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AIBU?

AIBU to want to go boo hoo hahaha when men say they feel excluded by the the term "feminist"

368 replies

GoddessWhoWalksEarthAsWoman · 28/01/2015 23:39

Just wondering if anyone else thinks like me...Go.

OP posts:
FarFromAnyRoad · 28/01/2015 23:41

Nope. I would find that attitude quite draining and a bit unhealthy. But that's just me - clearly you're very happy with yourself OP so - well - errr - meh.

GingerCuddleMonster · 28/01/2015 23:44

Well if that's how you feel, that's how you feel about it. Crack on.

FeckTheMagicDragon · 28/01/2015 23:44

my initial response in my head to that was 'Bo-fuckin'-Ho'

One side of me thinks if we didn't have to fight this fight, you wouldn't feel excluded, and also - don;t dictate to women what we call the ongoing fight for equality. The more amiable side of me thinks, you should to be on our side, but don't dictate to women what we call the ongoing fight for equality.

avocadotoast · 28/01/2015 23:45

Nah, I know what you mean OP. It's generally my knee jerk reaction tbh.

Hamiltoes · 28/01/2015 23:46

Sorry I'm with far.

In my opinion gender equality will only happen when the gender divide stops. "Boo hooing" someone on the sole basis of their gender goes completely against what gender equality stands for.

God that was hard to get my head around. Confused

trufflesnout · 28/01/2015 23:46

How to spot a cunty man: "I don't believe in feminism, I believe in egalitarianism" (said with despairing sighs & patronising looks)

PetulaGordino · 28/01/2015 23:54

I don't feel so much "boo hoo hahaha" as that it's not really my problem

AntiHop · 28/01/2015 23:56

For feminism to be successful, men have to lose some of their power and privilege. So it's not surprising some men feel excluded. That's the point. Decent men who believe in feminism will accept that men need to lose power and privilege in favour of women, to even things out.

MrsTawdry · 28/01/2015 23:57

Me too OP.

Oh the poor, marginalized fuckers.

MrsTawdry · 28/01/2015 23:58

Anti exactly! My DH (father of daughters) is looking forward to the day he can say with absolute honesty that the world is equal for men and women alike.

OhAhhMissus · 29/01/2015 00:14

The younger me would have been all hand wringing over eglatarianism.

Now I just think what a twat. I've never met anyone who felt excluded by feminism or who thought that it'd gone too far who wasn't a shining example of why feminism is sorely needed.

MoominKoalaAndMiniMoom · 29/01/2015 00:24

I look back at my 'Ooh no I'm an egalitarian' phase and cringe at how twatty I was.

SorchaN · 29/01/2015 00:45

I don't really care if men feel excluded. That's their problem, not mine.

MrsTerryPratchett · 29/01/2015 00:47

How to spot a cunty man: "I don't believe in feminism, I believe in egalitarianism" Answer to this is, "Great! So what have you done to fight for egalitarianism, you wank badger?". Because my theory would be; fuck all.

Leontine · 29/01/2015 01:16

What's wrong with egalitarianism and why does someone believing in it make them a twat?

BuggersMuddle · 29/01/2015 01:47

Umm, no. Assuming you're a female, I'd be delighted to know why. I label myself as a feminist. I don't label myself as a radical feminist and I have zero interest in getting involved in the trans debate.

My DP would is happy to label himself feminist despite being male. It doesn't always mean he walks the talk, but at least we have a starting point of agreement at least.

EBearhug · 29/01/2015 02:16

I failed to show any sympathy when male colleagues complained that a meeting dominated by women would be intimidating. I pointed out I had to deal with the opposite every single day of my working life, so maybe they might start to get an inkling of what it's like.

But apparently that's different.

FreudiansSlipper · 29/01/2015 02:20

why would a man feel excluded

yes I would roll my eyes too. they would go on to say something like its gone too far now then sadly be backed up by a few desperate to be on the mens side women :(

Tinks42 · 29/01/2015 02:24

Im 52 and been on mumsnet for 6 years. Ive resigned myself to being single now forever Grin Rather that than ever spending time with a dickhead man that believes my place is to be beneath him in every sense of the word Grin

QueenTilly · 29/01/2015 02:58

I have never encountered an "egalitarian" who ddn't spend a lot of time criticising feminism and absolute no sodding time campaigning (even in discussion) for equality in any of the issues traditionally associted with egalitarianism. They never exactly seem to have subscriptions to the New Internationalist, for example. But I've even heard "I'm an egalitarian because I'm happy to fight for everyone". Words do not make deeds, especially when I've seen your posting history!

Also the same kind of people who say "feminism has been taken over". What exactly do they think they're doing to the word "egalitarian"?

trufflesnout · 29/01/2015 03:39

I look back at my 'Ooh no I'm an egalitarian' phase and cringe at how twatty I was.

We all went there probably, the difference is we left it behind Grin

MrsTerryPratchett · 29/01/2015 05:31

What's wrong with egalitarianism and why does someone believing in it make them a twat? Good question.

There are two answers. One, because it always is twats saying it. Two, because feminism, in the broad sense, is about equality. It just acknowledges that women don't have it yet, something that egalitarianism doesn't. Exactly what the twat wants. Not to acknowledge inequality.

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Caronaim · 29/01/2015 06:03

men ARE excluded and disadvantaged in many situations. it is no nicer from them that it is for us.

FayKorgasm · 29/01/2015 06:33

Caronaim women and girls are far more disadvantaged globally,this is a fact.

PetulaGordino · 29/01/2015 07:06

Excluded by the term feminist though Caronaim? As bullshit as me saying I am excluded by the term anti-racist

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