Are there double standards in the media regarding DV?

(33 Posts)
Chippednailvarnish Tue 24-Jun-14 19:50:30

Melaine Sykes is featuring in OK magazine, after recently accepting a police caution for an assault on her then husband.
AIBU to think a man who did the same to his wife wouldn't be back on the front page?

Hoppinggreen Tue 24-Jun-14 19:55:50

I was quite horrified about all the jokes and the general attitude to Beyonces sister hitting Jay Z.
If his brother had hit Beyoncé while he just watched there would have been an uproar.
So yes, I think that there are double standards

CoffeeTea103 Tue 24-Jun-14 19:58:06

Definite double standards.

Nomama Tue 24-Jun-14 19:58:44

Ms Brooks, is another instance - OK, wrong type of front page?

David Soul.... at the height of his fame.
Saatchi
Sean Penn
The no longer sainted Bill Cosby
Nick Cage
John Lennon

I could go on. Fame has a tendency to allow the Lethe to wash over such things.

NewtRipley Tue 24-Jun-14 20:00:19

Roman Polanski
Jim Davidson
Stan Collymore
Berm

Lots more I can't recall at the moment

John Denver.

Chippednailvarnish Tue 24-Jun-14 20:03:54

I suppose I'm thinking more about Melanie Sykes as she's actually being featured in the magazine, it's not just an article about her.

After all I can't imagine Saatchi being paid to pose in his swimming trunks...
Looking at men more recently involved with DV, I can't think of anyone male who has done something similar, but I'm not a huge reader of magazines.

Sean Connery.

Take your pick, Chris Brown.

Although I still do think there is a double standard.

OberonTheHopeful Tue 24-Jun-14 20:09:35

This is a sensitive topic for me, but I can't say I've noticed a particular media double standard, as the examples cited by previous posters show. I think the same thing also happens with other serious crimes (e.g. Jeffrey Archer).

I have to confess though, I have no idea who Melanie Sykes actually is, or what she has done blush.

Nomama Tue 24-Jun-14 20:11:35

(I too have no idea who she is..... maybe that makes us OK people, Oberon smile)

(Eeek, just realised that infers people who do know who she is are NOT OK people...erm.... hellfire smile)

FreudiansSlipper Tue 24-Jun-14 20:14:25

we do not see men as being victims in the same way as they have the physical strength to usually defend themselves

that highlights the miss understanding around dv issues

there are many men in the public eye that have been known to have been violent towards their partners and it has not had an impact on their career, if anything their partners will be judged if they stayed with them

Chippednailvarnish Tue 24-Jun-14 20:15:16

Don't worry Melaine Sykes hasn't done much to worry about missing.

Maybe what I'm trying to say is that most (admittedly not all) of the men listed here either weren't convicted or the DV came into common knowledge a while after it occurred. Maybe that makes it more palatable for the media?

Nomama Tue 24-Jun-14 20:15:21

Lesley Ash, for example....

Chippednailvarnish Tue 24-Jun-14 20:17:56

What's the story with Lesley Ash?

Nicolas cage??
Leslie ash was a victim I thibk but that was a long time ago, umlikely to pop up now

can I be the first to mention cheryl cole?

Nomama Tue 24-Jun-14 20:39:43

I know, Nic Cage, drunk and abusive... taunting police. He has a history apparently.

Lesley Ash, in the trout pout / MSRA scare. Beaten up (apparently systematically) by footballer... can anyone name him? But she was lambasted, at the time. Well, the papers started sympathetically, then got all intrusive, sister told her story (nasty nasty) and then.... I doubt any man would have had to defend themselves against such detailed and salacious nastiness.

Vintagecakeisstillnice Tue 24-Jun-14 20:45:02

So very very many men in the public eye basically just carry on, not saying this makes Mel Sykes publicity right, but just no different.

FFS look at how Wody Allen & Roman Poleniski are viewed by popular media.

I'd be more concerned about the way the media portrays stalking behaviour as romantic (but only if done by men).

That when they do show DV in a relationship it's either shown as a passionate relationship, a one off, or a monster of a wo/man who has been that way from day 1.

They don't show the drip drip effect that can turn a strong capable person in to a shadow.

To me this is giving the idea that either it's your fault for staying because you knew what you were getting in to.
It doesn't show that at least at the start most abusers aren't monsters, a lot of them are charming, attentive etc. After all why would you stay if they were a shit from date 1.

They don't show their true colours till you're in deep.

It's rare to see MC families shown dealing with domestic abuse in the media.

I will say that the more recent adverts using the Hollyoaks actors are more believable/ realistic. They don't show straight out beating up but the more insidious coercive type.

Moolin Tue 24-Jun-14 20:53:01

I was reading a trashy mag in the hairdressers yesterday.

Apparently Sam Faiers (sp?) has punched her boyfriend, Joey Essex, and he has admitted her is scared of her. I did wonder how well this would go down if it was the other way round...

Nomama Tue 24-Jun-14 20:54:43

Ah! I have heard of Joey Essex.... he can't blow his own nose? Is that right?

Moolin Tue 24-Jun-14 20:55:18

Also on Eastenders, Roxy Mitchell screaming at, shouting at and demanding things from her boyfriend on a regular basis, she's seen as a feisty woman. If it was the other way round it would be a storyline about emotional abuse

Moolin Tue 24-Jun-14 20:56:25

I really don't know, I'm not a fan and don't really follow sleb twaddle, honestly!

gordyslovesheep Tue 24-Jun-14 20:58:55

Michael Fassbender is another

CrotchMaven Tue 24-Jun-14 21:11:12

I think so, yes, but not for the reasons you seem to be talking about. Sykes is being treated just like a man of her profile who accepted a caution for DV i.e. as if it's a hiccup, but no-one cares that much about them anyway.

I do think there is a bias in society which downplays some violence against men by women. Violence in non self-defence situations is wrong, but we have a bizarre viewpoint as a society that results in all sorts of distorted messages.

However bear in mind that when stats are reported on, the correction of that bias often goes the other way, as if to make it an almost equal situation. For example, there was a recent campaign statng that 40% of DV victims are male which was widely reported on in the media. Bald fact it may be correct. However, if you actually read the detailed statistical reports, not only are incidents of DV actually more heavily weighted towards there being more incidents with a female as victim (men are far more likely to report after fewer incidences), but also I believe (correct me if I'm wrong) that some measures exclude sexual violence, as that is counted elsewhere. Not to mention that severity is not measured in anything like the detail that would make comparisons really meaningful. After all, chucking a glass of water over someone (minus the glass) would not have the same effect, physically or psychologically, as pinning someone down on a bed whilst threatening them with worse. However, both may be recorded as the same "type" of incident in the stats. And, of course, human nature being what it is, with most of us thinking that we are right, there may well be a chunk of reported incidents where the aggressor believes they were the victim, when the other party was acting in self-defence. (I am making no gender claims for much of that, merely suggesting that it's a far more complex situation socially and statistically than the media make out.)

WTF? I didn't know about Micheal Fassbender. He's off the list. Bloody hell, he's all chummy with Mark Kermode, who fancies himself a feminist. Urgh.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now