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AIBU?

To rally Irish voters here and ask is anyone voting No tomorrow?

415 replies

LayMeDown · 21/05/2015 14:13

I know there's lots of Irish on MN. I don't know anyone in RL voting No. But polls indicates it's tightening a lot. I'm getting scared it won't pass and my lovely brother and his partner will be left out in the cold again. What are you all hearing in your circles?

FYI for any non Irish there is a referendum tomorrow on introducing same sex marriage in Ireland.

OP posts:
chaletdays · 21/05/2015 14:17

I know some people who are voting no, including a couple of people who are gay.
The No campaigners think the polls might be misleading as a lot of No voters feel too intimidated to answer them honestly.

Radiatorvalves · 21/05/2015 14:23

I hope it will be a yes. All my Irish relations under about 50 are probably voting yes. But there are a lot of older traditional types who will be less vocal and will vote no.

RobbStarksBitch · 21/05/2015 14:24

I'm an Irish/English mumsnetter currently living in UK.

Everyone I know in Ireland (including my dad which has actually surprised me) is voting yes Smile

birkiekid · 21/05/2015 14:30

Dh is convinced that the No vote will be higher than expected because he thinks a lot of people would say yes when being polled but will actually vote no in private.

We are voting yes. Have a gay family member in a long term relationship so it means a lot to us.

nocabbageinmyeye · 21/05/2015 14:32

I'm Irish, I'll be voting Yes and really hope it does through but I think it will be very very close and I'm not overly confident, I think as chaletdays says a lot of the no voters are being quiet about it. I don't think it will be a great turnout either, there will probably be a younger turnout that there would be for a general election but I don't think anyone is overly fussed about the presidential referendum either so people who will be directly unaffected may not come out to vote.

I think if it's does go through though that makes us the first country in the world to vote for gay marriage through popular vote, which would be great, fingers crossed!

ApocalypseThen · 21/05/2015 14:33

I'm Irish and for the first time in my life, I'm not voting. I'm on high alert for labour and can't travel down the country where I still have my vote. I think it's the first time there's ever been a referendum that I've been so sincerely passionate about since I became eligible to vote, so it's a strange one.

LayMeDown · 21/05/2015 14:33

Yes I am worried the No vote is higher than the polls indicate. I think a lot of Don't knows will fall into the No camp in the day. The No side have IMO run a very successful campaign in muddying the waters and changing the subject totally. I am very concerned it won't pass.

OP posts:
itchysofunny · 21/05/2015 14:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TTWK · 21/05/2015 14:35

In any referendum, on any issue, and in any country, just vote the opposite way to the religious establishment. That way, even if you can't be bothered to research the issue, you will be voting the right way!

Aermingers · 21/05/2015 14:36

I think my FIL is voting no, he is quite old. If it doesn't go through I think they may have made a mistake in not doing what the British did and moving for civil partnerships in the first instance and moving on to marriage later. Hope it goes through though.

Greenstone · 21/05/2015 14:37

I don't know anybody in my circle who is either voting no or who I'd suspect of being a silent no voter. I really don't think I do.

They are certainly out there though, in the undecideds.

LayMeDown · 21/05/2015 14:40

Aermingers There has been civil partnership here for several years. Marriage requires a constitutional change which is why there is a need for a referendum. According to no side there is no need for marriage since civil partnership is 'nearly' the same. This is the same people who insisted civil partnership would bring the end of civilisation as we know it. It's the best thing ever now though!

OP posts:
leedy · 21/05/2015 14:40

I'm voting Yes and so is pretty much everyone I know, including a lot of older people. That said, as others have said upthread, I think it's far from a done deal and a lot of people will quietly vote No in the privacy of the polling station, and that the scare tactics and misinformation of the No campaign have hit home with a lot of voters. My own generally fairly liberal mum was tending towards a "No" vote with some vague hand-wavey "it's all changing so fast"/"aren't civil partnerships enough?" reasons, I'm hoping she's changed her mind since.

gabsdot45 · 21/05/2015 15:01

I'm going to vote no. I had made my decision a long time ago and I actually disagree with a lot of the 'no' campaign's points. The latest thing is bringing surrogacy into it, We don't even have any proper laws regarding surrogacy for currently married couples, let alone the extremely small number of same sex couples who may get married and who may decide to have a baby with surrogacy in the future. I think the 'no' campaign have confused a lot of the issues.
Anyway. I think that same sex relationships should be protected in law, but for me, marriage is a union between and man and woman in the sight of God. I am a very tolerant person, but I know many people will think I'm not because of my views. I can't help that. I actually haven't told anyone how I'm going to vote because I'm afraid of the inevitable abuse I'll get.
In saying all that I'm sure that the yes side will win tomorrow but it'll be interesting to see how big the no vote is. I think commentators and politicians assumed that everyone was a supporter of SSM. A lot less people are then they assumed.

tazzy73 · 21/05/2015 15:05

I know of two people who are voting no. One has surprised me with this view while the other it would be typical, very old fashioned about religion, article 8 etc.... think I might be stepping back from them to be honest. Im a vote yes screaming from the roof tops type of girl.

To rally Irish voters here and ask is anyone voting No tomorrow?
leedy · 21/05/2015 15:08

"marriage is a union between and man and woman in the sight of God"

Obviously you've made up your mind, but isn't what you're talking about the religious sacrament of marriage, which won't be affected at all by the constitutional change? Churches can still specify that church marriages have to be between a man and a woman, and that's their prerogative. A civil marriage isn't in the sight of anyone except the state (in fact you can't have any religious accoutrements/music at a civil ceremony). Churches in Ireland facilitate civil marriage by having the civil ceremony (signing of register in front of witnesses) during the church ceremony, but it's a separate thing and in many countries (eg France) the two marriage ceremonies happen in different buildings.

leedy · 21/05/2015 15:10

"(in fact you can't have any religious accoutrements/music at a civil ceremony)"

Sorry, meant to say at a purely civil ceremony, ie registry office wedding. Obviously the civil marriage bit of a church wedding is a different beast.

LayMeDown · 21/05/2015 15:12

gabsdot45 with the greatest of respect (and I mean that) you are wrong. A civil marriage is not a union of a man and a woman before God. Civil marriage makes no mention of God. It is state recognition for the Union. Religious marriage will be unaffected by this referendum. In religious ceremonies marriage will continue to be the Union of a man and a woman before God. Unless the religion itself opts to extend (which I think we can safely assume won't happen in either of our lifetimes certainly where the RC church is concerned).

OP posts:
chaletdays · 21/05/2015 15:13

I have to say tazzy73 you sound quite intolerant of others' views yourself.

Lottapianos · 21/05/2015 15:17

I really hope its a Yes majority. I grew up in Ireland ( havent' lived there for 15 years now) and I was very pleasantly surprised to hear how many people are planning to vote yes. Like with civil marriage for SS couples in the UK in the past couple of years, its a shame we're even having a debate about this, but the tide is turning, no doubt about it.

If its a Yes majority, are there any plans to extend civil partnerships in Ireland to opposite sex couples, like the Tories are flat out refusing to do here?

leedy · 21/05/2015 15:20

"I have to say tazzy73 you sound quite intolerant of others' views yourself."

What's so intolerant about being an enthusiastic "yes" voter?

Also it's a bit difficult to be "live and let live" about others' views if they're portraying you or your friends/relatives as second-class citizens, or even if they're just (as gabsdot45 seems to be) kind of ill-informed. "Ah, you think this'll change religious marriage! You're wrong but I can't politely tell you because that's intolerant!" "Ah, you think all gay people are Hell-bound perverts but I can't tell you that's unacceptable because that would be intolerant!"

Obviously I don't think all No voters should be jeered at in the street or anything, and I believe there are people who are genuinely just misinformed or haven't thought it through, but I'm getting a bit tired of No campaigners claiming that they're being "bullied" and "shamed" by the big nasty Yes people for being ignorant and homophobic.

RuggerHug · 21/05/2015 15:23

Another yes voter here. I hope to hell though that if the no vote wins it'll be another Lisbon treaty where we've to do it again until we give the right answer.

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chaletdays · 21/05/2015 15:23

I meant her comment that she was going to be 'stepping back' from those friends who are voting no, which I took to mean cooling down the friendship. Apologies if I misinterpreted that bit?

madreloco · 21/05/2015 15:25

You can't vote no and call yourself a tolerant person. You're afraid to tell anyone you're voting no because you are rightly ashamed of yourself, gabsdot. If you were confident you were right you wouldn't be hiding it.

MitzyLeFrouf · 21/05/2015 15:26

I have faith that Yes will be the victor.

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