I don't know how to get out of it though, without rocking the boat.
We have been separated for a year, following his infidelity and absolutely shitty treatment of me. Since he went, he continues to look after our dc before and after school (was a sahd before) and has walked away from the marriage with nothing financially, while I stay with the dc in the family home. This was all his choice, as I wanted to work on the marriage and he didn't, though he is not living with her now. He pays £80 per month for the dc, direct to the childminder we use in the morning.
He also has MS and last week had his first relapse since we split. He is on the mend now, but has lost work and money (temp contracts). While he was ill, I picked him up and brought him back here several times to see the dc. It's not that far, but, tbh, I resented the petrol money and the fact that he had meals while here. I know this is petty, and I said nothing, but it's how I felt.
We haven't seen him since Monday as I told him I'd like a few days with the dc to relax (I'm a teacher, so just broke up) but told him to contact us later in the week - like today. On Weds some tickets (could tell) came for him and he texted me asking if post had come. I was out at the time but told him I thought tickets had come and he said he'd come and pick them up. So he was recvered enough to drive then and had bought some tickets for something while having spent the grand total of £1.99 on d2's b/d present last week .
Today I asked him when he was planning to come and se the dc (he has nowhere to take them so always comes here) and, after prompting said he would come 'lunchtime' with his dad. His dad lives a 90 minute drive away, so don't know (or care) why he's around - h has nowhere to put him up, but I don't want him here for lunch, or at all. He is a nice man, but I don't want to be hostess and polite and basically feel uncomfortable I my own home while I am supposed to be on holiday. One of h's many 'issues' with me was that I wasn't 'open' enough with his family, and I know it will result in hostility if I tell him it doesn't suit me. H is also cat-sitting my cats next week while dc and I are away.
FFS. AIBU to think he should not put me in this position. It almost feels like a test.
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AIBU?
To not want to give ex and ex-fil lunch tomorrow?
44 replies
thinkingmakesitso · 23/07/2015 21:12
OP posts:
AlpacaMyBags ·
24/07/2015 10:42
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Message withdrawn at poster's request.
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