To be feeling completely and utterly sorry for myself?

(20 Posts)
FarelyKnuts Wed 16-Mar-16 20:54:09

I know. I know. People have shit awful stuff happen to them all the time. And there are others way way worse off than me.
But am really hitting the wall today.
After months of chemotherapy and an invasive operation with the end result of needing a colostomy bag (and more chemo to come yet) for ovarian cancer we get the news that my mother is Stage 3c which gives her about a 25% survival rate over 5 years.
I also had a fall the last week and have a small fracture to my elbow and soft tissue damage to my wrist and arm and now just as I'm about to have holidays from work to spend a little bit of time that is not running between hospital, parents, work etc I have been hit by a shitty fluey head cold thing on my last day of work.
I feel like just screaming with the stress of it all! AIBU to just want to take up heavy drug use at this stage?? confused grin joking not joking

scarednoob Wed 16-Mar-16 20:55:32

Not at all, you poor thing. I have nothing useful to say, except be kind to yourself too wine

londonrach Wed 16-Mar-16 20:56:38

Farely sorry to hear you having such a rotten time. Xxxx flowers xxxx

BadFam1 Wed 16-Mar-16 20:58:15

Sorry to hear you are having a bad time op.

abbsismyhero Wed 16-Mar-16 20:58:32

don't do it you will suffer horrible side effects come read and enjoy funny threads on mumsnet go into classics have a laugh for an hour before you face reality again its a great stress reliever flowers

sorry you're having a shit time i hope its someone else's turn soon (although not mine please ive had my share too!)

EverySongbirdSays Wed 16-Mar-16 20:59:53

Yanbu - Shitty things happen all the time of course but to have cancer and be struggling only to find out that your mother happens to have cancer too is seriously dreadful and not just a run of the mill moan that everyone goes through. I haven't got much advice to offer but if physically you need painkillers or anything you are not BU to take them. Best wishes OP flowers

ghostyslovesheep Wed 16-Mar-16 20:59:59

awww I think you are perfectly entitled to feel sorry for yourself x flowers wine

FarelyKnuts Wed 16-Mar-16 21:00:34

Thanks lovely MNers. I am just having a moan really. I'll put my big girl pants on again tomorrow.
Sometimes life is just a bit shit isn't it?

FarelyKnuts Wed 16-Mar-16 21:02:57

No no I don't have cancer Songbird. That's all my mum god love her.

memyselfandaye Wed 16-Mar-16 21:06:22

That all sounds utterly shit OP

You are perfectly entitled to moan, its not fair, I think we all go through periods where everything seems to happen all at once and you have a perfect shitstorm of shitness.

Fuck that British stiff upper lip, let it all out.

flowers

memyselfandaye Wed 16-Mar-16 21:08:48

Oh and try that first defence cold and flu nose spray, I honestly think it helps cut down the length and severity of a cold.

FarelyKnuts Wed 16-Mar-16 21:10:23

Good tip memyself thank you. Will see if I can get it from the chemist tomorrow.

Tiggeryoubastard Wed 16-Mar-16 21:13:58

YABU to ask us if YABU. What a shitty, shitty time you're having. Make sure you take care of yourself.

AliceInUnderpants Wed 16-Mar-16 21:23:52

flowers

If I had a 25% chance of winning the lottery within 5 years, I'd play every bloody week <3

FarelyKnuts Wed 16-Mar-16 21:29:00

Thanks Alice. It's a good perspective. And I am trying to be positive but it's a bit of a shock.
On the other hand you'd not jump out of an aeroplane if someone told you'd a 75% chance your parachute wouldn't open would you?
We were kind of led to believe the chemo and operation were going to fix it. We weren't expecting it would be so extensive or that the operation wouldn't get all the cancer.
I guess the last 9 months of hoping and positivity have just taken a bit of a nosedive with the latest news sad

wtffgs Wed 16-Mar-16 21:30:49

That sounds utterly crapsadwinebrew

FarelyKnuts Wed 16-Mar-16 21:43:34

Thanks wtffgs.
I don't drink as it happens but am seriously considering taking it up as a new hobby!

FarelyKnuts Thu 17-Mar-16 06:20:01

Ah seriously fuck this!
I dozed from 1.30-3am and am awake for no shagging reason except worrying about bloody everything!
I know worrying does fuck all and changes fuck all. I have a fever and feel like shite and I really really WANT to sleep but can I? Can I fuck! I shagging well give up.
Arsing bastard fuck off universe. I've HAD ENOUGH!!!

AvaLeStrange Thu 17-Mar-16 06:49:19

Bless you, and your mum. flowers

Sometimes life is just fecking relentless isn't it?

I know it's not ideal, but can you order a shopping delivery of your fave goodies, a book or magazine and just make yourself cosy with a couple of box sets and take it easy for a couple of days.

Really resting as much as you can will probably help a lot, especially if you rarely get the chance.

Look after yourself and hope your mum is managing ok too.

Abraid2 Thu 17-Mar-16 06:50:33

Look after yourself,

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