DC are 8, 4 and 11 months and I'm a SAHM. I have given up my (successful) career indefinitely because I wanted to be a SAHM, and to allow DH to progress in his career. He works four long days per week. He doesn't do bedtime, bathtime or night wakings or anything at all around the home besides cooking occasionally.
We were away at the weekend so on Monday 11 mo was tired. I dropped eldest two at school/nursery, got 11 mo to sleep, unpacked everything, did two loads of washing, washed up, hoovered whole house, collected 4 yo from nursery and gave DC lunch. Then we went food shopping and 11 mo had another nap while I unpacked it and prepared tea before collecting 8 yo from school, cooking tea and taking all dc to her activity. Then returned home to wash up, iron uniform and sort out washing. So a whole day and no time at all for playing. DH, on the other hand, was sat watching TV when we returned from the activity and had two hours to play with 4 yo before I took all dc to bed. 8 yo read to me as I did jobs and 11 mo followed me around.
Today DH was off and has done absolutely nothing besides be with the dc. He doesn't actively play as such (more loosely supervises) and the DC are constantly asking me to play but I always have things to do. When 4 yo was at nursery this morning i would have loved to just play with baby but the ironing needed doing so I did that while DH watched baby empty cupboards Then I needed to make lunch, clean pets out, hoover etc and before I knew it, it was time to collect 8 yo from school again.
I said to my sister that it feels pointless being with DH because he doesn't contribute to the household besides financially and she said IABU because I'd still have to do all the jobs if DH wasn't here. While this is true, I don't think that means it's fair that I continue to do it all and always be rushing around while he just sits around. If I was alone, I could at least do jobs while the DC were in bed and get more time with them during the day. AIBU to tell DH that I became a SAHM to be with the children, not to be a housekeeper and that he needs to pull his finger out?
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Please
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AIBU?
to want more time to play with my DC?
34 replies
lucyloveslemonade · 08/03/2016 23:34
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