Firstly, I feel like an absolute shit. And the longer I leave it the worse it gets.
My 'aunt' (best friend of my mum) lives in Ireland, no children and doted on us from a distance growing up. I love her to bits. For Christmas she gave me €100 and £20. This is a huge sum of money. She is this generous every Christmas and birthday. I had written all but her thank you letter by NYE. On NY Day my fiancé and partner of 5 years split up with me more or less out of the blue. I was very ill at the time and so the next few weeks were a blur of packing (mostly supervising others, I wasn't fit enough), tears and trying to hold onto my job (I had been ill for some months - at least I found out where he stood on 'in sickness and in health' before the wedding!). My Mum explained to my aunt what had happened immediately and said my letter might take some time.
I settled into my new place and a week later my uncle (aunt's husband) died. Then I had a week to write the letter and post it separately to the condolence letter and I didn't, because I didn't know what to write.
We have a pre planned trip to see her next weekend. I still don't know what to say (other than thank you, obviously, but I usually write pages to her, at least 5). I have thought about this letter nearly every night for weeks.
I feel like January was just about excusable , but it is March tomorrow and, to quote my mother, "it is an insult" that I haven't written yet. Mum, who knows my aunt best, saying she doesn't have any suggestions and can't decide whether I should write now or drop it. I don't want to drop it, but I don't want to insult my aunt either and have no idea what to say... I have to post it on Monday for it to have a chance of getting to Ireland before we do on Saturday.
Suggestions please? I need a wider range of opinions from people who value that you letters (few of my friends do them so would probably say to leave it).
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AIBU?
AIBU to ask for help with this thank you letter? Bereaved aunt.
12 replies
CadInWales · 28/02/2015 22:34
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