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AIBU?

No thank you for baby gift

104 replies

Jellylorum · 04/08/2015 17:11

I knitted a small blanket for an old school friend's second baby, nothing fancy but took a fair amount of time. The friend has moved across the country so I rarely see her but do stay in touch by text and phone. All she's done to thank me is send a brief text; this was six months ago. AIBU to expect more or should I just accept she's been busy and forget about being upset?

OP posts:
Jedi1 · 04/08/2015 17:12

Did the text say thank you? Have you texted her since?

She's probably a bit busy with the new baby to be doing thank you cards...

NerrSnerr · 04/08/2015 17:15

So she did thank you when she set the text? I imagine she's quite busy if she has two children. Me and my uni friends don't see each other often but send gifts for all our children, most of the time we send thank you cards, but sometimes it falls by the wayside if busy.

Birdsgottafly · 04/08/2015 17:16

Have you asked her how she is and enquired about the baby?

My DD had things sent to her, she puts pictures up on FB and/or emails people pictures.

It seems odd that you aren't in touch with her tbh.

FourEyesGood · 04/08/2015 17:16

Why did you give her the gift?

Griphook · 04/08/2015 17:17

Uanbu, she text you to say thankyou what more do you want?

Griphook · 04/08/2015 17:18

yabvu aww auto correct

Providore · 04/08/2015 17:18

Give her a break! When my baby was born I was catapulted into an unimaginable hell run by a screaming non-sleeping velcro baby who was permanently latched on. He didn't sleep longer than twenty minutes, day or night, and even then that was on the boob. Stopped his 24 hour screaming sometime around 14 months, once we got on the right combo of reflux drugs, but he never slept longer than an hour or two til he was over three. Up til that point, I can assure you that writing a thank you note could not have been further down my list of priorities. I may have managed to text people who sent things, but that time is such a blur of horrible exhausted, screaming, breaking-point memories that I can't be sure of that.

Jellylorum · 04/08/2015 17:19

Yes we've been in touch a bit and it's been fine. She did thank me originally and I sent it because I like her, just I've always had high standards about thank you cards! Maybe I need to move on!

OP posts:
trilbydoll · 04/08/2015 17:20

DD2 is 10wo and I haven't finished the thank you cards, I've got 4 left to do. They've all been thanked in person or by text but I like doing cards too. As a giver I am happy with a text though Smile

MrsTedCrilly · 04/08/2015 17:24

She thanked you by text! A thankyou by any form holds the same sentiment, appreciation for something.. This is the modern world, a text is the same as a thankyou card.

ollieplimsoles · 04/08/2015 17:25

This thank you card thing really annoys me. My mum was hounded by family members after my wedding about when they can 'expect a card' and my mil was on our back as soon as we got back from our honeymoon. Telling us to hurry up with the thank you cards as people at work were starting to ask her and it was making her look bad... It had been a week.

ollieplimsoles · 04/08/2015 17:26

Posted so soon...

If you give some one a gift, especially for a new baby, except that writing a card for you may not be exactly high up on their lost of things to do...

timeforacheckup · 04/08/2015 17:28

Blimey you sound hard work! She's said thank you - that's more than I managed for the first couple of months after dd2 was born. Get over yourself.

Jellylorum · 04/08/2015 17:30

Oh ok! If I'm the only one who expects more than a text maybe I won't make so much effort with cards in the future Wink

OP posts:
WorldsBiggestGrotbag · 04/08/2015 17:30

We got that from the IL's after our wedding too ollie, before we were even back from honeymoon!!

AngieBolen · 04/08/2015 17:32

Wow, I can't believe you are still thinking about this 6 months later!

I imagine with 2 DC she has indeed been very busy!

caravanista13 · 04/08/2015 17:32

I'm of the card sending generation, but I'd be just as happy with are text.

dexter73 · 04/08/2015 17:33

If you like writing cards then you don't have to stop. You just need to realise that many people now send texts or emails instead of cards. It isn't less of a thank you than a card.

Gileswithachainsaw · 04/08/2015 17:34

blimey the sensible. People are on this thread thank god.

usually nothing short of sky writing, shout outs on radio stations or thank you a written in unicorn blood is acceptable.

A thank you is a thank you and honestly if people are giving fir no other reason than to get the cards and endless grattitude for eternity then really they shouldn't bother.

A text is fine Wink

Flashbangandgone · 04/08/2015 17:37

Frankly thank you cards do take a bit of time and effort to organise - finding and buying cards, writing cards, addressing envelopes, getting stamps, taking to postbox etc. - not a massive amount, but when you add it all up it's more than a few minutes. You basically seem to be saying that you knitted her a blanket, now you want her to do some "work" in return for you, even though she has a newborn and another child! YABVU

GraysAnalogy · 04/08/2015 17:37

So she said thank you, this was SIX MONTHS AGO, and you're still pissed about it?


I'm really going to have to start asking for stipulations of gratitude before accepting gifts.

And I have never sent nor received a thank you card for a gift in my life. I don't know anyone who has except at weddings.

MrsHathaway · 04/08/2015 17:38

A hand knitted blanket is a big deal - my most recent took nearly two months - but generally speaking a text is enough. At least you know it arrived safely.

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OhtoblazeswithElvira · 04/08/2015 17:39

I understand OP. I made a quilt for a relative's new baby. All they did was point to the quilt in the background when they skyped, saying that they had received it in the post. Not even a thank you. They have had another baby; no quilts this time but an outfit from the Asda sale (got no thanks either!). I think that some people don't appreciate that it takes a lot of time, love and money to make things.

MissDemelzaCarne · 04/08/2015 17:39

Wow, YABU and a tad ridiculous.

BitterChocolate · 04/08/2015 17:40

If she's young enough to have a baby then she's not of the card-sending generation IMO. A 'thank you' text is a thank you, I would also hope for a cute photo of the baby snuggled in the blanket, but it's not a requirement.

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