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AIBU?

To think I shouldn't have to endure breast AND bottle ��

44 replies

RunAwayKey · 01/03/2015 01:53

I breastfed and co slept with my toddler until 22 months, reluctantly, and hourly feeds often. I put up with it thinking at least I don't have to drag myself out of bed at all hours to reheat bottles ?.

So this ended with a lot of encouragement, and bliss for a few weeks... Then the bedtime bottle began. Fine I thought.
Next came the 4-5am hot milky request. Ok I thought, it's better than getting up then.
Next came the 10-11pm one. This is when she comes from her bed into mine, so again it's bearable.
But 1.30 am? No! No no no.

Why am I doing 4 bottles a night for a 2.5 year old?! My boobs suffered to avoid this ??

AIBU to have a full blown tantrum when she next wakes me up?!

OP posts:
PintofCiderPlease · 01/03/2015 01:58

I get you! I watered the middle of the night ones down gradually until they were mostly water. DS was so insulted he gave up asking! Wink

CultureSucksDownWords · 01/03/2015 01:58

Don't have a tantrum, but don't give her a bottle either. You're right that she doesn't need them at this age at all.

anothernumberone · 01/03/2015 02:15

We did give a couple of cups of milk in the night but straight from the fridge and it was a very short lived phase. I didn't really resent it though because it was DH's turn after all I supplied the first 2.5 years of milk day and night. Unsurprisingly DH knocked the idea of middle of the night milk out of the park pretty quickly too.

my2centsis · 01/03/2015 02:17

Why are you giving a bottle to a 2.5yr old?

fleecyjumper · 01/03/2015 03:16

Just give water, she'll soon realise it's not worth waking up for.

fluffymouse · 01/03/2015 03:20

Stop giving bottles, and she will soon stop asking.

Just leave a sippy cup of water by the bed.

2.5 is far too old to be still having bottles, let alone 4 per night. That is really bad for her teeth.

Topseyt · 01/03/2015 03:41

Seriously, just don't give them. A 2.5 year old does not need night feeds at all.

I used to give mine a bottle of cow's milk to drink before they went to bed (which they were often feeding themselves with at that age).

Beyond that, they just had a lidded beaker with a bit of water in it beside their beds.

I don't think it would be unreasonable to get angry with her (within reason of course). She has to learn that she cannot just demand something in the middle of the night if she feels like it.

Don't oblige her by getting the drinks. Just make sure you have left water within reach and be strict with her. Don't feel guilty. She may keep ramping the demands up otherwise, as she seems to be doing now.

DixieNormas · 01/03/2015 04:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

blueteapot · 01/03/2015 04:41

At 2.5 she shouldnt be getting bottles at all, or night feeds - my DS is just turned 2, he was bottle fed from pretty early on - he had a bedtime (8pm) bottle of cows milk until 1.5 which was longer than recommended, and all other drinks in a cup from age 1. He currently gets milk in a cup now before bed. Definitely no overnight milk and no bottles (teeth!) at this stage. As suggested upthread I would replace with water, its likely a comfort thing by the sounds of it so she'll soon lose interest

blueteapot · 01/03/2015 04:41

At 2.5 she shouldnt be getting bottles at all, or night feeds - my DS is just turned 2, he was bottle fed from pretty early on - he had a bedtime (8pm) bottle of cows milk until 1.5 which was longer than recommended, and all other drinks in a cup from age 1. He currently gets milk in a cup now before bed. Definitely no overnight milk and no bottles (teeth!) at this stage. As suggested upthread I would replace with water, its likely a comfort thing by the sounds of it so she'll soon lose interest

blueteapot · 01/03/2015 04:41

At 2.5 she shouldnt be getting bottles at all, or night feeds - my DS is just turned 2, he was bottle fed from pretty early on - he had a bedtime (8pm) bottle of cows milk until 1.5 which was longer than recommended, and all other drinks in a cup from age 1. He currently gets milk in a cup now before bed. Definitely no overnight milk and no bottles (teeth!) at this stage. As suggested upthread I would replace with water, its likely a comfort thing by the sounds of it so she'll soon lose interest

SuperMumTum · 01/03/2015 05:05

My DD (3.5) has always wanted milk in the night. I stopped bf at 7 months because she was feeding all night long and i got no sleep. We then battled for another year or so over night time bottles, trying everything else to get her to sleep but nothing else worked. She just loved warm milk in the night and would easily guzzle 4 big bottles but it affected her appetite in the day so we persevered. It was very hard though. She still now wakes occasionally and demands milk but 9/10 times I refuse. Some nights she gets all hysterical asking for milk and eventually gets cold milk in a cup from the fridge against my better judgement. I don't know the answer but breaking the habit has been so hard and the advice to "just give her water" was spectacularly unhelpful.

rootypig · 01/03/2015 05:42

Why am I doing 4 bottles a night for a 2.5 year old?

Because every time she wakes up and asks for one, you give it to her.

Imagine you woke up every night and when you did, you asked for a bag of maltesers you got them and scoffed the lot and it was bliss. What would you do the next night?

Now imagine you woke up and asked for a bag of maltesers and didn't get any, and had to go back to sleep without them.

She has a sleep association. Bottle, breast, it doesn't matter. They don't need night feeds from probably 7/8 months, definitely not from a year, and absolutely not at 2.5.

Everyone partially rouses in the night, this is normal. It's what you think happens then that's the problem. You have to cut her off. Grit your teeth, it'll be painful in the short term. But honestly, isn't she bloody knackered? all that drinking means lots of urinating too. And her digestive tract is going round the clock, which will affect her sleep.

QOD · 01/03/2015 06:01

My Dd used to shout at me and throw the bottle/beaker across the room if it wasn't proper . milkBlush

rootypig · 01/03/2015 06:44

Grin

This is why you have to night wean before they can throw. Or talk. Or get out of bed and ask you for things Grin

Justtrying · 01/03/2015 07:02

We had this with dd until just before Christmas, we told her she had to wrap her bottles up and send them to Santa for little babies. We then got Santa to write her a letter saying well done. Never had a problem since. Others have done similar using the bottle fairy. Perhaps worth a try.

LokiBear · 01/03/2015 07:40

You need to get her into a routine. Put a sippy cup full of water next to her bed. When she wakes, just say 'it isn't milk time now, have a sip of water, then it is sleep time'. You might be met with resistance, but if you persevere she will get used to it. My dd is 3.5 and has a sippy cup of water next to her bed. I get thirsty during the night so I think it is reasonable to expect that little ones do too. However, I only ever give water.

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 01/03/2015 07:43

Hmm that's pretty unanimous then! Grin

anothernumberone · 01/03/2015 08:44

They don't need night feeds from probably 7/8 months I don't agree with this but then I had 2 bottle fed babies who slept though from very early on so I can see where it comes from. Many babies do need night feeding for much longer. For example when I went back to work after 6 months ML, DS main source of milk was coming from me at night time because pumping during work was not possible. It is called reverse cycling.

FayKorgasm · 01/03/2015 08:50

When she wakes just say no milk until morning and bring her back to bed.

monkeymamma · 01/03/2015 10:07

There's a quote on the Dr Sears website (which i luffs) that is something along the lines of... If every time I woke in the night I got a glass of fresh orange juice and a back rub, I'd be waking up all the time too! Say no, give water if you have reason to think she's genuinely thirsty, she will soon give it up (three nights tops, I say).
At 2.5 they are eating the full range of calcium rich foods, they don't need any kind of milk at all, night time or otherwise!

littlejohnnydory · 01/03/2015 10:21

Why did you give a bottle to a two year old in the first place?!

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specialsubject · 01/03/2015 11:02

you are being played like a violin. Just because she is short doesn't mean she isn't smart.

take charge.

NickyEds · 01/03/2015 11:09

Why am I doing 4 bottles a night for a 2.5 year old?

Yes, why the hell are you doing 4 bottles a night for a nearly two year old!?! At 2 she should not be having bottles in the night. Just say no!

NickyEds · 01/03/2015 11:10

Why did you think bf would prevent this?

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