Husband asked me to 'stop having a go' at him ??!!

(46 Posts)
whosthemumma Wed 16-Mar-16 20:53:57

Is he 13??? Am I his mum ??? Is this a normal conversation for a husband and wife ??!! I only asked him to get off the phone and talk to his kids, shame on me !!!

Bailey101 Wed 16-Mar-16 21:01:16

It depends if you were actually having a go or not. If someone was in my face getting onto me, I'd probably say the same.

If you weren't having a go, then he maybe overreacted.

lorelei9 Wed 16-Mar-16 21:03:26

As an adult, if another adult told me to get off the phone, I would be really annoyed.

BastardGoDarkly Wed 16-Mar-16 21:04:40

Having a go, is a perfectly adult way of saying he felt 'got at' were you having a go?

BastardGoDarkly Wed 16-Mar-16 21:05:16

??!!??!

Wolfiefan Wed 16-Mar-16 21:05:46

Why did you have to ask an adult to get off the phone?

StillStayingClassySanDiego Wed 16-Mar-16 21:06:20

I think you were unreasonable based on your OP.

ChemistryHunt Wed 16-Mar-16 21:06:34

Definitely depends on context.

What the call was about, how long it had been, if he had agreed to do something then was gossiping instead, your tone of voice etc etc

I have to say though I hate being interrupted when I am speaking to someone, particularly as I keep drumming it into the DCs heads they must not interrupt people talking unless really important/emergency.

sonjadog Wed 16-Mar-16 21:09:33

I think you need to explain more. As it stands, I think adults are allowed to decide how long they spend on the phone themselves.

Lightbulbon Wed 16-Mar-16 21:11:12

You're not his boss.

If he's a shit husband, leave him.

BillyDaveysDaughter Wed 16-Mar-16 21:11:22

Presumably he was just reacting to feeling "got at". Quite polite really, my DH would have excused himself from his convo to tell me to piss off if I did that. wink

Are you lashing out because you feel you were justified? What response were you aiming for?

KinkyAfro Wed 16-Mar-16 21:13:29

I read it as her DP was playing on his phone and ignoring the children. I don't think yabu, it would annoy me too and I'd probably have said something too

TattyDevine Wed 16-Mar-16 21:14:02

If it's always happening, you may have a case, but it my be more effective to speak to him at a different time. It may be that this conversation may never go well.

It depends what he was doing - if it was stressful (checking a bank balance, or doing a work email) then you might choose your time. If he's just jeffing around on Candy Crush an ignoring everyone, he might need a heads up about himself.

Hard to say!

KinkyAfro Wed 16-Mar-16 21:14:03

Lashing out? Hardly

whatyouseeiswhatyouget Wed 16-Mar-16 21:14:25

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Shesinfashion Wed 16-Mar-16 21:15:59

What he said was perfectly reasonable. It's up to him when he decides to end a phone call.

possum18 Wed 16-Mar-16 21:16:36

Agree with pp's depends what he was doing. DH is glued to his phone for work 90% of his waking day so when he's not working and sitting there playing annoying games it does get frustrating

whosthemumma Wed 16-Mar-16 21:17:28

Maybe I should have clarified he was just looking at his phone, at cars we can't afford to buy I believe . It was more about what he said I felt, a rather childish respond ??

CottonSock Wed 16-Mar-16 21:18:24

Sounds very much like an argument I had we dh before Christmas. He was using phone / emails in a restaurant with friends. I needed help with DD and he didn't look up. Right bloody row after but I'm not sure who was most unreasonable as apparently I talked down to him about it in front of friends. (I was also pregnant and rough if that makes me sound any better).

Shesinfashion Wed 16-Mar-16 21:19:43

You sound more childish than him.

whosthemumma Wed 16-Mar-16 21:19:49

Yes poosum18 same here !! But it's often hard to differentiate when it's a work email and when it's just messing around. I appreciate every one needs down time but when it's bed time would it be awful to give your 3 children your attention ?? To be honest it was what he said !! 'Stop having a go at me !!' Really ??!! Would you say that to your significant other ??

TooOldForGlitter Wed 16-Mar-16 21:20:49

You aren't giving enough information for anyone to pass a reasonable comment.

Going on what you've said, YABU. He can look at what he wants on his phone as long as he isn't ignoring a responsibility.

whosthemumma Wed 16-Mar-16 21:21:05

Wow I'm quite schooled at some people's responses , I'm childish ?? Thought tjis was a mums group ?? For support. Never mind

TooOldForGlitter Wed 16-Mar-16 21:21:43

X post.

TooOldForGlitter Wed 16-Mar-16 21:22:10

Support for what?!

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