Was I wrong?

(101 Posts)
Ballpitintheway Wed 12-Aug-15 22:00:13

Nc for this one sorry

Dh is at work, eldest dc at a campout tonight, and dts (18 months) tucked up in bed, fast asleep. Both dts sleep through, rarely wake, and are in separate cots, so safe and contained.

Realised about half an hour ago I'd run out of milk, so had to nip to the shop to grab some. Now, the shop is literally at the end of my drive. Out the back door, along the path (12 feet ish), through the gate, down the drive, and I'm at the shop. I can see part of the house from the shop door (but not the till). The shop is so close that the baby monitor still works with picture and sound at the back of the shop, and is definitely closer than my garden.

Babies asleep, so I grabbed money and baby monitor, ran to the shop, grabbed the milk, paid, and came back home. Was away less than 2 minutes, and could see and hear dts at all times via the monitor. Heard the phone ring too.

Came home, did 1471, called friend back. She asked where I'd been, I said I'd gone to the shop. She proceeded to give me a proper lecture over how dangerous, irresponsible, etc etc I'd been, and how lucky I was that nothing happened.

Wtf? Was I really being irresponsible? I need milk for dts for breakfast, and honestly can't see that I put dts in any danger at all - the only way into the house was past the shop, all other doors are locked, they're probably more likely to come to harm when I'm in the shower!

Friend has told me that she's too angry to explain anything, but I'm honestly confused. If I did wrong, I'll certainly not do it again, but did I?

YeOldeTrout Wed 12-Aug-15 22:02:47

Oh I'd do it. But put on your flameproof coat!!

HappySeven Wed 12-Aug-15 22:03:14

There'll be people along soon to tell us we're both wrong but I'd have done the same as you.

<fluffs up cushion>

Popcorn anyone?

ChampagneTastes Wed 12-Aug-15 22:05:17

I would do it in an emergency but I don't think I'd do it otherwise. I think that your decision was understandable but I wouldn't have done it because of that tiny chance that something could happen. That's probably because I'd be terrified of the judgement more than being worried about the children though!

coolaschmoola Wed 12-Aug-15 22:05:17

I wouldn't have done it, but I wouldn't have commented on you doing it either.

formerbabe Wed 12-Aug-15 22:05:44

I wouldn't have done it...would have just gone in the morning with them to get milk. I'm not outraged by it though!

myideaoffun Wed 12-Aug-15 22:05:44

Personally I can't see what's wrong. You were 2 min away and still monitoring. What's the problem? For instance, simply taking a shower would surely be riskier in terms of your not hearing anything.

Sirzy Wed 12-Aug-15 22:07:19

Personally I wouldn't. I would have just took them with me for the milk in the morning.

UrethraFranklin1 Wed 12-Aug-15 22:07:32

I'd do it. I've done similar. But you're going to get people telling you that you might have had a heart attack and died instantly in the shop and no-one would have known about the poor bairns pining at home. OR that the house could have gone on fire and been so consumed that the 30 seconds it took you to get back meant instant death. Or you could be abducted by aliens....

RJnomore Wed 12-Aug-15 22:07:48

You know, if I could still use the monitor, I think I would have too.

BestZebbie Wed 12-Aug-15 22:08:48

Your circumstance seems to be a particularly special case because of still being so close that the baby monitor works. The main risk I could think of in that situation (assuming that you are usually a sensible adult who doesn't randomly leave the gas on etc) would be you locking yourself out by closing your door without a key while it was on a yale lock?

DurhamDurham Wed 12-Aug-15 22:10:35

I'd have done the same thing under those circumstances, the only difference being that I wouldn't have told my friend. You risk assessed the situation and like you say were only gone for two minutes.......some people just like to create a little drama in their heads about the apocalypse that might have happened in your absence.

travertine Wed 12-Aug-15 22:10:51

I would have done it. Funny thing is parents are quite happy when their children are out playing to let them be but in the house asleep is a different thing. To br fair I could leave them alone longer having a poo. (lighthearted)

Peaceloveandcustardcreams Wed 12-Aug-15 22:11:21

I agree YANBU and that they were probably in less danger than when you're in the shower and unable to monitor/hear them. My local shop is just that little bit too far away to tempt me to do this, but it has crossed my mind, and I wouldn't judge someone in your particular circumstances.

Minisoksmakehardwork Wed 12-Aug-15 22:12:23

I'm a mum of twins plus two a little older, and I've done things which make some people gape in amazement/horror/fear. And I know you said the monitor works in the shop. But even I wouldn't have gone to the shop. I'd've asked dh to get milk on his way home, asked my neighbour in the morning, even forgone the milk until I could get some. But tbh the only mistake you made was telling your friend. You could have been settling the baby or on the loo when the phone rang.

ouryve Wed 12-Aug-15 22:12:41

How desperately did you need milk at 9:30pm?

raffle Wed 12-Aug-15 22:13:43

Ahhh it's fine. If you have a big house and garden you can be 2 minutes away from sleeping children without leaving your actual property.

ScarlettDarling Wed 12-Aug-15 22:16:35

Is it right to leave your toddlers asleep in bed while you leave the house? Of course not!

But...you were out for 2 minutes, you had a baby monitor with you,seriously, what risk does your friend think there was?

Yes, I guess you could have had a heart attack and your toddlers would be left home alone. But surely you could have a heart attack just as easily in the house, leaving them alone in bed?

Take no notice of your friend. It's not up to her to tell you how to look after your children . You assessed the risk in this situation, found it to be negligible and acted responsibly.

TooOldForGlitter Wed 12-Aug-15 22:20:08

I'd do it. You could see the house so potential fires/meteor strikes/localised sink holes were as visible as if you'd been in the back garden having a breather/fag anyway. No biggie. Do be prepared though grin

DameMargaretOfChalfont Wed 12-Aug-15 22:20:31

What you did was absolutely fine.

If you'd gone to the local pub for a pint and a ploughman's I might be a bit more judgemental but you've nothing to worry about.

And if friend gets persistent with her condemnation just remember the old adage - ODFOD.

wafflyversatile Wed 12-Aug-15 22:23:01

Hard to see that you were at more risk doing this than say, falling down the stairs coming down from their room, or tripping over the rake putting something in the bin at the bottom of the garden, slipping in the shower etc, etc, etc. You could lock yourself out taking something to the bin 3 ft from your door.

Sounds like she's being massively over-dramatic.

SweetAndFullOfGrace Wed 12-Aug-15 22:23:42

Seems fine to me. You assessed the risk sensibly, you had a way of keeping an eye on them, you weren't far away...

StillStayingClassySanDiego Wed 12-Aug-15 22:24:20

It's fine.

You stayed in contact, all was well and you're home.

Job done.

ollieplimsoles Wed 12-Aug-15 22:25:03

I wouldn't do it, BUT I would have wished I'd had the guts to just rush out for 5 mins to get milk.

I would have just sat in the house wishing we had milk in...

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