To be crapping myself about whose baby this is?

(86 Posts)
stateoftheart Mon 23-Jun-14 17:57:00

I cant believe this has happened to me!!

Period is 7 days late now. Tested Weds, negative. Tested today, very faint positive.

I have the copper coil in, i've checked and its still in place. I have no symptoms at all.

I have been seeing someone, we regularly have sex. But 8 days ago I had unprotected sex with someone else. Just the once. Given how faint the test is could it be his? But my periods was already nearly due then anyway.

About 14 days ago I had what I though was mid cycle bleed, this could have been implantation bleed??

But the test is so faint.

Oh god my head is everywhere.

Can anyone link to any conclusive evidence of whether there is a possibility. I have looked everywhere.

Showy Tue 24-Jun-14 11:44:20

You can conceive when your period is due, if you haven't ovulated yet. There's a thread on here at least weekly with a woman experiencing a very late period when she's usually regular as clockwork. Sometimes ovulation is delayed by stress or illness or occasionally for no discernible reason. The fact remains that the op does not know when she ovulated and for whatever reason, it's entirely plausible she ovulated recently.

This is not the pressing matter though. Seeing a gp asap and deciding what is right for her must take priority.

Chunderella Tue 24-Jun-14 08:33:11

I agree with phantom, you definitely need an STI test. The last thing you want is untreated chlamydia as well as everything else.

Happydaysatlast Tue 24-Jun-14 04:23:40

Op forget the father issue and concentrate on getting yourself to a doctor and making decisions on whether or not you wish to be a mother.

That's the first thing.

Cardinal Tue 24-Jun-14 03:14:54

Best of luck OP thanks

Morloth Tue 24-Jun-14 02:58:22

No judgment because there is nothing to judge.

Coil/ectopic is main thing and if you are having sex with more than one partner you really need to use a barrier contraception. Because they could be as well and so on...

Pregnancy isn't the worst thing you can catch.

ILoveCoreyHaim Tue 24-Jun-14 00:36:07

Never mind just seen clear blue positive

ILoveCoreyHaim Tue 24-Jun-14 00:34:27

Get a £1 test from savers. They showed up for me before i was even due on. Just them dip strips in the packet.

ILoveCoreyHaim Tue 24-Jun-14 00:31:01

Try again bloody autocorrect

My DM fell pg with DB2 on the pill so had the coil fitted then fell pg with DB3 with it in. Her strings vanished. This was in the early 90s

ILoveCoreyHaim Tue 24-Jun-14 00:29:36

My DO fell pg with DB2 on the pill so had the coil fitted then fell pg with DB with It in. Her strings vanished. This was in the early 90s

x2boys Tue 24-Jun-14 00:28:36

I agree with greythorne and young British piss artist do you want to be a mother ? If yes than you can worry about paternity later if not then its largely irrelavent good luck with your decision .

YoungBritishPissArtist Tue 24-Jun-14 00:18:49

I was just about to post what Greythorne said.

Never mind the father; do you want to be a mother?

Good luck whatever you do x

whois Tue 24-Jun-14 00:02:20

Good luck with whatever you decide OP.

Greythorne Mon 23-Jun-14 23:48:51

I think you are asking the wrong question, OP.

The true question is: do you want a baby?

If so, you can go it alone. Or you can think about whether you want one of these men in your life for the next 20 years.

If you don't want to have a baby, stop worrying about paternity and have a termination.

Bogeyface Mon 23-Jun-14 23:47:23

And also bear in mind that the men concerned can refuse to give samples for a DNA test unless ordered by a court or the CSA. So if you decide not to go down the CSA route, you may never know.

ICanSeeTheSun Mon 23-Jun-14 23:44:56

I would say going by the clear blue test you conceived 1-2 weeks ago making you 3-4 weeks pregnant.

I would say either of these men could be the father.

A DNA test will be the only way to find out who is the father but that's is 99.99% accurate.

If I had to bet though, I would say it's the first man child.

Bogeyface Mon 23-Jun-14 23:43:06

Look, chances are its the first guy. But it might, might not be.

So you need to make any decision based on those facts.

I have to admit that I am confused by your posts. Would you keep the baby if you could be sure that it was your casual hook up and definitely terminate if it was your ex husbands? In one post you seemed pretty certain that you would terminate but the fact that you are worrying about paternity indicates that you are considering keeping the baby.

Either way, there is a good chance you will be doing it alone so you need to think about whether you want to do that with possibly no involvement or support from the father.

whatever5 Mon 23-Jun-14 23:34:08

She could have ovulated later than normal whatever stress can delay ovulation so it is possible she was ovulating 8 days ago.

It's obviously possible but if OP's periods are normally regular there's no reason why she should have ovulated later. OP hasn't mentioned that she was under extreme stress last month.

TheEnchantedForest Mon 23-Jun-14 22:59:33

barefoot -that is one of the harshest comments I have ever read on here.

It really hope stateoftheart manages to ignore it and does what is right for her.

Sidthesausage Mon 23-Jun-14 22:53:10

Dating scans can be inaccurate by quite a few days

Sidthesausage Mon 23-Jun-14 22:52:07

I'd say its the first guys.

You can't conceive when your period is due and it sounds like the light bleed was implantation bleeding.

Sidthesausage Mon 23-Jun-14 22:49:34

I've spent years trying to conceive and read up a lot about conception to maximise chances.

- Ovulation usually happens mid cycle (day 14 in a 28 day cycle).
- you are fertile about 6 or days before till a day after ovulation
- implantation spotting usually happens day 7 till day 13.

STOPwiththehahaheheloling Mon 23-Jun-14 22:48:48

Barefoot "a bit off"? hmm that's entirely for the OP to decide and your personal views on it should not influence her decision. What wouldnt be ok for you would be fine for plenty others. Please dont order someone to terminate a pregnancy based on your own ideals.

LadyNexus Mon 23-Jun-14 22:47:28

Would one of those clear blue pregnancy tests that tell you how many weeks pregnant you are help?

If it's 2+ weeks then it's definitely the first guys.

Do you have he kind of relationship where you can talk about this with either/ both of the men involved?

It's always better to start honestly.

Barefootgirl Mon 23-Jun-14 22:43:44

To be honest, in the OP's shoes I would have a termination. Having a kid without knowing who its father is, or with a choice of fathers, is a bit off. Terminate this pregnancy, sort your coil and contraceptive methods out, and then start thinking about a family when you are a bit more settled.

CrispyFB Mon 23-Jun-14 21:31:32

So much depends on how close together the deeds were! If there was a week or more difference, the faintness of the test would suggest the later one, although sperm can survive for up to 5 days. Eggs can survive 24 hours, sometimes as much as 48 hours, so technically she could be 9 or even 10dpo.

Again with a dating scan at 6 weeks (most accurate until about 8-9 weeks +/- 5 days, then it becomes a much greater variance) - if there was over a week between sessions then it would be slightly more certain from that too. Although again there's the whole sperm living up to 5-7 days and the scans being out by a week. And if the pregnancy is not viable it might measure any amount of time behind as well.

So.. it's complicated grin but you can take an educated guess and say "balance of probability" from the darkness of the test and a dating scan. However it probably can't ever be 100% unless there's over 12 days between shags and the pregnancy is viable.

As has been mentioned, you can get a CVS to determine paternity but it's not without risk to the baby if you intend to keep it.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now