AIBU to think young girls shouldn't have to be skinny?

[Pseudo341]

DD5 is 5 and is what you would describe as a "big child", always at the top end of all the growth charts and a few sizes up in clothes from her age.

Ever since she moved into age 2-3 years clothes (shortly after her 1st birthday) all the trousers are designed to be skinny fit and simply won't fit her. I used to be able to get away with boys trousers but now she's in age 7 clothes they all seem to be tight too, I can't get anything to fit.

It appears I'm now faced with the possibility of having to buy even bigger size trousers and taking the legs up because there's only so many layers of rolls you can manage in the bottoms before they become uncomfortable and look absurd.

She's literally a head taller than some of her classmates, she's not overweight (consultant paediatrician she's seen for years for unrelated issue confirms this). She eats healthily and gets plenty of excercise, she's just got a bit of meat on her.

I appreciate lots of children are naturally thin but there seems to be this assumption that that's how they should be. We seem to be finally getting to grips with the idea that some adults naturally have a bigger build then others, why can't it apply to kids? She's just genetically predisposed to be big and I expect will always carry a bit of weight on her. Why is there anything wrong with that?

In case anyone thinks I have anything against those who are naturally thin, I'm a life long natural stick insect, madam has inherited her size from her Dad's side.

[PrincessHairyMclary]

My DD 5 is very tall, in 8-9 she is in the middle of the healthy weight but due to lots of dancing has quite muscular legs and we have a similar problem with trousers.

I can rarely find jeans in supermarkets, or next that fit as they all tend to be skinny fit. Debenhams do some nice boot cut ones but I generally buy them from Fat Face and Polarn Pyret in the sales.

[moonfacebaby]

I find the exact opposite - all waists are massive on my kids & it drives me potty. It's becoming even more problematic as DD1 gets older as some shops stop doing the elasticated adjustable waistband. My DD2 is only 3 but in age 5 clothes, as she's really tall & the waists are always really big on her.

Sorry, that's not remotely helpful...

[Birdsgottafly]

I feel your pain, my first DD was tiny, still is at 30, my youngest was very Solid built, still is at 17, but carrying no body fat.

She won't have to "carry a bit of weight on her", if you mean body fat, that's a harmful POV.

But if you mean that she will never be small framed, then I agree.

I'm petite, but have big hips, which means I have to pay out for jeans that fit.

[Gileswithachainsaw]

It's not just you. Dd is pretty skinny however I find with skinny jeans she can't even pull the bottoms of the legs over her ankle

la redoute do a couple of pairs that aren't skinny jeans and I just bought some nice flared ones from sainsbury (tu now online) although not sure what size they go up to as I only got age 5.

I find clothes ridiculous these days tbh. proportions are all out. Dd is nearly 9 and age 6 shorts in next were falling off her she's by no means abnormally small fir her age.

[Pseudo341]

moonfacebaby it's always helpful to hear you're not the only one with a problem, even if it's in the opposite direction it's still the same problem. I think it's easier to take the bottoms up on trousers than it is to take the waist in though so actually maybe I should stop whinging :)

PrincessHairyMaclary thanks, I hadn't had much success with googling "plus fit children's clothes", I shall investigate those brands.

[Spartans]

Kids don't have to be skinny.

I have a skinny kid and a less so skinny kid. I have struggled to get cloths to fit either of them.

Not sure where you are shopping but I don't have any skinny for jeans for my kids (4 and 11) so there are places you can buy non skinny fit.

I am a healthy weight but have quite a big behind in comparison to the rest of me. Some cut of jeans just don't fit me, so I don't buy them.

[Pseudo341]

"She won't have to "carry a bit of weight on her", if you mean body fat, that's a harmful POV."

Why is that harmful? Some of it is fat, it's not just bone structure. What's wrong with having a bit of fat? Not everyone is pure lean muscle. Not being confrontational, just genuinely confused.

[QuintShhhhhh]

My son is 10 and skinny. He is very active, like a Duracell rabbit, but with a very small appetite. He does gymnastics and plays football, and is as tall as he should be for his age. He can easily wear size 7/8 t shirts and shorts - he does not mind that these are a bit short.

Trousers are difficult.
By the time the trousers are long enough I have to take them so much in at the waist that they balloon out over his hips and bum, and needless to say the shape just dont fit him, he looks like an apple around his belly and bottom.

Children come in all sort of shapes and clothes rarely match reality.

[bikeandrun]

where are you shopping, my children both have the opposite problem. I have just had to cut the age 8 tags out my daughter new school skirts ( from Asda) in case any one sees them when she is getting changed for PE. She is off to secondary school, 12 in Jan.

[JemimaMuddledUp]

I just wish children's clothing came in a range of lengths and waist sizes rather than ages.

I have 2 long legged skinny DC, who are a nightmare to buy clothes for. Both tend to live in shorts as it is just easier than trying to find trousers with waists small enough and legs long enough. At least DD has the advantage over DS1 in that she can wear tights under them in the winter.

I also have a stockier DS, who is easier to find clothes for. He appears to be "average" sized.

Children come in different shapes and sizes, some are naturally tall and thing, others are shorter and stockier. It doesn't necessarily mean any health problem. Age sizes are just plain silly IMO, you only have to look at any group of same aged friends to see that age and size do not directly correlate. DD is 9 and has the same size feet as her 14 year old cousin - imagine how silly it would be if shoe sizes went by age?

[BrandNewAndImproved]

Op I don't mean this is any other way then helpful and please don't get offended.

The dc my dc have grown up with through school that were a bit chubby seemed to of kept putting weight on instead of shooting up and leaving their baby fat behind, its gone with them and they've got bigger.

Maybe you could put her into a couple of active clubs like swimming and martial arts for example and have a few bike rides/roller skate days. It winkle harder to shift the older she gets.

[titchy]

It's a dangerous POV because it's wrong. No one is genetically predisposed to have extra layers of fat. Genetically disposed to being taller with a bigger skeletal frame, yes. But extra fat is there because not enough calories are being burnt, or too many calories are being consumed.

[Thefitfatty]

Skinny jeans are the problem here. Blame skinny jeans. They need to go.

[murphys]

I also have one on each end of the scale. Ds is so skinny that I always had to find him adjustable waist trousers. Now as a teenager, that is not an option, but I have managed to find school trousers from a certain supplier that cater for slim fit and the only jeans that we can find that fit him well are Gap or Levis.

My dd, isn't fat at all, but is very muscular. She dances too and her legs are very muscular. She gets quite depressed when trying to find jeans. The skinny ones (which is about all the you can find these days) are so tight that she can get them past her legs, we ended up getting her a ladies size, but they are high in the waist. So she wearing leggings and skirts/dresses mostly. She also battles with boots, cant do them up over her calves. She has a beautiful figure, but we just cannot find clothes that are aimed for a 13 year old with some shape.

Its very frustrating.

[Loafliner]

I have two very skinny kids and find buying bottoms a complete nightmare - they have skinny feet so you can add nightmare shoe shopping to the list. Dd is twelve and has just grown out of her aged 5 shorts! Waist size with various lengths would help.

[addictedtosugar]

Yes please to waist/leg style sizing for clothes - tho it would make buying clothes for other kids harder. We too have the opposite problem. Can I suggest, from what is to be avoided at all costs, a careful I okmat tesco. The none elasticated waist stuff seems massive in some styles.

[TurnOffTheTv]

BikeandRun I have the same problem with my girls. My 15yo is in a age 9 skirt because her age range are enormous, totally swamp her.

[Pseudo341]

BrandNewAndImproved I'm not at all offended. She's absolutely fine as she is, she's just not skinny. There is a genetic predisposition to be be overweight so we're making a point of getting her into good habits with diet and excercise now so she'll be used to a healthy lifestyle as she gets older. We're aware it's a possibility and we've got an eye on it. Paediatrician says she's fine, just be wary of letting her eat loads of carbs. She would eat a lot more if we let her.

[BathshebaDarkstone]

I thought I had problems with DD being just a few months ahead of shop sizes (she'll be 8 in September but she's been too big for age 7-8 since about May), I seem to be quite lucky! She only has one pair of trousers, for school, she also has school pinafores, the rest of the time she's in leggings or dresses. Consequently I haven't noticed a problem with trousers. I'll have a good look next time I'm clothes shopping.

[Todayisnottheday]

My eldest was like this, solid with a little bit of body fat. She was always active, various sports clubs etc and we didn't even own a TV so no sedentary lifestyle to blame.

She's now 20yo, 6ft and built like a stick. She has to eat carefully to keep weight on. At some point her metabolism changed and so did her body.

I don't think you can be complacent but keeping an honest eye on eating and exercise habits gives a better idea than just looking at clothes sizes.

Two other dc have always been bean poles but other dd carries weight and doesn't exercise enough these days. That worries me - but she's an adult now and it's her choice.

[BrandNewAndImproved]

Good op, anyway don't go by shop sizes I have a beanpole dd who's 9 and a half and in 11 to 12 and a 8 yr old ds who's a size down because of his short legs.

[Pseudo341]

I think a large part of the problem is that her height is in her body rather than her legs whereas clothes manufacturers seem to assume that tall people have longer legs. As a baby she always outgrew the popper bottom vests way before anything else. Also dietry issues give her a bloated tummy a lot which really doesn't help. I think I've found some promising looking wider fit jeans now. Just annoyed that I've got to shell out extra money for special brand clothes.

[Mistigri]

Some people are genetically predisposed to having larger appetites and/or gaining fat more easily than others, but that doesn't mean that carrying extra weight is healthy. I do think that a child who struggles to fit into standard UK sizes for their height is probably a bit chubby - sorry. It's not as of UK sizes were slim cut on the whole - in fact for my completely average DS, it's hard to find UK clothing that doesn't swamp him.

That said, this isn't a big cause for concern at 5 assuming a sensible amount of exercise, some portion control and a watchful parental eye, but it's very easy for a bit of padding on a young child to turn into a chronic overweight problem by the time the child is 8 or 9. I have a friend who is battling with this with her nearly 10 year old. Her doctors have always said she was fine and would grow into her weight ... Until she didn't.

[ManorGreyhound]

This thread is really upsetting, there is absolutely no reason for DCs to be 'stocky' 'genetically predisposed to be big' or any other euphemisms for being fat. - this whole idea has been thoroughly debunked.

Parents really need to take more responsibility for the size of their DCs.

[WyrdByrd]

I feel your pain OP, although we have issues with length as much as width.

DD was in same age clothing until she was about 7. She will be 11 next week - she's naturally bigger framed like 6'4 DH and his Amazonian cousins and just over 5ft tall in size 7 shoes. She is generally quite toned but at the moment has thicker than average waist, which we've largely chalked up to puberty. Have seen GP who said to just keep a healthy diet and encourage exercise and let her grow into it.

In the meantime I have conceded defeat and get most of her clothes in small adult sizes now (although some H&M & New Look teen stuff still fits depending on the style), which is fine but I am having absolute hell on wheels trying to get her school skirts. Ordered age 16 ones from Next last week and the length is ridiculous - mid thigh on an 11yo so God only knows what a 16yo would look like in it .

She also doesn't like anything too fitted or structured around the waist so basically lives in leggings, shorts and dresses.