To do this for my big birthday?

[Lovestosing]

I will be 40 next year, and we are having major works done to our house and also two big trips abroad so we can't afford to have a big party. I would, however like to do something to mark the occasion. I have finally come up with an "open house" idea, say from midday till late, where people can come any time, stay however long they want and then go home. I will provide food, but nothing huge, so sandwiches, tea, cake and booze. I will also ask some people who are very close to me to make or bring something to add to the food; I know they won't mind, and as I always do this for them I know it won't be a problem. DH however thinks this is unacceptable; he thinks we can't ask people to come a long way for anything less than a sit down meal. I have said I would make the food arrangements clear on the invitation so people have the option of declining to come if they think it's too much effort. AIBU?

[rosebiggs]

Sounds fab!

[FlopIsMyChristmasGuru]

Sounds ace. I'd much rather not have a sit down meal if travelling as it's an added stress to get there on time. Besides - your birthday your choice

[venusinscorpio]

So it's basically a party with afternoon tea and a buffet? Sounds perfectly reasonable to me.

[PingpongDingDong]

Do it! We've done this a lot for various occasions and it's worked very well. The only thing that can be tricky is judging how much food/drink you're likely to need if the open house lasts a long time. Also it can be quite tiring!

[HackerFucker22]

As long as you are clear then all is fine.

I go anywhere for cake and wine

[Lovestosing]

Thank you, I have been worrying, I thought the more informal it is, the better but DH has also said that if people have kids they will want them to have a proper dinner, which is weird as I wouldn't expect that for our DC.

[January87]

It's your birthday you do what you want.

[JE1234]

It sounds good to me. We have done similar in the past as I like low key dos. People will have fun regardless of whether you do a sit down meal, you are still feeding and watering them.

[Lovestosing]

It is, but the buffet would all be home made, so nothing fancy and not in abundance, that's the worry! Plenty of wine and bubbles though, I'm already stocking up on that!

[AwfulBeryl]

Sounds perfect to me, I would be happy to bring a bit of food and drink to a friends party if I got to spend a happy occasion with them.

[BackInTheRealWorld]

I much prefer informal parties like the one you are suggesting.
What shall I bring?

[DurhamDurham]

You're braver than me, I'd hate the idea of friends and family being able to pop in at any time.......I'm more into fun and parties in a very structured time limited type of way.
My teen girls call me Monica and I don't think they are being entirely affectionate

[Lovestosing]

I feel so reassured, thank you! Those of you who have done this before; what time did you give on the invitation? We have young DC so I don't want it to be too late.

[JE1234]

We did ours from about 2 until 10. I intended it to be shorter but people can be hard to shift after a drink. Most people had turned up by 3/4 and about two thirds stayed to the end. Those that didn't left between 7 and 9 to put babies and toddlers up bed.

[Lovestosing]

Ah, but I'll be drinking so I doubt I'll care! And pavlova sounds good!

[Postitblue]

Sounds grand! BYOB /cake is a winner in my books

[Plasticbagpandas]

Sounds great to me. We did this for my friends birthday and it worked really well.
We did hers from 2 till 9 on the invite. The last guests left at 10. The people with young kids came earlier and left around 6-8 whereas the guests without young kids came later and stayed to the end.
My friend really enjoyed it.

[sidsgranny]

Sounds perfect to me! What time of year is it?

[ClashCityRocker]

Yes!! It was only on Mumsnet that I learnt that most parties aren't a byob pot luck supper type affair I don't get out much

2pm is a good time to start ime - anything much later and becomes more of an 'evening' do dynamic

[Lovestosing]

2 - 9 sounds good to me, it will be in April so it will be an indoors thins unfortunately!

[ladygracie]

I think it sounds fab. If people are bothered about feeding their children then they will time when they come to fit in with that.

[MoMoTy]

I think it's a great idea, and mostly because people can pop over when it's convenient for them.

[RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie]

Sounds perfect. I'd be inclined to go for sarnies and crisps and then have a couple of slow cookers, one with a curry and one with a chilli, for later - with a load of French bread and some salad. Cake. Coffee and tea. Booze. Bob's yer uncle.

[whois]

Yeah but don't ask everyone to BYOB or bring a dish, it's your birthday and you are hosting so you really should provide the food and booze!

[SeaCabbage]

Make sure you put on the invitation when the party finishes! Otherwise you may find it going on forever. I too have had an all dayer and it was knackering. And that was in my 20s.