to not understand people getting upset over people they don't know?

(139 Posts)
FarterChristmoose Tue 12-Jan-16 15:18:50

Good friend, bowie fan, started crying when she heard he died,says she will miss him so much. Eh? She never met him, never even saw him at a concert. Facebook shows she's not alone in her, erm ,grief.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Tue 12-Jan-16 15:20:41

There was a thread yesterday with people expressing why they are allowed to have been very emotional regarding his death, look it up, it's on page 2 currently.

SpikeWithoutASoul Tue 12-Jan-16 15:23:25

It's grief for a part of your life. Perhaps his songs were important to her as a teenager. Perhaps her father introduced her to his music and so Bowie represents special shared memories with him. It's sadness for the end of an era.

I'm not a fan at all, I like terrible cheesy pop music, but it doesn't take much imagination to see how other people don't feel the same as me.

SpaggyBollocks Tue 12-Jan-16 15:26:07

I get that people often have very strong emotional connections to artists whose work affected them. perhaps Bowie gave them the confidence to come out as gay, for example.

and maybe I do have a heart of stone, but I have to say I am with you on this one, op.

everything he did, his music and his legacy, that still exists. it's not gone because he is. the only thing that's gone is the person, and you didn't know him.

lazyarse123 Tue 12-Jan-16 15:26:29

It's very sad when anyone dies especially from something as horrible as cancer, but i don't understand all this stuff on fb, YOU DON'T KNOW THESE PEOPLE STOP ACTING AS IF YOU DO.

ThroughThickAndThin01 Tue 12-Jan-16 15:27:11

I can totally understand why some people are upset over the death of an iconic person.

treaclesoda Tue 12-Jan-16 15:30:26

I think as a previous poster says, the thing with a musician is that music can really resonate with people. You can listen to lyrics and find that a complete stranger has put your feelings into words better than you could ever do yourself. His back catalogue will always be there but there is a sadness that there will never be any more new work to release. I don't generally 'get' people being upset by a celebrity dying but in this case I sort of do...

Hackedoff87 Tue 12-Jan-16 15:30:38

I have to say I don't get it much either.

I felt very upset when Amy Winehouse died, I used to listen to her album Frank at poignant times in my life. I loved her music and her as an artist. However, although it came as a real shock to hear that she'd died and I was upset, I didn't sit there in floods of tears.

I did however cry when a girl from the next village to me, whom I knew of growing up got murdered on holiday last year. When I heard the news, I dropped the cup of tea I was making and half an hour later shed some tears. Her case is/ was horrific and although I hadn't spoken to, or even seen her in years, I knew her at one stage and that, coupled with the brutality of her death and what her family must be going through, led me to shed a few tears.

At the end of the day, people will feel sad at the passing of someone they loved, even from afar. But to sit their in tears and keep bursting into tears (like some of the posters on the other thread said they did) to me is a little odd. I would burst into tears constantly if one of my friends or family died, not a musical artist whom I'd never met.

Hey ho, each to their own.

PrimalLass Tue 12-Jan-16 15:32:00

It is funny how random people can 'touch' you. I got really emotional about Cory Monteith's death and went on a huge Glee binge. It was just such a waste. <slinks off with no credibility>

Hackedoff87 Tue 12-Jan-16 15:32:00

there**

treaclesoda Tue 12-Jan-16 15:34:51

But there are all sorts of reasons why someone could burst into tears over something seemingly trivial. Eg my father is terminally ill, so the news of an almost 70 year old dying surrounded by his family, as we hear that Bowie did, is brutally real to me, because it's a reality in my life at present. Whereas maybe if I'd heard this news a year ago I'd have shrugged, thought 'oh, that's sad' and barely given it another thought. Emotions are so complex.

squoosh Tue 12-Jan-16 15:37:59

Whatever.

I don't understand people who don't get why some people can be hugely upset over the death of an artist who meant a lot to them. For some people David Bowie has been soundtracking their lives for the past 40 years or so. They have an emotional attachment to him.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Tue 12-Jan-16 15:40:25

I cried when Diana died, ds2 was six weeks old at the time so I'll blame hormones as usually I'm stoic and keep the tears under control.

DoreenLethal Tue 12-Jan-16 15:40:50

Bowie was like breathing - always there and suddenly one day you were aware of him. Now he isn't.

One day perhaps you might be affected by someone that is not in your inner circle. And that you might be gutted that they have died. Strange that so many people are so cold about other people having feelings. So what does that say about you exactly?

x2boys Tue 12-Jan-16 15:44:56

I don't understand it either it's always a bit shocking when celebritys die but I don't know them son, not going to get upset about them.

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe Tue 12-Jan-16 15:49:08

I have shed a tear over many a person I have never met.

Bowie has been the first famous person, because his music means a lot to me, but I have cried while watching the news and reading papers, I sometimes cry for people on MN too when they are suffering.

I wouldn't want to live in the world where our lives are only touched by those we have physically met, and where we can't feel sadness for those who are suffering or have passed if we don't personally know them.

Jasonandyawegunorts Tue 12-Jan-16 15:49:59

He and his music meant a lot to people. Much of it is intertwind with their lives and people they did know and love...

It's not that hard to understand how people get upset about these thing.

Jasonandyawegunorts Tue 12-Jan-16 15:51:44

to not understand people getting upset over people they don't know?

Empathy.

OnlyLovers Tue 12-Jan-16 15:53:29

Oh God, this again?

Some journalist tweeted yesterday that people mourning Bowie should 'man the fuck up' (or maybe 'man the fuck up') and said she didn't think people who said they were crying over it really were. Charming.

I agree with Elsa: 'I wouldn't want to live in a world where our lives are only touched by those we have physically met, and where we can't feel sadness for those who are suffering or have passed if we don't personally know them.'

If you can't understand this I think you're suffering from a serious case of lack of imagination, at best.

cjt110 Tue 12-Jan-16 15:55:27

I was surprised when I heard he had died. I didn't think much more about it.

I personally think it's a bit insulting and macabre for all these outpourings on social media about how "devastated" they are about his death.

No you're not. His son, daughter, wife, parents are. You are just upset.

ExitPursuedByABear Tue 12-Jan-16 15:56:00

Each to their own.

I shed quite a few tears over Bowie's death.

<shrug>

shazzarooney99 Tue 12-Jan-16 15:58:15

I cried when Dunblane happened, i cried for a few weeks after that actually,maybe your not just human op!

squoosh Tue 12-Jan-16 15:58:34

His parents are a long time dead.

SomebodySedateMe Tue 12-Jan-16 15:59:08

His music has always been a connection to lost loved ones. Last night dh and I broke out the vinyl to play to our baby bump and I shed more than a few tears.

In future would you like me to contact you and check that my emotions are valid?

polyhymnia Tue 12-Jan-16 15:59:12

It's what I call the Diana syndrome. I remember being amazed at people hysterically grieving for someone they'd never met. With someone like Bowie though I do think I get the 'soundtrack to people's lives' point, even if I wouldn't personally shed tears.

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