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AIBU?

To ask how to feel better-anxiety related

19 replies

supermariossister · 29/03/2016 15:50

I've been unwell for a while various tests and appointments and I have been diagnosed with anxiety and stress, I was already being treated for stomach issues with mebeverine. I have episodes of palpitations and panic and have been hospitalised for panic attacks before -the doctors have put me on a stress course which I am trying to give my best too take on board but I feel horrible at a moments notice, just been to pick ds up and all of a sudden came over roasting,shaky and feeling like I was going to faint, it's as though I can't focus properly and aren't really here. I'm so fed up and want to feel better, does anyone have any experience of anxiety or ideas to get control.

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dippyeggy · 29/03/2016 15:58

Propanolol which is a beta blocker can help with the physical symptoms (racing heart etc).

I personally don't get on with antidepressants but lots of people do find them helpful for anxiety.

I still struggle tbh but find just feeling the fear and doing it anyway is often the only way to get through it.

I've been floored by anxiety so many times and I think my mindset is slowly changing and I'm realising that I don't have control over everything, crap stuff is going to happen and me worrying and getting anxious just makes it worse.

You have my sympathies anxiety is a bastard!

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Sothisishowitfeels · 29/03/2016 16:02

I normally write three things on a bit of paper that I want/ need to do , just small things. Then I focus really hard on one at a time . Even If I feel totally terrible , I normally find that as I go through I start to feel more in control

I also take sertraline

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supermariossister · 29/03/2016 16:06

I'm sorry to hear you have both struggled too, I have to admit before I was taken I to hospital it is not something I ever understood it's very difficult to explain to someone else just how bad it makes you feel. My doctor seems intent on not offering any medication at all as apparently I need to learn how to control how I feel, which is all well and good when feeling okay but harder in the moment as you know. Good idea with the writing things down, I ended up putting Netflix on in the playground so I had something to focus on as I just wanted to get up and run. It's almost like the feeling when you are starving hungry and your legs shake, head swims.

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OracleofDelphi · 29/03/2016 16:25

You poor thing... I sufered with anxiety OCD and GAD for 25 years and 2 years ago and 1:2:1 CBT on NHS. I can honestly say it is stand alone the best thing I have ever done. It totlly changed the way I think and ulitmatly that is what it is.

Have you ever done a CBT thought diary? You can google the to print one off. Do it now as they always help me as see if it has any impact on what you think or feel.

Have you read anything about CBT, as it basically challenges the way you think?

I also try to meditate (even if just for 10 mins) every day if I can (or at least 3-4 times a week). This helps your brain realise what is and isn't important.

Finally - Im not "cured" I never think that. I always thing that the is something I will struggle with and have to be mindful of. Now if I start to get ridiculously anxious then I remind myslf that this is the Anxiety / Obsessive thought thats thinking that, not me. Please go to your Dr and see if there is anything they can do as it really id change my whole life.

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OracleofDelphi · 29/03/2016 16:28

Also as supermario says in my therapy I foucsed really heavily on distraction when I had a bad thought or obsessive need. So I would practice something that I had to concentrate on really hard. Like doing my 7 times tables in my head as high as I could go. Or thinking of all food starting with the letter C. To begin with you know you are distracting yourself, but after a minute or two I would become quite absorbed in these thoughts and almost forget what I was anxious about. Every time your mind floats back to the bad thought, go back to the distraction task.... It hard work forcing yourself to think like this but it does help a lot

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supermariossister · 29/03/2016 16:31

I will print the diary, am literally willing to give anything that might help a go! I spend my life rushing through things always thinking of the next thing it's exhausting and sucks the fun out of everything. My doctor says I have to finish this six week course before anything else and it's only week 3, it's a group course where you don't talk just listen. I am glad to read that although not cured you can recognise the signs and manage then, gives me hope.

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AliceScarlett · 29/03/2016 16:34

www.ntw.nhs.uk/pic/selfhelp

Click on the anxiety one.

Download the Calm app.

Anxiety is horrible, but it won't kill you and it does pass Flowers

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OracleofDelphi · 29/03/2016 16:38

I would say I am 95% better now. I am also aware of what causes me to feel worse... So tiredness, eating badly and before I get my period.

I also try to force myself to do things that I dont want to do. So sometimes I get a bit worked up about who is outside (there isnt anyone! but I worry that they might do something bad to me, DC or DH). So if I feel like that, I make sure I go for a walk outside, or to the shop. When I get out of my car and night I dont scuttle straight to the front door in a panic; I stand on the front step and take 10 deep breaths.

So it doesnt have to be really big challenges, but every time you think something anxious if you can counter balance with an action it an help. Like not wanting to go to that party, then make sure you go.

Meditation helps the anxiety that comes out of no where as well. If you do have one, dont worry, all things pass, it will too. (easier said than done). Just take baby steps. Very unmumsnetty hugs to you...

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supermariossister · 29/03/2016 21:46

I am glad you have found ways to deal with it and like you say it's accepting that it won't go away instantly which I find hard. I'm trying hard to keep doing things even when I feel uncomfortable, I find I'm really bad when I haven't eaten properly or if I have lots of sweet stuff no idea why it works like that just seems too.

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pastizzi · 29/03/2016 22:03

Please try the anxiietynomore app. Utterly life changing, using an approach I had never heard anywhere else. There are a couple of accompanying books too

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Cleorapter · 29/03/2016 22:03

CBT really has helped me, it doesn't make it go away, but it does teach you how to handle it in a more productive way.

Eating well does help, eating sugar will give you a high, but then dips in your blood sugar later on (as will not eating much) and will make you feel worse. Also stay hydrated. Exercise, it is cliche but it really, really does help.

I practice Mindfulness too, which I find beneficial.

Writing things down helps, it gives me something to do and to see my anxiety/fear in a 'physical' form usually brings home how irrational the fear is and I can process it a bit better.

Since I have been doing all the above, i have only had one anxiety attack, and for me, that is a huge step as I was a bit of a wreck before.

Hope you start to feel a little better soon. It is a bastard to live with. Flowers

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supermariossister · 30/03/2016 11:14

Feeling okay today, have plastered on my make up and straightened my hair which always helps i tend to feel worse when im not put together. Have downloaded a couple of the apps, the food is an ongoing challenge as things are pretty tight so trying to look at healthy but cheap options i have a lot of trouble swallowing so that can be pretty hindering too.

The sun is shining today and ive just organised for the soil to come for the community garden so we can get started, feel positive if nothing else!

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Julietee · 30/03/2016 11:55

I understand the swallowing thing.
Another lifelong sufferer here.
There will be good times and bad times - obviously this is one of the bad times!
There will be years you don't remember how bad it got.

Get cbt, get Meds if the cbt alone isn't enough. Be kind to yourself.

The longer I live with this shitty anxious brain the more I feel it's a disability. There are things I'd dearly love to do that I just can't manage... I am limited. Hopefully, my new ssri will kick in soon and clear my path again!

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supermariossister · 30/03/2016 12:00

I hope so and then you can achieve some of these things you want to do, it is hard isnt it and i dont think anyone who hasnt suffered can really understand how much of an effect it has, i am somewhat relived to hear that you can relate to the swallowing issues as i was beginning to wonder why that happens at all!

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Beautifulstorm · 30/03/2016 12:11

Epsom salt baths. Magnesium capsules. Claire weekes, her free audios are online and advocate what finally sealed my recovery. Mindfulness.

All of those together make the world of difference for me and they each have good reviews.

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Imeg · 30/03/2016 13:27

I have a book called 'overcoming anxiety, stress and panic' (see link below) which is based on CBT and has sensible advice - my anxiety is milder than yours by the sound of things but I didn't realise how much it was affecting me until I read the descriptions of anxious behaviour in the book. I find the approach common sense but also positive. It's quite a big book but there are different chapters which may not all be relevant to you and each chapter isn't that long and is very easy to read so don't let that put you off. There are lots of practical activities and links to online resources too.
If you go to a big library you could have a look at a few similar books and see which one might suit you best.
I also find exercise helps, and avoiding spending too much time on the computer aimlessly faffing about (I started doing a lot of this when I was breastfeeding and haven't quite got out of the habit). Also hormonal changes - I felt a lot worse when the night feeds cut down, which with hindsight was probably due to the reduction in oxytocin.
For me, wheat makes my IBS worse and a high fibre diet helps, but I know this varies a lot for different people. I thought I just had digestive problems and didn't realise how much it was linked to stress and anxiety.
I think the most useful thing for me was realising how much I can do to improve my state of mind.

www.amazon.co.uk/Overcoming-Anxiety-Stress-Panic-Approach/dp/1444163140/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1459340239&sr=8-1&keywords=overcoming%20stress%2C%20anxiety%20and%20panic&tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21

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Imeg · 30/03/2016 19:19

PS I think the link between the IBS and anxiety goes both ways for me: stress has an adverse effect on my digestion, but also when the IBS is bad it seems to directly make me more anxious. Not sure how any of it works physiologically but definitely something I've noticed.

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cherrybloom · 30/03/2016 19:28

I second the anxietynomore app!!life changing for me Flowers

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FantasticButtocks · 30/03/2016 19:38
  1. Meditation (try Buddhify app)
  2. As much walking outside or swimming or whatever exercise you can fit in.
  3. Appreciation diary. Write three things each night that you were grateful for or appreciated during the day. This trains your brain to be on the lookout for the good stuff.
  4. 7/11 breathing. In...for a count of seven, out for 11.

Battery about to die, hence abrupt response, sorry. Thanks
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