I am currently in a non-exclusive relationship. Although it's open I'm not currently having sex with anyone else. Obviously condoms are non-negotiable. However, they are also the only type of contraception I am using. Should I be using some other kind of contraception, do you think?

I have only relatively recently become sexually active after a fifteen year gap so this hasn't really come up before.

When I took the pill years and years ago, it really messed with my moods. I have depression and am currently going through a bit of a low patch at the moment (I'm on ADs). I am wary of taking the pill because I don't want to make my depression worse. I know that different pills might have different side effects. But presumably it takes a while to sort that shit out.

I would rather rely on condoms. I feel like this should be sufficient because I'm 42. It's not like I'm massively fertile.

Also the chap I'm seeing has some ejaculation issues and never comes inside me. We have sex but he finishes off by hand. So what with that, my age and the fact that we're using condoms means that me getting knocked up would be pretty miraculous.

(Obviously the coming inside me thing could change if I start seeing someone else.)

AIBU to assume that condoms are sufficient in my circumstances?

MadameDePompom Mon 04-Apr-16 15:07:59

Used correctly condoms should be enough protection. I'm not a massive fan of the pill either.

MissMooMoo Mon 04-Apr-16 15:10:26

Yanbu. DH and I used condoms to avoid pregnancy for years.

pearlylum Mon 04-Apr-16 15:12:17

If your boyfriend is having sex with other women then you should absolutely be using condoms.

MrsTerryPratchett Mon 04-Apr-16 15:12:57

I was going to come on and tell you condoms aren't sufficient. But withdrawal and condoms, which is what you are actually doing, sounds more reliable.

Don't think being 42 is protection! If you meet someone else, you may have to think about something in addition to condoms.

VenusInFauxFurs Mon 04-Apr-16 15:27:44

pearly, there's no question of not using condoms. It's just whether I should be considering using another contraceptive method as well.

ilovevegcrisps Mon 04-Apr-16 15:28:58

Yeah, I've only ever used condoms and never had so much of a scare.

ilovevegcrisps Mon 04-Apr-16 15:29:26

Terry why? Condoms are a really effective method of contraception.

MrsTerryPratchett Mon 04-Apr-16 15:40:54

Condoms and other methods over time. Used typically, they aren't totally effective, especially over time. Which is fine when you are in a situation where a pregnancy wouldn't be a total disaster.

MrsTerryPratchett Mon 04-Apr-16 15:42:14

Interactive version. Can you tell I like graphs?

specialsubject Mon 04-Apr-16 16:28:25

nothing is totally effective except abstinence. But condoms are very effective if used correctly. No reason to go on the pill if you use them every time; and given that he is shagging around, you should.

BUT any slip ups or slip offs - get the MAP. You are nowhere near too old to get pregnant.

LaurieLemons Mon 04-Apr-16 16:32:15

If he's not finishing in you and you're using condoms then that's probably just as reliable I wouldn't worry.

BlueJug Mon 04-Apr-16 22:06:14

A diaphragm? Found it brilliant. Only you know. No effect on moods.

Fourarmsv2 Mon 04-Apr-16 23:03:53

We've used the withdrawal method successfully for 16y. When I told the doc at the FP clinic (getting coil fitted) she was obviously worried for my fertility. But DS2 was conceived 1st try. We've obviously been lucky!

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