H who i recently separated from sent this valentines video

(65 Posts)
Theladyloriana Mon 15-Feb-16 10:09:19

https://youtu.be/CO9BvJTpR2c

I wonder what others think of this? I think it is making permissible being deeply unkind in a relationship. Or have I got the wrong end of the stick and I'm being u?

OurBlanche Mon 15-Feb-16 10:12:24

Whatever his intentions, aren't you just delighted to have got rid of him?

But yes, that is quite a video... please don't blame me for having been unpleasant, it was only because I loved you bestest!

Bless him, with a big stick grin

AnyFucker Mon 15-Feb-16 10:13:41

he's a creepy fucker, isn't he ?

Fairenuff Mon 15-Feb-16 10:16:43

It's a load of rubbish. It tries to excuse mistreatment of people we claim to love.

Fairenuff Mon 15-Feb-16 10:17:22

Was this supposed to be a valentnes gift? shock

DrGoogleWillSeeYouNow Mon 15-Feb-16 10:17:30

I got 1 minute in before I was bored as shit.

Whatever the message in the video, be grateful that you're rid of a gobshite who can't communicate like a normal person.

Theladyloriana Mon 15-Feb-16 10:19:03

It is weird isn't it. That's not normal in a relationship is it?

Maryz Mon 15-Feb-16 10:19:49

You are well rid, aren't you?

CigarsofthePharoahs Mon 15-Feb-16 10:21:16

Is he trying to say that his way of showing love is to start fights and generally be critical and nasty?
I agree with OurBlanche I also bet you're delighted to be rid of him.

DoreenLethal Mon 15-Feb-16 10:21:54

No - that truly is a video that excuses despicable behaviour.

Dig deep enough and there is an excuse for everything on the internet. It just depends on your search options.

Fairenuff Mon 15-Feb-16 10:22:59

No, not normal. Make sure you stay separated he sounds awful.

Theladyloriana Mon 15-Feb-16 10:23:19

Good points all. I wondered what he put in?! So not how others behave in relationships then?

Maryz Mon 15-Feb-16 10:23:21

I'd like to know what he was googling to find it.

Was it "how to blame your partner for everything"?

OurBlanche Mon 15-Feb-16 10:26:26

Ooh, MaryZ. That doesn't really bear thinking about shock

Sighing Mon 15-Feb-16 10:26:44

Either forgiving his own actions "because he loved you/ still does" OR he's "forgiving" your anger because he's suggesting you are still in love with him (rather than recognising his culpability).
Gross.

DoreenLethal Mon 15-Feb-16 10:27:04

So not how others behave in relationships then?

No.

We have a moan about other people, then laugh about them being <whatever> and then are nice to each other. If one of us has had a bad day and neither has the energy to cook, the other will go get a takeout.

We never shout, holler or abuse each other. Because we have mutual respect and love. We buy each other things we think the other might like. We look after each other if they are ill.

Fairenuff Mon 15-Feb-16 10:29:05

No, dh and I don't get angry with each other because of something someone else said or did. We do talk it over and offer each other a friendly ear.

TheoriginalLEM Mon 15-Feb-16 10:33:30

Phew, thank god you got rid of that twat

acasualobserver Mon 15-Feb-16 10:34:10

I thought the video contained some truths about the way relationships work. However, it's pretty clear that your ex sent it as some sort of weird rhetorical device. Perhaps he wanted to normalise the conflict in your relationship and/or excuse his part in it.

Lynnm63 Mon 15-Feb-16 10:37:02

Wow...what a catch. How did you let him slip through your fingers.
I guess he's sent you the perfect present just in case you were second guessing your decision to be separated he sends you this and now you have gold plated proof he's a dick.

DoreenLethal Mon 15-Feb-16 10:47:31

I thought the video contained some truths about the way relationships work.

Which ways in particular?

bakeoffcake Mon 15-Feb-16 10:51:16

I bet you're so glad you got rid of him. What a nasty, creepy fucker.

StuffEverywhere Mon 15-Feb-16 10:51:57

Creepy.

Ididnthearanything Mon 15-Feb-16 10:54:27

Jee what a peach.
So the fact that I shout at H is evidence of our attachment??
Maybe, if I were a TODDLER! FFfs.

It must be a relief to be separating.

acasualobserver Mon 15-Feb-16 10:58:43

Doreen

For instance, "We exaggerate our partner's powers."

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