Just a rant more than anything........ as I think I ANBU but I'm sure my DH thinks I am!
My DH is notoriously bad with money, he thinks nothing of wandering into Tesco / M&S Food, spending £100+ and coming out with enough to cook 2 meals and a load of tat inc £4 a pack ham that gets chucked in the bin because it doesn't get eaten in time, posh individual cheesecakes, party food, you get the idea.
He also really spoils his 2DD's 10 and 14, (My DSD's), mainly trying to make up for their useless Mother (she's an alcoholic and is always building up the kids hopes then letting them down, long story), which I have no problem with as long as we can afford it.
We are currently trying to save a house deposit (so we can be nearer the , well to be exact, I have saved £7k and my DH has put in £1k, but asked for £200 of that back 2 weeks ago as he "needed" a new part for his car.
He is a mechanic and earns OK ish money, plus homers but is always being "skint" 2 weeks after payday despite never ever saying no to the girls, even if they don't ask for anything he still insists on spending at least £80 on a trip to the pictures / bowling + a meal at least once a week and spending at least £100 a month on clothes for them. Again I have no problem with this WHEN we have the money. He would rather die than say "no sorry kids we can't afford it" if they asked to go see
I know a lot of people will say we are married so should share finances, but I refuse to for the reasons above, plus his credit rating is trashed (mainly to do with his ex in fairness, tho he certainly hasn't helped)
and mine is great. The new house purchase will be in my name alone.
OK so that's the back story (sorry!)
The last couple of weeks things have been a bit tight in terms of disposable income, but we got all the presents paid for blah blah blah. I let him use my credit card (apx £200) and he said he had a pot of £ from jobs he had done with a mate after work and that would be getting split this week and he would pay me back then.
Anyway he took the kids to the pictures last weekend (I stayed in to sort the house) , and as soon as I came through the door my heart sank. He was laden down with bags from Marks and Spencers, Next, blah blah blah. At a guess he had spent circa £300 on Christmas outfits for the kids (even though he bought them both a new xmas outfit a few weeks ago), extra Christmas presents for people we have already bought plenty for, and loads of snack food from marks and spencers. He then pulls out a "present" for me, a £18 candle, and gives me a kiss. I felt like screaming, honestly.
Then today I speak to him and ask for the money so I can pay the credit card and he goes all quiet. I said I thought he was getting the £ from the pot at work and he says " well I used that last week (ie. for the shopping trip) as I was a bit skint", then doesn't say anything for a couple of seconds and begrudgingly says "ok I'll get it for you".
He said to me previously he wants to have a minimum of £500 put aside, so we can have days out with the kids over the holidays........
He just seems to splurge money like water and live a champagne lifestyle, while I put all my spare money towards a new house (and tbh the only reason we are moving is so that DSDs can be nearer their school and friends, I'm leaving the area where all my friends are and I love living in). If it was left to him the new house would NEVER happen. I just feel like he'd rather buy the kids another new outfit rather than put it towards a house so they can be nearer their school and friends.
Again, sorry just a rant really....... He's not all bad, I guess we just have differing attitudes to money (hence why we keep our finances separate)
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
to be really peeved with my DH? LONG, sorry!
32 replies
19lottie82 · 24/12/2014 10:00
OP posts:
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.