To want answers to these questions on Scottish Independence.

[Roseformeplease]

What, exactly, will the price of gin be? And will there still be lemons?

Will Simon Cowell be welcome or will there be a ban?

I am fed up of sterling, NHS, sterling, trident, blah blah blah.

There are more important issues that should be addressed by both sides. Please post your questions here.

[Roseformeplease]

We may even get answers. Who knows!

[Roseformeplease]

Who gets George Galloway?

[Roseformeplease]

Anyone else?

[OldLadyKnowsSomething]

I don't buy gin, but the price may rise if SG push through minimum alcohol pricing. There will still be lemons, donated by unhappy No voters.

Mr Cowell will be welcome, but unlikely to visit as he recommended No and will be fearful of invasions from space, the collapse of western civilisation and our defencelessness against international terrorism.

Mr Galloway has stated a desire to be FM in an iScotland, but given he's a fairly rabid No, we're likely to permit him to be Court Jester when Brenda visits.

[WorraLiberty]

Will England still get Scottish shortbread at Christmas, or do I have to send someone to smuggle it over the border?

[Sallyingforth]

Will I still get my oats in the morning?

[TheDeathOfRats]

I don't like men in kilts. Will I be branded a traitor and imprisoned?

[Mrsjayy]

Will I need to get my english friend to sky plus eastenders for me

[WorraLiberty]

Mrsjayy, I'll trade you for the shortbread

And a bottle of Buckfast

[MrsTerryPratchett]

Will haggis be allowed over the border? I can't get it imported in Canada so will rUK be the same?

[Mrsjayy]

Deal sounds like a party

[OldLadyKnowsSomething]

Scotland will still continue to export both shortbread and oats. Edinburgh Rock and tablet will, however, require further negotiations.

Not liking men in kilts will require at least one public apology, to be broadcast live, and Eastenders will be protected by nicking it from ROI international treaty.

[Ultracrepidarian]

Will the English reinstate the wall and will we on the other side have to run around with blue face paint shouting about freedom.
Will I need a passport to visit my auntie?
Will we get free whisky to vote yes?

[Mrsjayy]

Will I be searched at the border for buckfast shortbread

[Roseformeplease]

I would like a further guarantee that all soaps will be carefully scrutinised for ridiculous plot lines before being shown.


Also, men in kilts - kilts will be compulsory for all fit men in the event of a No vote. Tartan trousers will be banned, especially on politicians.

[OldLadyKnowsSomething]

Ultra, now you're being silly. Of course woad and passports wil be compulsory.

[Mrsjayy]

Will irnbru stop exporting to england

[Roseformeplease]

Will there be cake?

[Mrsjayy]

If it is yes will eck ban english and will there be forced gaelic lessons

[WorraLiberty]

Will the English reinstate the wall

Yes, we're looking at 3 Polish builder's estimates right now

[OldLadyKnowsSomething]

Mrsjayy, it may have to be smuggled. :(

Cake? Dundee cake mandatory!

[StairsInTheNight]

My friend said all gingers will be sent north as honorary Scots if it's a yes vote

[Mrsjayy]

Yes black bun and dumpling and scones wil be the cake of the scots

[OldLadyKnowsSomething]

No forced gaelic lessons, but I have heard rumours about Welsh and Cornish.

[NCforAye]

Crucially, we will keep the pandas.