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AIBU?

to be unimpressed by the school photographer insisting that the girls let their hair loose for photos?

80 replies

qwertypop · 07/06/2014 15:45

DD is in Y6 and has long hair that she wears in plaits for school. This is a) a school rule and b) something I'd insist on even if it wasn't due to nits and tangles etc.

School photos yesterday and DD came home with her hair loose. The photographer had told all the girls to let their hair loose so they'd look pretty for the photos Hmm I totally believe DD on this as she hates having her hair in her face, hates wearing it loose, and was furious at having been told to do it!

Is this normal or AIBU to think it a bit crap and sexist of them? Surely they should know that children look pretty however their hair is?

OP posts:
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EmmanuelWoganberry · 07/06/2014 15:48

It doesn't even make any sense as even if the parent wanted a 'pretty' picture surely how they send them is how they like their hair.

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olivespickledonions · 07/06/2014 15:51

YANBU. It's a school photo and if their hair is in plaits etc for school then that's how their hair should be in the photo.
It does seem sexist in an odious 1970's way.

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WorraLiberty · 07/06/2014 15:52

It's not just sexist, it's bloody stupid.

Surely most of those girls will have looked as though they've stuck their finger in a light socket, or a bit of a frizzy mess if they've removed their plaits?

I can't see many photos being sold.

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LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 07/06/2014 15:52

My DD looks far better when her hair is neatly styled in a plait than when it is down. I would not be impressed if they undid her plaits for a photo, as she would look like she was pulled through a hedge backwards!
All school photos at DDs school are just as they were sent to school, so have not come across this yet.

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LoveSardines · 07/06/2014 15:53

So he told any girls with short hair that they are "not pretty", effectively.

Plus what everyone else said.

YANBU.

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SpicyPear · 07/06/2014 15:54

Outrageous. What were the boys asked to do to look pretty? Just yuck.

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whereisshe · 07/06/2014 15:54

I'd honestly be having a word to the school. Telling them they have to look "pretty" in school photos is exactly the kind of tripe that gets dished out to girls and not to boys, reinforcing the idea that their value as people comes from their looks.

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LoveSardines · 07/06/2014 15:54

What about any girls afro type hair styled in a careful and more longterm way?

Were they to take their hair out too?

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LoveSardines · 07/06/2014 15:55

Do any of the boys have long hair tied back, were they given the same instruction?

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phantomnamechanger · 07/06/2014 15:55

it was funny the year DDs class photos were taken after they had just got back from swimming Grin

YANBU OP, and I would complain - it is not up to the photographer to decide what is an appropriate hair do for a photo

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Stinkle · 07/06/2014 15:59

YANBU

Surely most of those girls will have looked as though they've stuck their finger in a light socket, or a bit of a frizzy mess if they've removed their plaits?

Exactly!

In my daughter's last year at primary the photographer did this.

Our school rules also state that all long hair should be tied back so DD's photo was awful, madly sticking out bumpy hair. She didn't even have a hairbrush with her.

School ended up having half the year 6 photos re-done as they were also for their year books

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thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter · 07/06/2014 16:33

Bloody hell, what next? Make up artist? Wind machine? It's a school photo not an ELLE photoshoot! Hmm

I'd complain to the head to get a different professional photographer to come to school to re-do the photos.

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SpottieDottie · 07/06/2014 16:36

YANBU. I used to hate having my hair loose when it was long so I'd always have plaits in school photos.

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pumpkinsweetie · 07/06/2014 16:38

I wouldn't be happy with this either, not only is untied hair at nit magnet but it's effectively saying short hair is ugly.

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oohdaddypig · 07/06/2014 16:41

Yuck. Yuck. YANBU

Why must a girl be told to look "pretty". This in itself sounds horribly sexist.

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Sirzy · 07/06/2014 16:44

ridiculous.

There again a photographer at school once told me to take my glasses off for the photo as I would look better without them. As someone who has worn glasses most of her life why on earth would I want to take them off for a photo?

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Nanny0gg · 07/06/2014 16:47

Normally there would be a member of staff there (for crowd control). Why didn't they speak up? I certainly would have!

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Ohwhatfuckeryisthis · 07/06/2014 16:48

Fucking hate school photos. Fecking tempest, with their outrageously expensive and not that good photos. However this is beyond the pale, complaints and a boycott.

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qwertypop · 07/06/2014 16:50

Apparently the (female) teacher in charge agreed and said the photo would be better if they all had their hair the same! I mean FFS I don't even want a group photo, who does?

OP posts:
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FatalCabbage · 07/06/2014 17:05

Everyday sexism Sad

I wouldn't have looked like me with my hair down. Surely parents want a photo of how their children actually normally look minus yogurt drips.

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sunshinecity17 · 07/06/2014 17:09

shallow -maybe, sexist I don't see how.I mean didn't the boys have their hair loose or did they have it tied up in plaits?

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sunshinecity17 · 07/06/2014 17:12

and I actually agree with the photographer.I think loose hair makes for a more relaxed natural looking photo.i suspect this is what the photographer meant and something got lost in translation.

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BillnTedsMostFeministAdventure · 07/06/2014 17:12

"shallow -maybe, sexist I don't see how.I mean didn't the boys have their hair loose or did they have it tied up in plaits?"

Because they were told to do something outside of their day to day norms to "look pretty"

HTH.

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BillnTedsMostFeministAdventure · 07/06/2014 17:14

If the boys were all told to gel their hair into a point to look handsome, then there might be some parity.

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PlumpPartridge · 07/06/2014 17:22

The photo would be better if they all looked the same? SIlly.

They will look more relaxed if they adopt a look which, in the case of the op's daughter, they hate? SIlly.

"Girls, I'd prefer for you to wear your hair loose for this photo. That will make you look more pretty than you do right now. The logical implication of my statement is that your current state of prettiness is insufficient. The boys? What about the boys? They look just fine as they are. You, on the other hand, all need to make an effort because you are female. Now smile and remember - tits and teeth, darlings."

I think you can see where reported fact became fiction, but it wasn't exactly a stretch, was it?

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