To think a hair free bikini line isn't more important than my own family?

(163 Posts)
youmademesolate Sat 12-Jul-14 13:39:31

I am a care assistant.

There's never enough time to do everything. Today I was due to finish at 11 o clock and then had a special family event I wanted to go to (nothing formal) at 12.

The last lady was duly washed, dressed, bed changed, breakfast made, lounge cleaned (she is unable to walk herself so all this done using hoists and so on.) she asked me to put hair removal cream on her bikini line and I explained, politely, we just didn't have the time it would take to set and then remove the hair.

The husband has complained to the agency about me angry

I'm so fed up; why should I work for nothing at all, miss my own family doing things and for someone's bikini line???

ThinkIveBeenHacked Sat 12-Jul-14 13:41:11

Could you have passed on the request to the persn stepping in after you? Rather than a blanket no.

youmademesolate Sat 12-Jul-14 13:41:52

What person?

WorraLiberty Sat 12-Jul-14 13:42:18

Of course you shouldn't. If you were finished work then you were finished work.

However, I do hope the lady or the people you work with don't spot this.

I would imagine the info you've given would make that pretty easy, if they work with you.

fluffydoge Sat 12-Jul-14 13:42:24

God no of course YANBU surely removing hair from someone's bikini line is not in your job description? Seems far to personal to me, even for a care assistant.

youmademesolate Sat 12-Jul-14 13:43:05

Oh I see what you mean - no, she doesn't have a live in carer. There are 4 visits a day: breakfast, lunch, tea and supper. Time is really tight and there's no way the lunchtime visit would have time to undress her, put the cream on, wait for it to take hold, remove it, dress her again and then make her lunch!!

youmademesolate Sat 12-Jul-14 13:43:30

That's why I namechanged worra

JaceyBee Sat 12-Jul-14 13:44:30

Yanbu, she should have asked you to do it earlier while you were washing her. Sure the husband can do it himself if he's that bothered!

I wouldn't have though that that level of personal grooming would fall under the remit of any carer other than full-time live-in, whether you were running over time or not!

cathpip Sat 12-Jul-14 13:45:25

I thought that bikini lines were done by qualified beauticians not care assistants (not slating your profession as I think care assistants do a sterling job for very little money!). Maybe the husband could get off his arse and do the bikini line? Instead of complaining.....

"The husband has complained to the agency about me"
Is there any good reason that he couldn't attend to her bikini line for her?

DontPutMeDownForCardio Sat 12-Jul-14 13:46:13

Is that really in your job description! ? Yanbu. Her husband could do it.

quietbatperson Sat 12-Jul-14 13:46:25

YANBU. But even if you namechanged, it is a very identifiable situation. I would advise asking MNHQ nicely to pull this thread.

Featherbag Sat 12-Jul-14 13:46:48

I wouldn't think intimate hair removal falls under the remit of a carer - what if you left the cream on too long and burnt her? You wouldn't be insured I wouldn't have thought. No way would I do this.

Putting on her hair removal cream ......on her bikini line! shock

No way would I do that , surely that's not right?

gingercat2 Sat 12-Jul-14 13:47:47

I'm guessing that you only have a certain amount of time to spend with this lady, maybe an hour? And that this amount of time is either what she pays for or is funded for. And that your regular duties have been pre-agreed and put on a care plan or similar document. So it sounds very reasonable that you leave when your time is up. If she was really keen to have her bikini line done, she should have negotiated that with you when you first arrived and maybe substituted that for another task.

youmademesolate Sat 12-Jul-14 13:48:38

I think most situations on here are pretty identifiable tbh. The husband wouldn't be able to do it as they're both disabled, in fairness, I'm just fed up with having unreasonable demands made of me time and time again!

Scabetty Sat 12-Jul-14 13:49:14

Do you do facials and French manicures too? I would think this goes above and beyond essential care surely?

youmademesolate Sat 12-Jul-14 13:49:20

An hour, if only, half an hour grin

Batmansbuttocks Sat 12-Jul-14 13:51:33

It's all about WHEN she asked you. If there was plenty of time when she asked you then YABU. If she asked you with 10 mins to go then no YANBU and of course you couldn't help.

You don't sound like you like this client and you sound resentful that she wanted this job done.

Bikini line with razor/cream falls under personal care if anyone is doubting that. One of the issues of the modern world looking after younger people.

WorraLiberty Sat 12-Jul-14 13:52:03

I think my point may have whooshed you somewhat grin

I meant if your work colleagues or the woman herself spotted this, would you not be in trouble at work?

I didn't mean they could nose through your past posts grin

zzzzz Sat 12-Jul-14 13:53:59

Do you feel this IS part of your job?

Batmansbuttocks Sat 12-Jul-14 13:53:59

No one, and I repeat no one likes a full bush these days grin

Kundry Sat 12-Jul-14 13:54:06

I hope your agency responds by making it clear that you have 1 hour only to complete all the tasks and bikini line hair falls into beautician rather than carer territory.

Are they paying privately or via social services? If private they can buy a long enough time slot to complete all the task they would like. Social services - er, no.

youmademesolate Sat 12-Jul-14 13:54:06

Batmans, not quite. The waiting for the cream, even if applied at the start of the session, would have meant I was late so no matter when I was asked I'd have politely had to say no.

Worra to be totally honest, I wanted a whinge and a moan, and I'm certainly not the only person to write about work on here so thanks for your point but I'm not actually bothered about that just at the moment.

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