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AIBU?

to be pissed off with would-be clients ignoring my emails?

43 replies

Gladiolis · 08/02/2016 13:52

I work as a career coach and offer potential clients a free 30 minutes by phone to assess whether they'd like to proceed.
I'm not new to this, it's been my work for a decade.

I'm just pissed off with a couple who said they wanted to go ahead, I booked them slots and emailed them the days and time to confirm, and they have ignored the emails. Under no circumstances do I do any sales pitch or coerce them to proceed, in fact I ask them if they want to think about it and get back to me in a day or two.

And they don't even have the decency to say they have changed their minds. These are highly educated people and business owners. It's just so discourteous and seems to be happening more. Why?

OP posts:
slebmum1 · 08/02/2016 13:53

Because they're busy? They forgot?

LonerDave · 08/02/2016 13:54

Because they are fucking rude

Hihohoho1 · 08/02/2016 13:54

Perils of running your own business op.

I do and have time wasters and wankers galore. Goes with the territory but yes a annoying.

AliceInUnderpants · 08/02/2016 13:56

Maybe they don't regularly check emails? When did you email?

LonerDave · 08/02/2016 13:56

Educated business people etc would have good diary / time keeping (especially if they have an EA/PA)

They are just rude ... and hate to say it, as it's free they think are losing nothing.

Not teaching you to suck eggs, but life coaching takes commitment so could you potentially offer the "free" part at the end

ridemesideways · 08/02/2016 13:57

Give them a call. Though some people are just tres rude. I'm in a similar role and was kept waiting during a recent evening appointment by the husband, who was faffing around for ages at the beginning with work stuff. Had the audacity to make comments about going to bed when we over-ran as a result.

LonerDave · 08/02/2016 13:58

Alice .... If they are business owners they would likely be checking emails very regularly

OP - assuming that the emails are not going into junk folders and getting through some tight firewalls??

WickedWax · 08/02/2016 14:01

I'm guessing because it's free they're thinking there's no real commitment, they're losing nothing and in their mind you're losing nothing if they don't show up.

WMittens · 08/02/2016 14:03

Educated business people etc would have good diary / time keeping

Unless that's a weak skill area for them. Maybe they thought, "I'm a bit shit at prioritising my workload, maybe I'll hire a career coach!"

Alice .... If they are business owners they would likely be checking emails very regularly

That doesn't mean they action them straight away. Maybe they have what they consider to be more urgent missives to attend to.

LurkingHusband · 08/02/2016 14:09

I'm not new to this, it's been my work for a decade

Sorry, but that doesn't square with your grumble Grin

I'm not an HR or careers professional, yet I have seen enough over the years to know that in any group of 10 people, the chances of all 10 actually completing the steps necessary to move ahead with something are very small. Certainly I've had people simply not turn up to interviews - despite accepting by phone and email.

Best one was someone who got the job ! When they didn't turn up Monday morning, a call to the agency revealed they'd "changed their mind" (this was 2008).

Marniasmum · 08/02/2016 14:09

If they are highly educated business owners, do they need a career coach? They have clearly chosen and invested in a career and if they need advice it will surely be advice specific to their business.

Marniasmum · 08/02/2016 14:10

Ps I think they are just too polite to tell you to bog off tbh

SisterMoonshine · 08/02/2016 14:20

So they're already booked in and you're emailing them a confirmation... and you want a confirmation that they've received the confirmation email?

Gladiolis · 08/02/2016 14:22

If they are highly educated business owners, do they need a career coach? They have clearly chosen and invested in a career and if they need advice it will surely be advice specific to their business.

Wrong! Some of my best clients are CEOs and directors of top companies . The come for all sorts- NLP coaching, change of career in their 40s and 50s, work-life balance etc. Coaches are not 'business advisors'.

Anyway- that's all by the by. Not here to defend coaching or why people use it.

The point is we make a verbal agreement, by phone, on a day and time to meet for the start of their coaching , or they agree wholeheartedly to go ahead and I say I will send a selection of days and times for the coming week - then they have to confirm.

They are not being polite to ignore- they are being downright rude and cowardly. I don't even need to know why they have changed their minds, just that they no longer want the provisional dates so I can then release that time to another client.

OP posts:
KitKat1985 · 08/02/2016 14:25

I hate to be the one to say but I agree with Marinasmum in that they probably weren't ever that interested in the first place but just agreed to it just to end the conversation but never had any intention of following it up. I'm afraid that to me personally 'career coach' summons up images of David Brent style motivational speaking seminars and as such an expensive waste of time, and I suspect that I'm not alone in that thinking (I'm not saying that's what you do OP, it's just that would be the first image that pops in my head).

WorraLiberty · 08/02/2016 14:25

Who approached who originally?

Gladiolis · 08/02/2016 14:25

No sister.

We have agreed they will proceed (verbally) and I have said that I will email them a few different session times so they can choose. (Don't forget that I have many clients and could be waiting for Client A to confirm before new Client B chooses their day / time.)

So- I email them say on Friday- choose from Weds, Thursday and Friday next week at XXX times.

By Monday they have not replied. By Tuesday they are sent a reminder email or a text to ask them to confirm, They ignore and never contact me again.

Who needs idiots like this?

OP posts:
leelu66 · 08/02/2016 14:27

Marniasmum

If they are highly educated business owners, do they need a career coach?

Presumably they do, as they contacted OP and had a 30 minute phone session with her. No one forced them to do this, did they? Hmm

Ps I think they are just too polite to tell you to bog off tbh

Sigh. It's not 'too polite' to fail to get back to someone. It's rude. 'Too polite' would have been a protracted apology for not wanting to go ahead.

Why do people make excuses for rude idiots? Confused

sephineee · 08/02/2016 14:27

We've seen the number of people not turn up for interviews rise a lot recently. Very odd.

I think manners are on the decline overall!

goodnightdarthvader1 · 08/02/2016 14:28

Small biz owner here. Happens all the time. You quote, you get ignored. You send files for sign off, you get ignored. You send invoices, you get ignored (worst of all!)

People are busy and thoughtless. It's frustrating, but you have to grit your teeth. Smile and wave, boys ... smile and wave.

WickedWax · 08/02/2016 14:28

Ah, they haven't even confirmed a day/time.

I think you probably just need to take the hint that they're not interested.

Gladiolis · 08/02/2016 14:30

Kitkat- please read what was written.

As it happens, I am always the one to end the conversations- they'd talk for England. I can't divulge the content of conversations here but please accept that no client is ever put any pressure to proceed.

I also think you are a bit out of order questioning the whole nature and ethics of coaching when you know nothing about it. Clients come to me through choice believe it or not!

I've done this for 10 years and work within a strict code of ethics of the Association for Coaching

OP posts:

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LurkingHusband · 08/02/2016 14:31

We've seen the number of people not turn up for interviews rise a lot recently. Very odd

It does rather cause one to question the "no jobs" permatruth which is often spun in some circles.

A bit like the "there's no work around" from builders - right up until you actually try and get one to quote. Again the 2/10 (in this case 2/3) rule applied, and 2 never showed. Despite confirming the appointment on the phone on the day in question.

purplepandas · 08/02/2016 14:32

I am not in your business but am getting the lack of email reply thing from someone at work at the moment too and it is making v cross. It's about one issue they are ignoring me (waiting on an outcome for something submitted in May 2015). They just ignore my emails and I am so cross as it is beyond rude and unprofessional. Will reply to emails about other issues. I don't know why people behave like this, it is not hard to be polite and courteous.

Gladiolis · 08/02/2016 14:32

I think you probably just need to take the hint that they're not interested.

hints are rude behaviour. All that is required is a quick email saying they have had 2nd thoughts and do not want to go ahead, but thanks.

OP posts:
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