To think that I have odd parents?

[Igottastartthinkingbee]

They have been staying over at ours for Easter. DH away with his hobby so me, 2 small DC (18months and 4) and grandparents are to have a few days of trips out/Easter egg hunts/ general hanging out.

DH has decided to cut his trip short because of the weather. So him and his friend are coming back here tonight and will probably do their hobby somewhere more locally tomorrow. We have lots of room for the extra guest to stay over.

I finally get downstairs after settling DCs to bed and DM and DF inform me that they're going home! And mention that extra guest is the reason why. Feel that they're 'crowding us out'. They're not. DF has an issue with plans changing at the last minute. He cannot cope with dealing with anything unexpected.

So I'm pissed off that they've gone because:

1. They haven't said goodbye to the DCs who are expecting them to still be here tomorrow
   
2. They'll miss the excitement of the egg hunt (and it would've been more exciting with them here instead of just me)
   
3. I have an extra day on my own with the DCs.
   
4. It was quite nice having some adult company with DH being away and I'm sat here like a lemon on my own. DH and friend aren't back till quite late.
   

I'm sure DM would've stayed when I tried to talk them round. DH and friend will be gone after breakfast and not back till teatime. I cannot see the issue but DF had made his mind up so off they went. I am now eating a massive chocolate egg all to myself .

btw my parents mainly DF are odd in other ways but I haven't the will to go into everything!

[edwinbear]

Do they know the friend who is staying? I expect they were looking forward to a family Easter with their daughter and grandchildren and are worried about making conversation with a stranger if it's someone they don't know.

[KimmySchmidtsSmile]

That sucks
Ah well more and for you.
Was your Dad scared of small talk? Do they get on with DH?
Given that the two coming back was not going to impinge a lot on their visit, it is strange that they are 'put out' enough to leave on Easter Saturday without thought to the GC. So yes, strange, rude, sulky, attention sweeping, no longer feel welcome/special snowflakes or whatever or just very antisocial/not okay with 'strangers'/undiagnosed on the autie spectrum.
Have as good a two days as you can love xxx

[KimmySchmidtsSmile]

seeking, obvs!

[absolutelynotfabulous]

Perhaps they didn't fancy staying and the "guest" gave them a convenient excuse?

[Igottastartthinkingbee]

Thanks for replying. They have met the friend a couple of times but don't know him well. He's a nice, chatty interesting bloke who's quite normal really! I was taken aback because in reality they'd only have had to make small talk over breakfast as DH probably won't be back till gone 11pm when we'd have all been in bed. But now they gone they'll be missing what will hopefully still be a lovely day with their grandchildren (who they don't see regularly as they live two hours away).

[Igottastartthinkingbee]

Well absolutely they haven't given me that impression in the last two days. They brought an Easter egg hunt kit with them so obviously intended to stay on Easter Sunday. Oh well, back to the chocolate

[absolutelynotfabulous]

Oh I dunno...people can be a bit strange. Maybe they're making a point about them not being the centre of attention now the guest is there? It may sound a bit bonkers, but my mother would've been like this.

[TheBouquets]

Maybe there is some feeling that they have not discussed with you. Or that you have not picked up on. Perhaps they had hoped to spend the weekend with you their daughter and the grandchildren without even your OH being there. The hobby friend was just one step too far for them.
It could be undiagnosed ASD. They have decided to undertake a two hour journey which was not planned, which makes it look like they or DF can change plans at a moments notice.
Give it a few days and then try to ask them quietly and without putting forward any suggestions of excuses why they left so suddenly. Explain that you and DCs are disappointed that they cut short their weekend with you.

[Igottastartthinkingbee]

Ughhh have you inherited any of your mother's oddness absolutely? I genuinely worry that I will turn out like my father.

[CadleCrap]

You can get Easter egg hunt kits? < misses point>

[Igottastartthinkingbee]

ASD? Is that autism bouquets?

[Igottastartthinkingbee]

cadle I already have the darn Easter egg kit, they brought another one with them!

[Creampastry]

They are quite mean for not sticking around to say goodbye to their grandkids. Selfish of them and that speaks volumes IMO.

[Katarzyna79]

I think it's old age behaviour first signs of mental health issues, my dad does stuff like that a lot. Some folks don't like change, my dad is such a grumpy man. If someone comes that he only knows a little bit but not a complete stranger rather than making small talk for like 5 mins just to ask after them he will go hide in his room until theyre gone lol

when I used to visit after a 6-7 hr journey he'd open the door and rather than hugging me he'd say "why have you come for?" lool

i'll come to the egg hunt, I can roll over like an egg I'm such a lard ass pregnant ball right now ur kids will mistake me for a big easter egg

[moreshitandnofuckingredemption]

I could see mine doing this. It would be my mum's concern about (for example) meeting friend on the landing without her teeth in. No point arguing really but I would be disappointed too.

[Mishaps]

What a shame that you were happy to welcome them and they have rejected this. Speaking as a mother and MIL I love it when my children's friends are around - the way that they accept all generations is very heartening. When I was young it definitely was not like that.

Your parents are missing out by going home - what a wasted opportunity! Crazy!

[YoureNotAlone]

It's your DC that I feel sorry for. I hope they aren't too upset when they wake to find their Grandparents have suddenly gone. I know my DD would be

[MardyGrave]

This is something I'd do, I'd feel uncomfortable with the change of plans put upon me/wouldn't have accepted the invitation if I'd known that was the original plan.

[Xmasbaby11]

It is a bit odd to change plans for what seems to be no good reason. I'd be annoyed you're left with a free day at the last minute when you could have made plans.

Some grandparents forget that young children get upset with last minute changes and not being said goodbye to. They should have made their decision earlier - they are just being a bit thoughtless.

[GreatFuckability]

i'd be inclined to want to go to , if i'm honest. because i'm so ridiculously socially awkward. but i recognise that i'm odd.

[TheBouquets]

ASD is Autistic Spectrum Disorder. Or it could just be one person's foibles. We all have little habits and like to do little things certain ways. It is about how much the ASD affects everyday life. (Or so I believe I am new on this myself)

[Witchend]

My df would probably do similar. In his case he's so keen not to get in the way he goes too far iyswim.

[scarlets]

It could be that your father is pathetic and petulant, or that he's not up for being sociable with someone he doesn't know well, or it could be that he feels he made an effort to come and help you out with the children over Easter in your DH's absence only for DH to be there anyway, but mucking about with a mate rather than focusing on the kids.

[AgentZigzag]

It's not on of them to up and leave without saying anything to their GC, but maybe they're leaving for another reason but don't want to say what?

It's kind of like you're guessing at a stranger's reason for going home rather than knowing what your parents are like and thinking they must have a good reason for going.

[Igottastartthinkingbee]

That's interesting bouquets I've never considered ASD but it would explain a few things. On the surface my family are quite normal but there are some underlying issues which I have always thought stem from my father. Two of my siblings are very socially awkward and have little self confidence. I am going off the original subject here a smidge and don't think I want to air much more of this on MN. Thanks for everyone's comments, glad it's not just me who thinks they've been out of line. Hopefully the DCs will be so pleased to see their dad in the morning that they won't mind/notice too much that their grandparents aren't here.