Mother's have it tough

(322 Posts)
Zenab1 Wed 16-Mar-16 22:13:32

Hello mothers, so I had an incident which left me humiliated and angry today. I went to Chatham House, a policy institution in central london to attend a talk that was happening there. When I get to the conference hall, I was told that I was not allowed to get in with my buggy in which my baby girl was peaceful sleeping. Their main excuse was, it's gonna block the way in case people need to evacuate for emergency. I said but this information is not communicated anywhere on your website and I even called to double check and the person I spoke to said you are mother friendly. Anyway, they insisted that I leave the building because they won't let me in. I got so emotional and told them that was unfair as I came from a long way and the whole thing seemed to me some kind of discrimination. They escorted me out and told me that I should complain if I like to by sending an email. I felt so humiliated and degraded. Do you think this was right ladies, it happening in this day and age and in one of the worlds developed countries, that a mum should be mistreated like this for simple being mum?

VegasIsBest Wed 16-Mar-16 22:16:44

Were they worried that your baby would disturb the talk? It would never have occurred to me to take my baby to something serious like that due to the impact on others.

wholecanofbeans Wed 16-Mar-16 22:18:50

What was the nature of the talk? Was it a public meeting? Or a lecture?

grannytomine Wed 16-Mar-16 22:19:10

Well it isn't only mothers who are out with babies. I'm a granny but often seen out with grandchild and buggy, my son also goes out with his son and buggy.

Could you have folded the buggy, would they have let you leave it somewhere?

Sparklingbrook Wed 16-Mar-16 22:19:22

Yes, a talk doesn't sound like somewhere a baby would be welcome, but would you have been allowed in without the buggy?

Fratelli Wed 16-Mar-16 22:19:58

There aren't just mums on here. Or just ladies. Yabu for taking a baby to a serious talk.

ouryve Wed 16-Mar-16 22:20:00

I wouldn't have taken either of my babies to an event like that.

Arfarfanarf Wed 16-Mar-16 22:20:07

Certainly should have been communicated, yes.
Perhaps an unemotional email saying you were inconvenienced by their oversight and they should specify no pushchairs and that way parents know to make other arrangements.

You were not discriminated against for being a mother unless you saw fathers, grandparents or carers with pushchairs so i would change mum to parent/ carer if you decide to email.

Was there a space allocated to fold pushchairs so parents could hold babies while attending?

Certainly if you feel strongly there is no reason why you can't make them aware of this if they claim to be mother friendly (family friendly? ) then ask them what they mean by this.

Sirzy Wed 16-Mar-16 22:20:24

Doesn't sound like a child friendly event. But either way places don't need to accommodate for buggies. I wouldn't expect a conference hall to be buggy friendly really!

Cutecat78 Wed 16-Mar-16 22:20:46

What?

SohowdoIdothis Wed 16-Mar-16 22:21:07

Maybe they are mother friendly but not baby friendly, I don't think most lectures/talks are baby friendly.

MaidOfStars Wed 16-Mar-16 22:24:41

I can't see that ANY event/talk held there would be remotely child friendly.

Zenab1 Wed 16-Mar-16 22:26:36

It was a public talk which I was really interested and I couldn't find anyone to leave her with. She was asleep at the time so didn't want to take her out of the buggy.

edwinbear Wed 16-Mar-16 22:29:10

You took a baby to a lecture then kicked off because they wouldn't let you take your buggy into the lecture theatre? confused YABU.

WorraLiberty Wed 16-Mar-16 22:29:44

The buggy probably contravened the fire regulations then.

Sparklingbrook Wed 16-Mar-16 22:29:52

Well if they say the buggy was a H&S issue and you wouldn't take the baby out there's not much that could be done.

Sirzy Wed 16-Mar-16 22:30:13

Unfortunately when you have children sometimes you have to accept you can't always do things you want to do because not everything is a child friendly (and that's fine it doesn't need to be)

WilLiAmHerschel Wed 16-Mar-16 22:30:33

Yabu.

ctjoy103 Wed 16-Mar-16 22:31:22

Yabu why did you take a baby to a lecture. And you sound a bit dramatic with all 'mother', 'mum' stuff.

londonrach Wed 16-Mar-16 22:31:55

Why would you take a baby to that sort of event. Yabu

WilLiAmHerschel Wed 16-Mar-16 22:32:36

You could have attended with your child, all you had to do was remove her from the buggy. That doesn't sound like it wasn't child-friendly.

MarkRuffaloCrumble Wed 16-Mar-16 22:33:15

mistreated, humiliated, degraded?!

Zenab, I think you need to get out more. If this is really as humiliating and degrading as your life gets think yourself lucky.

You missed a talk because they didn't want the fire exits blocked with a pushchair. confused

If the problem was the pushchair then perhaps they ARE indeed 'mother friendly' whatever that means, and if your baby was in peacefully sleeping in a sling it wouldn't have been an issue.

Or perhaps the venue is 'mother friendly' in that they have changing tables and bottle warming or BFing facilities, but that particular event was not suitable for babies. I have to say 'policy institute' doesn't scream 'BYO baby' to me.

PurpleDaisies Wed 16-Mar-16 22:33:58

She was asleep at the time so didn't want to take her out of the buggy.

Totally your choice. You do not have an absolute right to take a buggy anywhere you want to go.

edwinbear Wed 16-Mar-16 22:35:21

OP I'm really interested in eating at The Fat Duck, but to date, have had to give it a miss because I haven't been able to get childcare and I'm not sure Heston (nor the other diners), would want me wheeling a buggy with sleeping child in.

Thisismyfirsttime Wed 16-Mar-16 22:35:52

I'd wonder where they put wheelchair users in this instance but that has nothing to do with being a mum or a woman.

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