Preschoolers "writing" in MD cards

[WorriedMuch]

My Facebook/Instagram feed is full of contacts gushing about Mothers' Day and in many cases with pictures of the inside of their MD cards, showing the little messages supposedly written by their preschoolers. (Let's ignore for the moment how smug this is).

As these are contacts from NCT, nursery etc, their kids are the same age as mine - just about to turn or just turned four.

My DD isn't interested in writing (or drawing, for that matter). Loves words and spotting letters, and is starting to read a bit, but couldn't give a monkeys about forming letters on paper. Can just about scrawl her initial and a handful of other letters, but certainly can't write "dear mummy, I love you, from Daniel" or whatnot, however messily.

She's starting school in September. AIBU to worry about her peers apparently being so much further ahead in this skill? Or to suspect that these messages were actually written left handed by the parents instead

[Katastrophe13]

My 4 year old can write his name from copying and that's it. Some of his friends can write their name from memory. Don't know any that would be capable of writing a heartfelt message in a md card though. I am suspicious of these cards you've been seeing...

[whenwegettonarnia]

Yes, both my DD's friends were writing in cards at this age. They could all do it.

Neither of mine were interested in writing, they could just about write their names (badly) when leaving nursery at nearly 4 (summer babies).

Got WAY better at it once they started school.

I really wouldn't worry about it, both of mine have caught up loads now. But just to answer your question totally normal for 3/4 year olds to be able to write their names (just not all of them!)

[Katenka]

Ds is in receptions and has been able to write his name since a few weeks after starting the school nursery.

Today I got 'to mum, love from minikat' clearly in child like hand writing

He couldn't have written a full paragraph at preschool. I feel a bit meh about it. Anyone with any sense knows the difference between a child's hand writing and an adult.

If the letters are all perfectly formed and fairly beat, most people will guess is not the kids and laugh at the parent. Don't sweat it.

[whenwegettonarnia]

Oh, I missed the bit about the messages. What kind of messages? I'm sure many could copy a message if it was short..

[Abbbinob]

I think some kids that age can write but they would have had it written out to copy or had someone spelling the words out for them but it's also totally normal to not be writing at that age

[MissBattleaxe]

I don't think it's smug. Just a mum going all soppy. As for the writing, don't panic. When my kids were that age the teacher at present school would write in highlighter pen and the child would write over it. Another thing is that the message is printed in and the child just added their name.

[FigMango1]

Why are you so nasty? Who cares who wrote it? Maybe the dad or someone else wrote the card. Most important is the mum feels appreciated and proud. Don't be so unkind , do you feel better about running to sneer about it here.

[Chrisinthemorning]

DS 3.9 can only scribble. I'm not worried, it's developmental.
Fine motor comes later sometimes a lot later.

[IthinkIamsinking]

You sound a joy. Whinging about 'smug' people posting MD cards on social media then wondering of that means your DC is behind in the writing stakes and someone else clearly wrote on these cards.
FFS

[SoftSheen]

My DD could write messages in cards at this age, with help. Some of her friends could too. However, even her friends who struggled to write their own name at age 4 have rapidly caught up during the first few months of reception. So there is probably nothing to worry about.

[Griphook]

Don't stress, they all get there in the end. My ds 3 is of to school in sept, can with encouragement write his name. My ds 5 year 1 writing is quite bad, my friends dd 3's is more readable. But they are both maths wizards, great fun to be around and keen to learn about new things,

They just all Develope at different rates and in different areas.

[Xmasbaby11]

Dd is 4 and can only write a c, no other letters. She can't copy any letters or words. She's not good at numbers either. She does seem behind her peers but at least is interested in drawing now. Everyone tells me they are all different. I think it's normal to worry.

[fluffypenguinbelly]

Well aren't you a bundle of joy. You just sound jealous to me.

[GreenTomatoJam]

DS1 had no interest in mark making at all - he used to steal other kids drawings/paintings to give me from playgroup (non-maliciously - he just wanted something to hand me like the other kids, but didn't want to actually make anything!) . For his first year of school he was by far the worst writer. Now he's 2 years in, he's just about getting the hang of it, and I even see him choosing to colour pictures in occasionally. Like yours though, he took to reading like a duck to water, and was recognising numbers as soon as he could speak

Having never been interested, I think it's taken this long to get his hand strength up.

DS2 is the total opposite - he's been drawing for as long as he's been able to focus on a crayon. He still can't recognise numbers though.

They're all different - as long as it's within normal I just shrug and keep an eye on it.

[Hippymama]

My 4 year old preschooler has written in my card. He is able to write his name from memory and some other CVC words and will also ask people to spell words for him (he is an October baby). Perfectly normal at that age but also perfectly normal not to be able to do that yet! They're all wonderfully different :)

[slicedfinger]

It might be good to work on some fine motor skills before school. Eg holding a pencil, paint brush, doing puzzles. The actual writing not so much, but being able to control the tool.

[SeriousCreativeBlock]

My nearly 3 and a half year old can write her name, but has to copy. She can only write a few letters completely autonomously.

[NaughtToThreeSadOnions]

The thing is some children will be able to form letters just because your child isn't ready yet, and by the way that's ok, doesn't mean others won't I was at a friends yesterday and her DC handed her just such a card from nursery and you could clearly make an E M I and a couple of Ls it didn't by any means say Emily but, others in her class will have had the whole thing written by the key worker.

But no you don't have to be worried reception writing goes from basic mark making too being able to start emergent spelling and everything inbeteeen. Also September is 6 months away your child may well start to show an interest by then.

I'm kind of with fig though you do come across as a bit nasty why is it smug to get a nice card from any one? And it doesn't really matter who's written it does it?! The mums felt it was a nice thing!

I don't actually get the over sharing on social media but you know what each to their own!!

[PennyHasNoSurname]

Dd (4 and a bit) can write Mam and her name from memory (but her own name has an M in it so that helped with the Mam), and to my surprise drew a basic flower, which I didnt know she knew how to do, but couldnt write anything more (oh she can do big Xs for kisses).

Surely they just learn at the rate they learn?

[elQuintoConyo]

I used to write messages in father's day cards to DH and pass it off (v tongue in cheek) as DS' by using my left hand

DS is 4yo, my left-handed writing and his scrawl don't look much different!

[thenewaveragebear1983]

You can help your child to develop their pencil pincer grip by pegging clothes pegs onto a piece of string using thumb and finger. You could help them with letters at the same time by writing letters or sounds (eg ph or er) on the pegs so they can 'spell' words. Never let them write with felt tips, biros or wax crayons, only pencils.

[Kennington]

Nurseries do teach this and some kids can and others cannot. In the long term it is highly unlikely your child won't be able to write.

[CalleighDoodle]

Ive never seen My ds4 write his name but apparently he has done at preschool. But he wont write at all at home. My dd at the ame sage would write over my dots. He wont.

[hollieberrie]

I teach Nursery in a school setting. Out of a 30 strong cohort, about 20 of them were able to copy their names fairly clearly into their MD cards.

About 10 wanted to have a go at writing Mummy, some were able to do this much more clearly than others but super that they wanted to have a go.

2 very able children also wrote "Happy Mothers Day" (adult modelled).

Theyre all so different and age is a big factor (autumn v summer born). Dont worry at all, they'll all be writing in the end.

[BackInTheRealWorld]

What exactly is the problem op? Is it that you are concerned that your child is behind with their writing ability, or bitter that other people's children might be ahead?