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AIBU?

To want to deliberately wind up and antagonise an arrogant work colleague....

29 replies

JellyDiamonds · 04/09/2014 00:08

Just for the fun of it?...

I absolutely hate arrogant people, they have always been one of my pet hates and unfortunately I've recently been lumbered with an arrogant cock of a colleague. I'm a school escort and I've been lucky in that I've always got on well with my drivers, until now. He's been offhand for me from the moment I got into the taxi on the first day of term, for no apparent reason.

He loves endlessly telling me about his life such as what he's got and all he things he's gong to buy, but when I try and keep the conversation going and reply he'll get really arsy with me. I suspect he just likes boasting and his ego can't hack it when I tell him that I've got something he has, or be somewhere he has, or I get one over on him. We are supposed to be equals but he's attempted to belittle me and put me in my place a few times but I keep standing firm, and I know he's getting really rattled over this.

Anyway, I don't give a shit about what he says to me. Water of a ducks back, but it's extended to the children on the run now and I've think he's crossed a line and I'm not having it. One of the little girls on the run today tried to point out a different way to her home, and he turned to me and said "I love it when these kids try and tell a taxi driver where to go" written down it doesn't sound bad, but the way he said was in a don't tell me what to do kind of way. I said, "oh she's only trying to be helpful" I mean she's eleven for gods sake, and his reply "yeah well I'm a taxi driver, I know where I'm going".

The "I'm a taxi driver" line is now a catchphrase, like he's someone really important. I'm not belittling what he does, but I think he seems to think it gives him some kind of power and gives no one else to the right to question him. I've now spent the whole evening trying to think of a witty comeback for the "I'm a taxi driver" line, it's pathetic. He's a knob, and I know I should let to go, but I really really hate people like this and I want to bring him down a peg or two.

AIBU to feel this way?

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WooWooOwl · 04/09/2014 00:15

YANBU to feel like it, but you can't argue with fools unless you get down to their level.

Just remain professional.

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JellyDiamonds · 04/09/2014 00:21

I know your right WooWoo but I just think people like that need bringing down a peg or two. It's infuriating, and I swear if I hear about about his holiday to Greece again. Honestly this is no word of a lie on the first day he said to mr "I'm your new driver, I'll be with you all the time now expect for the last week of September when I'm going to Greece all inclusive" it was such an odd thing to day, anyone else would say they were just going on holiday wouldn't they?

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Bulbasaur · 04/09/2014 00:27

The thing with showing arrogant little shits up, is they don't settle down, they just get more nasty to nurse their bruised ego.

I wouldn't bother. He's not worth your time.

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JellyDiamonds · 04/09/2014 00:32

Oh if he ever got nasty with me I'd be straight on the phone to the council to report him, who in turn would report him to his boss. I do have the upper hand here you see...

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AlpacaYourThings · 04/09/2014 00:35

He sounds like a twat.

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JellyDiamonds · 04/09/2014 00:37

Oh he is a twat, he was showing off his wonderful new Sony phone to me today apparently the best phones ever. You should have seen his face when I then pulled an Iphone out of my bag.....

Wanker!

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LuvDaMorso · 04/09/2014 01:09

Do you have to converse?

Surely madam's driver should be quiet if that is her wish?

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LiberalLibertines · 04/09/2014 02:12

I'd not talk to him tbh. He may make that difficult, but just answer with hmmms and he'll give up (hopefully).

Tempting as it may be, I wouldn't wind him up deliberately.

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MrsWinnibago · 04/09/2014 02:26

I think it sounds like you're lowering yourself. Why do you care that he sees your iphone? Rise above it for God's sake and then he will cease. He knows you're irritated and thinks he's in a competition with you now. Stop chatting with him or keeping the conversation going...keep it to business.

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singaporeswing · 04/09/2014 02:39

I have one of these. She's just started and swans around like she is the boss.

I call her Elevenerife - because if you have been to Tenerife, she has been Elevenerife.

She talks incessantly about this amazing restaurant she has been to and how she is VIP for this bar. As soon as you start talking, she looks away and acts like she isn't listening. She is just bloody rude.

I deal with it by sitting there and saying "that's nice" repeatedly and plugging in headphones.

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Flangeshrub · 04/09/2014 04:03

I can see how annoying that is but you do sound over preoccupied with this guy. You want to 'beat' him and if he's an idiot what does this make you?

Are you insecure about material things? Why did you get your iPhone out? Who cares what this muppet says?

Let it go. Ignoring him will cause him more pain than a 'witty comeback' as he will only play harder and faster if you reply and you will give this guy even more headspace than you do already.

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CarbeDiem · 04/09/2014 05:03

Another saying don't wind him up.
Yes he's a dick and in your shoes I'd probably like to tell him to stfu but you've still got to work with him so better to try and stay professional.

It will bother him more if you stop engaging. People like him don't like it when you don't fawn, inflate their ego or appear enthralled.

Out of curiosity do you live in the NE in a Town beginning with S because I've used a taxi driver a few times over the last few months and he sounds like the one your describing, even down to the AI holiday in September to Greece :)

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ilovesooty · 04/09/2014 05:53

He really knows how to push your buttons doesn't he?
Just be professional and cease to engage as others have said.

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JessieMcJessie · 04/09/2014 06:56

Can you put one of the kids in the front seat (maybe with headphones on) and you sit in the back behind him? He doesn't so much sound arrogant as just crashingly, crashingly dull and boring. Like many a London taxi driver I have met. The problem is that people like that probably won't even notice if you stop engaging with them or try to bait them, it's all one way conversation about me me me.

Only 3 weeks to go till he sods off on holiday. Maybe you'll bond well with his replacement and you can hatch up a plan between you to get him re-assigned..

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NorksAreMesssy · 04/09/2014 07:03

George Bernard Shaw said
"never wrestle with a pig, you will both get dirty, and besides, the pig enjoys it"

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GoblinLittleOwl · 04/09/2014 07:29

Do you realize how arrogant you sound?

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Hissy · 04/09/2014 07:35

i'd be inclined to say that 'actually, a taxi driver should be concentrating on driving rather than blathering on about stuff, so let's focus on the jobs we're paid to do and not about boasting about this and that'

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londonrach · 04/09/2014 07:49

Raise above it.

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AdamLambsbreath · 04/09/2014 07:53

That is an excellent quote norks.

GBS is right. It's really difficult to ignore knobs (I've had to work with some prime ones - in the same room, 8 hours a day including lunch breaks, for three years, so I know of what I speak) but arguing with them or attempting to compete with them only fuels them.

The best thing you can think is that this man is not dominating: he's pathetic. Who boasts about their phone? To a stranger in their cab? Who is so desperate for someone - anyone - to think they're special?

Someone who is vastly, vastly insecure.

You've already won. Bear that in mind, and brush him off.

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MyFairyKing · 04/09/2014 08:07

You don't sound much better than him to be honest!

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nilbyname · 04/09/2014 08:15

Kill him with kindness-

Yes dear, oh how nice for you. Etc etc.

Talk to the kids your with. Leave him be.

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ilovesooty · 04/09/2014 08:22

I agree Fairy
They sound as bad as each other.

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TiggyD · 04/09/2014 09:40

He says "I'm a taxi driver"

You reply "like in that film?"

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TalcumPowder · 04/09/2014 11:51

By the sound of it he's less arrogant than he is a crashing, gruesome bore. Surely most adult human beings realise that other people's holidays/gadgets are about as interesting as other people's dreams?

You are falling into the classic 'socialised to be polite and interested' female trap of keeping the conversation going, and now you're descending to his level by I stilling a gadget rivalry. Just look out the window and leave a long pause before you say 'Oh... Really?' at intervals, or talk to the child you're escorting. You're not obliged to be this man's conversational playmate.

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ChickenMe · 04/09/2014 12:47

Yanbu. Don't engage with him emotionally-these kind of people emotionally rip you off. Be bland, barely interested. I worked one shift with a guy like this and omg it was draining. He is terribly insecure and socially inept. It's all a cover up ANC it's so transparent. Just like your cabbie. I resorted to looking bored and ignoring him with my best "woteva" face.

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