AIBU to demand to change midwife center?

[Pregasaurusrex]

Without outing myself. I am in the early stages of pregnancy and have been refered to the Midwife unit. Lovely. Slight fly in the ointment- this unit is attached to my place of work, shares a reception, and is often used for meetings. I've had a voicemail letting me know that my pregnancy pack is waiting for me ( in the reception of work)! It is my first pregnancy, I don't want people to know yet, and I really want my pregnancy pack! I know it's probably not exciting- but I want it!!! AIBU to change midwives?

[Gazelda]

I don't see why you can't request to change. I'm sure they'll understand and be accommodating if possible.
Congratulations!

[Pregasaurusrex]

I have already requested. It seemed to be a situation they had not come across before. Nice use of passive aggressive italics by the way....

[MrEverything]

YANBU. If they haven't come across it before, perhaps ask someone higher up? I doubt they will be obstructive, just NHS and it's bloody red tape, as I'm sure you well know.

[mayhew]

Can you pop in or call the midwives? They might be able to give you a pack and/or do your first appointment elsewhere.

There is usually only one mw appt in early pregnancy to book you in and then they don't see you again until 16 weeks, by which time you might have told work. And it will be really handy to have the service on your doorstep.

[BumWad]

Yikes YANBU.

I hid my pregnancy from work until 21 weeks!

Good luck

[Pregasaurusrex]

Hilariously, I called the midwives earlier before thinking. It was only when I heard our receptionists name and voice that I realised that I had actually rang my own place of work. From the next room! I wonder if I could sneak in and find my pack on her desk? Could try ringing my DR again I suppose?

[Micah]

Presumably your pack will have your name on it?

So either it's in an envelope like your normal mail, or it's clear what it is. So go and get it.

In any case, the receptionist is bound by confidentiality, since you are a patient. Even if she has seen the pack, or you go and get it from her, a gentle reminder that it's not general knowledge and she should be capable of not saying anything.

It's extremely common in the nhs to come across colleagues as patients. It's not gossip and should be dealt with appropriately.

YABU.

[Gazelda]

Hang on. I thought I was posting something nice and helpful. I'm on your side OP! Sorry if my italics came across PA, I just wanted to point out to you that 'demand' wouldn't necessarily be the best approach. And I wasn't to know that you've already 'requested'.
Hope all goes well.

[Pregasaurusrex]

It's difficult to explain without giving too much away. I am not a DR, Nurse or any other medical professional. Rather I am in the top senior position in an educational setting, which is connected to a midwife unit. The consequences of my pregnancy being common knowledge, would be detrimental to a community. This reception is filled with staff, parents and children. Surely I am entitled to keep my pregnancy quiet for as long as I choose and not worry about being overheard?

[StellaAlpina]

I think I know the type of setting you mean, in your situation I don't think they should have any problem letting you move.

Personally, if you get the choice I would find it more convenient to find a midwife attached to a GPs instead...can get prescriptions, drop off wee etc. at the same time.

[SquinkiesRule]

You are entitled to privacy and not wanting to let all and sundry know your business so early on. Watch and wait for the receptionist to go to the loo and go get your package on the quiet.
Then call higher up the food chain and get switched to a different MW.

[MatildaTheCat]

Hi, former midwife here from a busy unit where many members of staff from all levels booked to have their babies. I suggest you speak confidentially to the Team Leader for Antenatal care and ask for her help. She will be able to arrange for you to have any appointments and scans done discreetly as far as possible.

I'm racking my brains trying to work out why news of your pregnancy would be detrimental to a whole community . However, of course you are entitled to confidentiality just like anyone else and it's quite possible to arrange it.

Hint, several people used a different surname to their usual work name ie used their maiden name or married name if not usually known by this.

Good luck.

[Pseudonym99]

Sounds like a breach of patient confidentiality to me.

[Pregasaurusrex]

Ha! It does make me sound rather self important. Rather I mean, we have just gained community confidence within a historically tricky place. Until my replacement and or my ducks are in a row- it really would set us back! Am going to go in early tomorrow for a sneaky rummage on the receptionists desk- thankfully it is in my married name- so might just get away with it! Thank you for all your help and advice!

[Pseudonym99]

Surely your GP would have asked for your consent before passing your information on to this organisation?

[CurlyBlueberry]

Well I think YANBU actually. Maybe it's because I live in London and had a choice of a few hospitals, but the idea of choosing your hospital seems completely normal to me! I do happen to work in a hospital and chose to book in at that same hospital for convenience but there was little chance of bumping into a colleague (I work for the university part). A colleague of mine booked into a different hospital as she didn't want to risk people at work knowing too soon, totally understandable.

[SummerNights1986]

People who demand things rarely get them IME.

If you've already 'requested' a move and been declined, what reasons did they give you?