Needing some words of wisdom

(4 Posts)
glittertree Thu 16-Jul-15 09:07:12

Can anyone please help me make a big decision here ? I will try and keep this as short and uncomplicated as possible .
I have a son who had a very destructive relationship with his partner she was very abusive to him he ran away all the time because he was so unhappy they had children together .An example of things that would happen would be her locking him in the house ,taking his bank card off him so he had no money , no money for his phone ,phoning him and demanding him to come home from work ,phoning all of us and screaming things down the phone that's really the very tip of the iceberg
As his mother I tried to advise him to leave as this was destructive but she used to threaten him with not seeing the children.
To cut a long story short he finally left , I went to visit her to reassure her no matter what I would be there to help with the grandchildren she then threatened that she would have him locked up if she didn't get all his money
The next thing to happen was that my son was taken to the police station where she has made allegations of him hurting her and being rough with the children which I just know that he never ,he adored them it's her act of revenge
The next door neighbour said he used to hear her screaming at my son from day to night and didn't know how he coped but is unwilling to go to court because he lives next door and is scared of her
May I add she has a three page police record spanning back years so I know she has issues and that became very clear very quickly
I've never once said anything nasty or tried to interfere all along I've just felt worry for my son he is 21 so still so young , and the grandchildren were constantly used as weapons and whenever they fell out I wouldn't be able to see them
Bear with me I'm nearly finished sorry if this is so long
My problem is her daughter goes to the same school as my youngest everyday I have to pass her and her family and my beautiful grandchildren who I am not allowed to speak to or she just kicks off
Her family glare and practically snarl at me as I walk by every single day I go to pick my son up they stand in the same place so that I have to walk round them it kills me ...I feel so sick in my stomach knowing I have to face them day in day out for years that this battle will just continue
Every corner I walk round I practically bump into them it's a horrendous situation ...
my son can't have any contact until his case is heard ,a few weeks ago it came up and they told her she didn't have any evidence and to try and drop it to which she suddenly started to argue in court she had more .
She has had six months to give it in but all of a sudden she had a text ?
So it's been reset again
Anyway I apologise for this long winded story but Aibu to want to sell my house and move away from here I love my home but this is a small place and I feel this will never end I'm living on my nerves all the time ,the thought of years of hatefulness makes me despair and of walking past my grandchildren and not being able to speak to them I just can't handle it anymore
she's also told the whole town my son is a beater and child abuser I just can't take much more ! Anyone with any advice at all ?

SylvanianCaliphate Thu 16-Jul-15 09:10:48

Ah flowers

No advice but that sounds fucking horrendous!

TheHouseOnBellSt Thu 16-Jul-15 09:38:54

I think your son should go for full custody of his children as she sounds unbalanced in the extreme. Go to legal on MN and get advice.

paulapompom Thu 16-Jul-15 11:15:28

Sounds awful. YaNbu to want to move, but I agree with TheHouse^
Get some legal advice, for yourself and your son about what's best for the children. You have done nothing wrong but her family have either believed her stories or just don't care about the rights and wrongs and are blindly backing her - either way they should not be intimidating you. I hope it all gets sorted soon flowers

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