I am no saint, but is it possible to salvage this friendship?
My (male) friend and I have been close for many years, since we were at school, and went to university together.
He got together with his dp under a cloud- she was in the closing days of a relationship with his flatmate (they would go through long periods of 'trial seperation), and I was often asked to cover for the both of them, which to my shame, I did.
I've never been particularly crazy about her- we work together and can coordinate well, but occaisionally wind each other up in private conversation (we have differing opinions on a number of subjects, and I've always been a sucker for an argument)
The other night, she and I, plus some other people went out drinking (my friend was away), and ended up back at hers, rather drunk. The conversation ended up sex-related, we played 'never have I ever' and friends dp began to list all of the risque things she'd done, with both men and women. She began claiming that she was fantastic in bed and that women could pleasure women more than men, and I (semi-jokingly) interjected that she probably wasn't all that. She looked me in the eye and said 'If I slept with you I'd rock your world' (She does have a tendency to get flirty when she drinks).I replied 'Oh yeah?' and she put her hand on my leg and replied in the affirmative. I felt uncomfortable, and stood up, and said that we should pretend that conversation had never taken place. I left soon after.
Fast forward to today. I'd chalked up the other night to having too many sherberts, and assumed she wouldn't remember- she often claims to have no memory of drinking nights. Lunchtime and I'm with with her, best friend, and some of the people we went out with. I make a reference to the 'Never have I ever' game, on account of the fact that one of the people we played it with is a semi-famous, and best friend's dp goes bright red. This afternoon she sidles up to me and begins complaining that I've gone back on promising her that I wouldn't say anything, and how dare I make fun of her. I respond by pointing out I hadn't referenced her directly, but that if she could remember that conversation then she clearly can't be as drunk as she seems to be and that she should have some self-control about flirting with people, particularly as she knows it winds dp up (probably out of order there). She walks off.
Best friend calls me up this evening and yells down the phone that I've really upset her by making fun of her and 'jusging her', and that I apparently know it really upsets her when people are judgmental. He tells me I'm not welcome at theirs anymore.
I'm not really sure what went wrong there? Was I out of order, or have they overreacted?
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Have fallen out with best friend and his dp- was it my fault?
85 replies
joeyhm · 06/03/2015 20:26
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