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AIBU?

To report this sports coach?

14 replies

IamJeff · 24/05/2015 19:41

I went to watch my partner play cricket at his home team ground yesterday and afterwards some of the coaches, parents and children from the junior section were having a gathering and drinking lots of alcohol.
Towards the end of the night me and another girl were walking around drinking and chatting and I noticed one if the coaches who was clearly drunk shouting at a woman and she was shouting too. He was being very aggressive towards her and she was definitely putting up a fight verbally.

This woman had young kids around her and the girl looked visibly upset, a girl of about 14 was also upset. I saw the woman leave crying hysterically.

The altercation has been playing on my mind all day ?I know the man is a parent who coaches the young children. On the other hand drink fuelled arguments are common and often forgotten the next day.

I'm tempted to make the club aware of this coaches behaviour but partner says don't make a fuss!

Aibu to send an email to the chairman or should I keep out of this???

His behaviour was undesirable and in the club premises but it was probably something and nothing!

OP posts:

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crustsaway · 24/05/2015 19:58

Send an email to the chairman? are you for real?

Keep out of it.

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PeachyPants · 24/05/2015 20:00

I think no good will come of you getting involved with this.

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eyebags63 · 24/05/2015 20:02

I think YWBU. It sounds like they were both drunk and having an argument. I can't see anything good coming out of this at all.

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ThroughThickAndThin01 · 24/05/2015 20:02

I think you should keep out of it.

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FarFromAnyRoad · 24/05/2015 20:03

Two words.

Beak out.

That is all.

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IamJeff · 24/05/2015 20:09

Beak out yes you're probably right none of my business and I think the people in the group if they were concerned that the young children were badly affected by his aggression towards the mum they would take him aside and warn him.

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DoJo · 24/05/2015 21:12

If he was being aggressive to someone completely out of the blue, I can understand that you might be concerned, but as you go to great pains in your OP to point out that the woman was giving as good as she got, then I don't see why he is the one who should be held accountable.

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IamJeff · 27/05/2015 14:51

Because he is the sports coach getting aggressive in front of the kids he coaches and she was not?

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samG76 · 27/05/2015 14:57

YANBU - if the children he coaches were around, this isn't acceptable and I would raise it. Would be different (though still no especially praiseworthy) if he went out on the lash after the match and had a row in a bar. Maybe better to have a word with him first, though. If he apologises, you could let it go. If he doesn't see the problem, then worth following up.

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AuntyMag10 · 27/05/2015 15:01

Yes butt out. You have no idea what their argument was about. The children's mother was standing there giving it in front of her own kids.

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YsabellStoHelit · 27/05/2015 15:03

"coaches, parents and children from the junior section were having a gathering and drinking lots of alcohol."

Drunk people have fights. It's common knowledge. If you don't want your kids to see drunken fights DON'T sit with said kids in a big group of people getting drunk.

I can't see how she is any less responsible than he is?

End of.

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IamJeff · 27/05/2015 15:27

Of course she is responsible! I didn't say that. Think I need to take my teacher head off because my main concern would be a safeguarding one, that the man in question had behaved unacceptably in front of children he coaches . I didn't have children there. But you're completely right they were all irresponsible if you think of it like that. They can be irresponsible. Personally he shouldn't have been. He was on the premises of the club where he coaches the children acting aggressively in front of them. It is hard to put into words the Uneasy instinct I had.

I am not going to report it as it is completely none of my business but I know that if I acted in this way at school in front of my pupils I would be at risk of losing my job.

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SoupDragon · 27/05/2015 15:31

my main concern would be a safeguarding one, that the man in question had behaved unacceptably in front of children he coaches

The woman behaved unacceptably in front of children she is in charge of.

I get where you are coming from but why report the coach when the altercation may have been the fault of the woman or 50/50...

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IamJeff · 29/05/2015 17:54

Soup dragon, this is true, I'm grateful for some perspective on this and glad I did not react myself!