to be unimpressed by the school photographer insisting that the girls let their hair loose for photos?

(81 Posts)
qwertypop Sat 07-Jun-14 15:45:37

DD is in Y6 and has long hair that she wears in plaits for school. This is a) a school rule and b) something I'd insist on even if it wasn't due to nits and tangles etc.

School photos yesterday and DD came home with her hair loose. The photographer had told all the girls to let their hair loose so they'd look pretty for the photos hmm I totally believe DD on this as she hates having her hair in her face, hates wearing it loose, and was furious at having been told to do it!

Is this normal or AIBU to think it a bit crap and sexist of them? Surely they should know that children look pretty however their hair is?

qwertypop Fri 13-Jun-14 12:49:28

Didn't get to see the teacher involved because she only works Fridays to cover PPA time. However I mentioned it to DDs normal class teacher who gave me the total brush off and said she knew what girls were like and it was probably their idea! So not holding out much hope that my point will be taken seriously... Will try this afternoon to catch the cover teacher though.

NatashaRomanov Mon 09-Jun-14 17:23:21

Wow, I'd be pretty unimpressed if this happens to my DD (she starts school in September).
School photos should represent how the child looks at school. Not how some photographer thinks is 'pretty'!
FWIW, I think my DD looks very pretty in plaits, which is how she'll wear her hair for school. Left loose, it goes wild within 30 seconds. She still looks pretty, just not neat!

PeterParkerSays Mon 09-Jun-14 17:11:51

Hope you're giving them hell OP, and asking why the teacher backed the photographer up in this escapade.

BillnTedsMostFeministAdventure Mon 09-Jun-14 16:56:29

If photographer wanted them all to look similar then why did photographer say "to look pretty"?

SantasLittleMonkeyButler Mon 09-Jun-14 15:40:48

Oh yes, because the most important thing a little girl will ever do is "look pretty".

How about keeping the plaits in because they look 'smart'? Or do we not require our little girls to be smart.

Grr. YANBU.

Nocomet Mon 09-Jun-14 15:39:34

YANBU, by Y6 the girls in DD2's class would have had very firm ideas about how they wanted their hair (very likely not how their Mothers did it that morning)

They would not appreciate the photographer having an opinion.

DD2 wears glasses and keeps them on for photos (she squints if she doesn't), she is faintly self conscious about them so any hint she looks prettier with out would make me complain.

Notso Mon 09-Jun-14 15:26:08

I was really sad when I saw DS1's first school photo because his 'helpful' teacher had brushed his gorgeous longish, shaggy hair into a severe side parting. He looked wrong, like Bart Simpson at church.

I don't think it is a sinister thing. Maybe he just wanted them all to look similar.

Sounds a bit "jimmy saville" to me wanting the young girls to look pretty for the camera. Did he bring sweets or just puppies too?

I think it's grimy. I'd be def complaining too.

qwertypop Mon 09-Jun-14 14:47:08

About to go to fetch DD so watch this space for an update! Will be kicking off the conversation by asking whose idea the loose hair was and take it from there...

cosmicstardust Mon 09-Jun-14 00:39:39

DD's hair is in cornrows at the moment, which she would struggle to take out by herself. Would the photographer have made girls with similar braids in take them out too? confused

SteamTrainsRealAleandOpenFires Sun 08-Jun-14 23:55:49

I've never had a school photo taken of me, (as I hate being photographed) I hid in the bogs every time. grin

Oldraver Sun 08-Jun-14 22:30:37

Phantom...there are two on my profiles circa 1972/3... one walking and anotehr posing in front of a bookcase

phantomnamechanger Sun 08-Jun-14 18:27:24

<mini hijack - does anyone else have some really foul school photos from the 70s where you were posed with fur rugs and fake plants and other crap on a table in front of you? and ridiculous fake oil painting type backdrops of country scenes instead of a plain background. they are hideous! grin >

phantomnamechanger Sun 08-Jun-14 18:24:42

can you imagine a wedding photographer "suggesting" the bride, or anyone in the wedding party changed the way they look for the photos?

I absolutely agree OP this is wrong - the message is that little girls should be bothered about how other people think they should look, that there is some sort of perceived norm they have to strive to fit, to be acceptable/good enough

I have some absolutely gorgeous pictures of my DD2, a right impish little pickle, with her plaits and freckles. Hair down would not have been her (and it would have looked a mess!)

MiaowTheCat Sun 08-Jun-14 18:23:51

The only intervention I've ever staged on school photograph day is trying to make them look like they haven't been dragged through a hedge backwards - which may involve redoing ponytails, or finding a jumper from lost property to borrow that doesn't have the world atlas of yoghurt from lunch down the front or whatever. Other than that I tend to assume the parents have sent them into school how they want them to be photographed.

I can't replicate situations where parents have sent little girls in with beautiful french plaits that they've taken out themselves at playtime though unfortunately - sorry but I'm still shite at little girls' hair (as the state of DD1 will usually testify).

ExcuseTypos Sun 08-Jun-14 17:28:04

I'd be fuming.

I'd phone the school on Monday asking why the photographer wasnt challenged on his request. he sounds like an old pervert to me

quietbatperson Sun 08-Jun-14 17:22:50

I was asked to take my glasses off for school photos in primary school. My mother was furious. None of the boys were asked to take their glasses off.

ThaneOfScunthorpe Sun 08-Jun-14 16:54:32

Sexist and creepy. I agree with whoever it was that said it's like a trip back to the 70s.

FiveExclamations Sun 08-Jun-14 16:47:25

Same thing happened with my DD's end of primary school whole class pic. DD couldn't get the two invisible bands that were holding back the front of her hair out, but she let the back down. The two small pony tails at the front didn't sit right once the back was loose and she looked like she had horns.

She's only looked presentable in one school photo and that was her reception one, so I should be used to it by now.

JonesRipley Sun 08-Jun-14 16:32:34

OP
yanbu. This is sexist.

JonesRipley Sun 08-Jun-14 16:32:00

Toys

i have commented onthis before. When I was achild here in the 70s there were always several girls in each class with short hair.

But I am starting to see some signs in the Primary school where I work that things are changing a bit. A few of the year 4 s and up have had their hair cut short in the lAst couple of years.

BillnTedsMostFeministAdventure Sun 08-Jun-14 16:12:05

Yy Nanny.

Nanny0gg Sun 08-Jun-14 16:07:17

I also bet that a number of mothers had spent ages that morning making sure that the girls' hair was done perfectly.

They'll be really pissed off!

PandaNot Sun 08-Jun-14 06:31:31

I can't believe anyone will buy the photo! They'll all look like they've been dragged through a hedge.

My dd has long hair because she needs to wear it in a bun for dancing. I'd much prefer her to have short hair.

madwomanbackintheattic Sun 08-Jun-14 05:17:21

Another one whose dd was told to take her glasses off for the photos. She has worn them full time for 8 years. The photo didn't even look like her. We never see her without glasses.

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