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AIBU?

Was I bad parent or was driver rude?

17 replies

Nofunkingworriesmate · 07/10/2015 21:24

I commute everyday with small child in buggy. Most Bus drivers know me so I usually wave and get on the bus at the back doors ( after people get off ) a few drivers even indicate that they want me to get on that way and open doors and lower bus for me.
Today I got on usual way ( it was a new driver I hadn't seen before) but this time back doors closed on me, I call out, and they are opened, she calls me forward and tells me off for what seems like a long time for putting daughter in danger and rants for ages. (Dd totally un touched) I'm embarrassed but keep nodding and saying ok yes.bus stops for drivers to change over and she goes into a triade to the new driver about how some people are so stupid and how I had a small child really ranting about my stupid/bad mother and reinacting at the front of the bus fully aware I was two seats behind. As she did have a point ( and I'm usually v passive in these situations ) I let it go for a bit then went up and said excuse me ( I was ignored 3 times even when I tapped her on shoulder) I then asked her to slag me off less loudly and sorry she had had a bad day but no need to humiliate me in front of everyone. She got off but continued to mouth off in bus doorway so I got up and said " I've asked you politely to stop slagging me off" bit more upset this time
What would you have done. what do you do in similar situations?

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plantsitter · 07/10/2015 21:28

Ignore - or report her. She was presumably overdoing it because she knew she should've checked the mirror /cctv properly before shutting the door!

No doubt people will come on this thread and make you feel like the most inconsiderate, feckless, annoying type of person ever, but, really you were just getting on with your day

(Btw, in your position I would probably have got really angry with her but it's really not wirth it as it ruins your day - better if you can let this things roll off you!)

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theycallmemellojello · 07/10/2015 21:28

Sorry you experienced that. She was a crazy person, no point in trying to rationalise her actions. Try not to give it any more thought.

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Fuckitfay · 07/10/2015 21:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fuckitfay · 07/10/2015 21:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MsJamieFraser · 07/10/2015 21:31

I would report her, she should not be doing this full stop never mind in front of a bus full of customers!

REPORT!

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MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 07/10/2015 21:32

What would I do? I'd contact the duty manager at the depot and have her arse.

What a rude and stupid woman.

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Nofunkingworriesmate · 07/10/2015 21:33

Thanks y'all usually I'm really hard on myself in conflict situations and this was rare time I was assertive but doubted myself (as I sat with my face burning with anger upset)

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londonrach · 07/10/2015 21:34

Report to bus company.

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Gileswithachainsaw · 07/10/2015 21:37

definately complain and report.

if there are two sets of doors she should check both sets of doors.

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cdtaylornats · 07/10/2015 21:58

If you report her they will crack down, enforce the rules and you will end up always using the front door

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YesICanHearYouClemFandango · 07/10/2015 22:08

What a bitch. I would probably have burst into tears so well done for what you said to her! I think you should report her, too. She can't go around behaving like that, never mind in a professional capacity. She has no idea what kind of day you've had or what's going on in your life. It could be enough to tip someone vulnerable over the edge.

I agree that she was embarrassed and trying to distract from her mistake. Something similar happened to DP recently - he was starting to cross with the pushchair at a zebra crossing, the car on his side had already stopped, but the car coming the other way didn't notice him on the crossing and slammed the brakes on just before she got to it. Obviously he wasn't going to keep walking unless she had stopped, but the driver launched into a torrent of abuse about what a shit parent he must be. DP walked away but he was pretty upset. Understandably.

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MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 07/10/2015 22:12

Actually in London you are supposed to use the back doors cd. Many buses don't have enough room to even get a Maclaren down the aisle.

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CocktailQueen · 07/10/2015 22:15

Are you not meant to get on through the back doors? If so, yabu.

If you are meant to get on through the back doors, then possibly yanbu. She was certainly rude and could do with a lesson in customer service - but it sounds like you scared her and she wasn't checking those mirrors and didn't expect you to come in through those doors.

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BoomBoomsCousin · 07/10/2015 23:32

Actually Moving in London you are meant to get on most buses through the front door if you have a single buggy and the back door if you have a double, but only after checking with the driver first (tfl.gov.uk/transport-accessibility/pregnant-women-and-pushchairs).

In practice most drivers are fine with the back door and on the Boris Buses anyone can board anywhere.

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MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 07/10/2015 23:41

Well that's just not possible on most of the buses serving the suburbs. I have an original Bugaboo bee so it's narrow but it just won't go down the aisle folded or otherwise on about 80% of buses. I know this because I prefer to get on at the front and used to get stuck!

I do agree with checking with the driver which is what I've always done but that hasn't stopped me being shut in doors getting on or off Hmm A friend had the driver go with her still on the pavement and buggy with baby inside!

I expect the person who wrote that webpage has not checked the facts or they wouldn't have written it. I know of very few buses a Bugaboo Chamelon can get on via front doors and that's definitely a single buggy.

We don't get Boris buses in the burbs.

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AccidentalNameChange · 07/10/2015 23:46

She over-reacted ridiculously. YWNU.

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CheesyDibbles · 08/10/2015 09:37

Report her. Make a formal complaint in writing - if you just do it over the phone it will get dismissed. It's her responsibility to make sure that everyone is on board safely - that's what she has mirrors for. What if you had been an elderly person? Or in a wheelchair? Or pregnant?

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