to think that this is too harsh a punishment for 5yos?

(10 Posts)
bigredtractor Fri 04-Mar-16 20:34:39

Hi - I wanted to sense check this with a few people first before I bring it up with DS's teacher. I'll also state now that I will absolutely check my facts before I bring it up - and won't be confrontational either way.

DS is 5 and in P1 (Scottish equivalent of reception). His class teacher left the school after October half term which was not ideal but hasn't proved too disruptive. A new internal appointment was made and while she seems fairly reserved - old-fashioned even - I've had good communication with her whenever necessary.

She has a bit of a reputation as a disciplinarian and a couple of parents have asked me in the playground what we think of her and whether DS has had any negative opinions of her. He hasn't and so I've kept an open mind. Anecdotally I've heard that she's strict and a bit shouty but again, I've not seen that first hand.

We had an incident this week where DS ended up on the 'cloud' for rule breaking- I'm led to believe that this is fairly standard sanctioning so hopefully you know what I mean. The kids lose 2, 4 6 or 8 mins of their golden time free play once a week, depending on how bad the behaviour has been. I have no problem with this.

DS was on the 2 mins cloud except that he told us the times have now been changed to 5, 10, 15 and 20 mins. AIBU to think that it's fairly draconian to expect a 5yo to sit doing nothing for up to 20 mins? I've asked DS whether they have to do anything while sitting out their 'cloud' time like tidying up or extra work but he said no, they sit on the carpet watching their friends play.

AIBU to think this sounds too harsh? I'm all for teaching that actions have consequences but 20 mins seems to be too long at age 5. Does anyone have similar at their school as a comparison?

Petradreaming Fri 04-Mar-16 20:36:57

20 mins is far too long for a 5 year old. Punitive and unnecessary.

AndNowItsSeven Fri 04-Mar-16 20:37:24

Yes it's far too harsh and is the sign of a poor teacher.

TrinityForce Fri 04-Mar-16 20:37:57

Ask the teacher whether it really has been changed to /x/x/x 20 minutes.

It does sound too long for 5 yo's, considering the naughty step is 1 minute (?) per year of age, 20 minutes is far too long.

But at 4 'infractions' to get to that 20 minutes I'd say the behaviour needs discussing to see what's going on.

Smartiepants79 Fri 04-Mar-16 20:38:42

What's the overall school policy?
Has it just been brought into line with the rest of the school or has it changed across the whole school?

twinkletoedelephant Fri 04-Mar-16 20:39:24

D's has ADHD and at his school they have traffic lights.... Get to red and you lose a minute of golden time.

There is always plenty of opertunity of gaining their time back (and rewards for staying on green light usually stickers)

20 minutes must seen forever for a five yr old....

Can he earn back his time??

Ds finds thus bit very important and will except the lost time and knows he has to try hard to get it back his teacher does give him a lot of leeway as he's a nightmare without running about time

bigredtractor Fri 04-Mar-16 20:42:03

I agree Trinity and I've read the positive behaviour policy tonight too. Repeat bad behaviour is mentioned and there are lots of strategies discussed. Luckily we're nowhere near (phew!).

However I'm just a bit uncomfortable generally with the balance of punishments and sanctions to rewards. I never see kids with stickers or little certificates for his class and they're both examples of how the school's policy suggests rewarding good behaviour or effort. It just feels a bit skewed towards punishing the bad - and punishing too harshly.

But like I said I WILL check my facts.

bigredtractor Fri 04-Mar-16 21:01:20

The school's policy does suggest the 5, 10, 15, 20 option for P4 upwards (so age 8+).

YouTheCat Fri 04-Mar-16 21:53:54

I never give a child more than 5 minutes time out, and that is mainly older children who might need a bit of calm-down/thinking time.

Kids of your ds's age would get a warning and then a few minutes and then a chat.

20 minutes is way too long.

MadamDeathstare Fri 04-Mar-16 21:59:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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