To get the police involved?

(63 Posts)
MagersfonteinLugg Sun 17-Aug-14 22:19:44

I will try to cut a long story short.
New family on the street, 2 boys age 11 low level bullying of my DS (6) on the park across the street. They broke our wall, and I took the trampoline down in the back garden because they kept throwing stones over the fence which ended up hitting my DS on the shoulder. Told the parents who made them apologise, but the little incidents kept happening (broken scooter, swearing at them, etc)
Last week one of the twins threw DS onto the ground and broke his collarbone. Spent all evening in A&E getting x-ray and assessment. He was given a sling to wear but no plaster cast obviously.
Informed the parents who promised to sort it and keep their boys away, but low level harrassment continued all week. Their main beef is that they don't believe he has a broken collar bone so call him a liar out on the park, etc.
Today they harrassed my DD and DN whilst they were picking blacberries and swore at them then they thre Dss scooter into the brook. This evening I heard them effing and blinding at DD again.
It takes a lot to rile me but I lost it and called the police who were very nice and told me I had done the right thing. They arranged to visit me on Tuesday.
DD was on the park so I went out to fetch her in. THEY were also there and started about DS again, how he was a liar and his collar bone was not broken and I was lying just to get them into trouble. I was calm and told them that we would see what the police thought about when they came to see me, then went inside with DD.
5 mins later I had a huge bodybuilding skinhead on my doorstep shouting abuse in my face and telling to stop f***ing overreacting. I explained this needed to be sorted as he had not done anything to stop the harrassment and he basically told me to F***k off, along with another member of his family who came along .
I just told him to leave and the police would sort it.
I was really upset and shaken, but I really don't think IABU to involve the police in the first place.
Was I?

MagersfonteinLugg Sun 17-Aug-14 23:04:13

I think it also makes it worse that DCs dad also thinks I am "overreacting". Is this just a male view or what? Am I just be over protective and should just let kids be kids as EXDH says?
Its okay for him, he doesn't have to wipe away the tears as he's not here.

Goldmandra Sun 17-Aug-14 23:10:15

I think it also makes it worse that DCs dad also thinks I am "overreacting". Is this just a male view or what?

His children are bullying your children and now he is trying to bully you. He knows you are not overreacting and he is using his size and aggression to try to intimidate you so that you will not involve the police.

Log everything, however small so that the police can tell him to back off or face the consequences.

AgentZigzag Sun 17-Aug-14 23:10:18

Your ex is a wanker too, which is why he's an ex at a guess?

You're not overreacting, is he really trying to pass off a child bullying and breaking his 6 YOs collarbone as kids being kids?

Does your DS know he thinks that little of him?

Shazam24 Sun 17-Aug-14 23:28:16

You are definetly not over reacting!

HauntedNoddyCar Sun 17-Aug-14 23:34:10

How does your ex think you should protect the dc from further harm?

MagersfonteinLugg Sun 17-Aug-14 23:41:38

He thinks I have just made things worse.
But I can't just sit back and wait till something else happens, can I?

ddubsgirl77 Mon 18-Aug-14 00:19:36

No you cant you have done the right thing! No wonder hes an ex if he thinks ok for a woman to be threatened in her own home! Pls pls report what happened to the police

Chiana Mon 18-Aug-14 04:26:24

Report. Report. Report. Log every incident, as others have said. And pay no attention to your XH. Do they rent or own?

Good luck.

Mumof3xox Mon 18-Aug-14 05:47:24

You are doing the right thing op

Keep reporting these people

As for your ex, why is he not more concerned that his sons collarbone was broken by a child nearly twice his age!

petalsandstars Mon 18-Aug-14 06:18:01

Ring 101 and tell them about the intimidation as well from the thugs.

TestingTestingWonTooFree Mon 18-Aug-14 07:23:57

The collarbone and abusive adults tip this into police territory. Good luck sorting it out.

Eva50 Mon 18-Aug-14 07:47:33

You have done the right thing. You have to be seen to safeguard your little boy. That he has needed hospital treatment for a non accidental injury will be in his hospital records and if he has another incident or "accident" requiring hospital treatment or even something he metions at school you may get a call from a HV or school nurse. You have to document everything to cover yourself. I wouldn't let him play out of the garden unsupervised at the moment.

MagersfonteinLugg Mon 18-Aug-14 22:48:08

Well we have had a whole day of "intimidation" from the whole family which has left me feeling scared and very down.
I am considering asking the police to not contact the parents after all as the hassle from them can only get worse.

Goldmandra Mon 18-Aug-14 22:51:30

I think that telling the police to back off would be the worst thing you could do. It tells them that they can do whatever they like and get away with it.

Have you contacted them today about the intimidation?

Waltermittythesequel Mon 18-Aug-14 22:53:38

You have told them now so there's no point in worrying about it!

But you must see it through. Tell the police of the further intimidation. I'm sorry that you and your dc are going through this.

gamerchick Mon 18-Aug-14 22:54:52

It doesn't matter now they won't leave you alone if you drop it.

Tell The police everything and they'll get quite stern with them. Then everything after that, ring them up. Let the police do their jobs.

justmyview Mon 18-Aug-14 22:55:33

Poor you, that sounds grim. Are the horrible neighbours renting their house? If so, it may be worth reporting to the landlord. In Scotland, landlords have to register with their local authority. If they fail to address anti-social behaviour (eg by evicting the tenants) then it could make it harder to keep their landlord registration. This can give the landlord an incentive to take action. Is there something similar where you are?

itiswhatitiswhatitis Mon 18-Aug-14 22:57:16

You really must let the police deal with this otherwise it will continue and get worse.

MiscellaneousAssortment Mon 18-Aug-14 23:04:50

I think you need to phone the police about this threatening behaviour rather than just wait til Tuesday - though it's a bit late now.

The police may think you're not that scared unless you keep reporting these things at the time. You need to make sure that you're reporting things in the right way to get as much help as possible, these people sound like bullying thugs who will continue to bully if they think it's working.

HangingBasketCase Mon 18-Aug-14 23:10:14

I'd have rung the police again as soon as this moronic chav threatened you on your door step.

Do not let this scummy family get away with this.

Whereisegg Mon 18-Aug-14 23:10:47

Yy keep ringing 101!
Your poor ds and dd cake

Selks Mon 18-Aug-14 23:24:03

Unfortunately you have to see this through now. If you give up, the neighbours will know and will feel that they can do whatever they like - they will make your lives hell.
If they live in a council or housing association property do put in a complaint about them to the housing office. There is often quite a bit they can do.

MyLegIsHaunted Tue 19-Aug-14 03:29:22

You've done the right thing. Your poor little ds had his bone broken by these kids. Unacceptable.
Let the police handle it now, just keep reporting any more incidents to them.
I know what it's like to feel trapped in my own house by people like this so thanks

TheMaddHugger Tue 19-Aug-14 06:04:08

bullies only understand one fucking thing. That's someone that stands up to them.

Don't back down.

Bring the War.

* knowledge by experience.

TestingTestingWonTooFree Tue 19-Aug-14 06:13:17

Witness intimidation is a crime in itself and is usually treated seriously. I don't think you should back down, try and stay strong!

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