Note: Please bear in mind that whilst this topic does canvass opinions, it is not a fight club. You may disagree with other posters but we do ask you please to stick to our Talk Guidelines and to be civil. We don't allow personal attacks or troll-hunting. Do please report any. Thanks, MNHQ.

Sister in law going on honeymoon for 2 weeks without kids

(82 Posts)
Myrtle2012 Mon 26-May-14 14:24:37

My SiL is getting married at the end of August and going off on honeymoon for 2 weeks. It is her 2nd marriage and her child (8) is staying with her grandparents. SiL has told me that they will find this a struggle but will have a get on with it as they offered. Her partner also has a child (11) with some behavioural and learning issues. His mother currently has limited and controlled access and so he will be staying with her and an Aunt and separately another Uncle. The 11 year old has never spent more than a week apart from his Dad.
I think this is all a bit selfish especially as SiL has not been on holiday with her child, or with new family, for 3 years due to lack of effort rather than money.
To add to the mix the wedding list is only for contributions to the honeymoon.
I've tried to raise my concerns with SiL and other family members but have been fobbed off with "we deserve it"or "she's decided so that's it" or my favourite "what do you know you are not a mother".
So I turn to you......am I being unreasonable......

HelenHen Mon 26-May-14 14:27:20

Yup... Yabu... Tis none of your business... Reverse?

And why not hold Dad equally responsible?

MisForMumNotMaid Mon 26-May-14 14:27:33

Yes. Its two weeks, they've sorted childcare, its a one off.

Get over it. Its not effecting you is it? Isn't this just judging because you can?

YABU.

Daisymasie Mon 26-May-14 14:28:44

I don't really see the problem. It's their honeymoon so presumably a one off holiday without the kids thing. They've sorted out childcare arrangements with other family members that they obviously trust.

thebodylovesspring Mon 26-May-14 14:29:19

I think it's none of your business and certainly not for you to comment on.

However I would never consider going on holiday without my kids as dh and I wouldn't enjoy that but still that's our business and noone else's too.

Keep out of it op. grin

murphys Mon 26-May-14 14:29:27

What concerns? Her honeymoon, their kids. Yes, sorry YABU.

ICanSeeTheSun Mon 26-May-14 14:29:46

Yabu.

I love my DC, only this year DH and I went away for the first time since the DC was born so 9 years.

Really enjoyed it plan to do it every year.

I went off to boarding school at ten <twitches>. It's one fortnight. And yes, they do deserve a honeymoon. The children may well miss them but they'll be with other people who love them. Butt out, sorry. Your slagging them off will be remembered long after the children have put their two week holiday with granny / auntie is forgotten.

What would the headline read?

"8 year old stays with grandparents for a week"

confused

Get a grip?

catgirl1976 Mon 26-May-14 14:30:55

YABU

It's their honeymoon. They have sorted childcare. They are happy with the arrangements.

CoffeeTea103 Mon 26-May-14 14:31:58

Mind your own business!

magpiegin Mon 26-May-14 14:31:58

What are your actual concerns? It's their life, they have sorted childcare and why shouldn't they have a honeymoon? YABU.

javotte Mon 26-May-14 14:32:31

YABU. The child is eight.
I know a couple who went away for a fortnight when their baby was two weeks old.

PortofinoRevisited Mon 26-May-14 14:32:40

None of your beeswax.

Nomama Mon 26-May-14 14:32:42

VU

Why would you even think you had a relevant pov on this?

Andcake Mon 26-May-14 14:33:41

Yabu - I perhaps would think a week more reasonable but the children are not babies and have people to look after them. With regards 'you're not a mum comment' annoying yes but I'm afraid they are right. You love them to bits but its hard work and some time alone sounds bliss.

TheScience Mon 26-May-14 14:35:32

I thought this was going to be bitching about a heartless woman leaving her babies, but really - 8 and 11 year olds? Some kids are at boarding school at that age grin

Flexibilityiskey Mon 26-May-14 14:36:23

What everyone else said. It sounds absolutely fine to me. I can't see an issue with an 8 year old and an 11 year old being cared for by other family members for a couple of weeks. Why are you so concerned by it?

TaliZorahVasNormandy Mon 26-May-14 14:36:47

I fail to see the issue.

As I type, my 7 year old DD is having fun with my exes parents.

Time away is a benefit to the children as it is to the parents.

Kaekae Mon 26-May-14 14:36:49

I don't think it is any of your business really. I am getting married abroad with combined honeymoon but taking our children with us but I wouldn't think anything of it if other people opted not to take their children. I know my children would probably love the idea of staying with grandparents for two weeks!

StillaChocoholic Mon 26-May-14 14:37:04

Ahh I'm jealous. We didn't get a honeymoon. I'd love a little break with just me and husband. I hope they enjoy themselves.

Pobblewhohasnotoes Mon 26-May-14 14:38:53

And? The children are 8 and 11! What's the problem?

TereseaGreen Mon 26-May-14 14:40:10

You would hate me. My DS goes abroad with my parents for a month in the summer. Every summer since he was 2. Judge away.

Why do you think it is your place to comment on the actions of your husband's sister? Are you trying to start a family rift?

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now