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AIBU?

to think if your staying with a vegan you wouldn't bring meat into the house

165 replies

brt100 · 26/05/2014 10:05

Hi,

Have a few people staying with me, one of them bought back some greasy fried chicken the other night. I thought oh well thats a bit impolite and rude especially as she wanted to eat it inside with my plates are cutlery. But I let it slip and washed up said dishes and had to dispose of the remains myself as she just left them in the lounge smelling.

Now this morning she's bought some sausages to cook on my pan. I put my foot down to this as she's super messy and would get animal fat all over the place.

Apparently its my fault as I'm a vegan it makes her crave meat.

Just to add I'm not a pushy vegan, I say nothing about it and she's the one that keeps asking stupid things like "don't you miss x and y, I couldn't do it"

Also I live in a town centre with 20+ places to eat within a 10 min walk

OP posts:
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arethereanyleftatall · 26/05/2014 10:09

How long are they staying for? Are they friends or paying guests?

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brt100 · 26/05/2014 10:10

2 nights, ha they are friends

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BerniesBurneze · 26/05/2014 10:10

She wouldn't be staying in my house again! I'm not vegan and I love sausages but she is being so rudr by not even asking.

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BuzzardBird · 26/05/2014 10:11

I think that is incredibly rude of your guests. I would not ask them again. They know your feelings and should respect them in your own home...mess aside, which is also rude.

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Youdontneedacriminallawyer · 26/05/2014 10:13

YABU if you insist on eating vegan in her house, she can insist on eating meat in your house. It's not doing you any harm, and surely you can wash cooking and eating utensils.

I get cross when people who have strong principles over eating, or anything else, expect other people to cater for them.

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arethereanyleftatall · 26/05/2014 10:16

Yanbu, you'd think she could manage for two days. Respect someone elses house.

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brt100 · 26/05/2014 10:17

YABU if you insist on eating vegan in her house

Of course I don't buy meat when staying with her!

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Forgettable · 26/05/2014 10:17

How rude

Please don't invite her again and in fact why not let the friendship go. Send her a link to earthlings as well.

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Birdsgottafly · 26/05/2014 10:18

She should of asked.

I'm Vegan, but cook meat for my DD's and my Pets, but I done cook meat on the bone, would not deal with left over chicken with bones sticking out etc.

It's similar to not being a smoker and have someone smoke in your kitchen, for anyone that wonders what the big deal is.

Or being forced to watch a film such as Hostel whilst you eat your food (if you aren't into Horror).

OP, tell her straight about her asking you stupid questions.

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Igggi · 26/05/2014 10:19

Yanbu. Of course leaving traces of fatty meat juices in the kitchen of a vegan is unacceptable.

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Birdsgottafly · 26/05/2014 10:20

"YABU if you insist on eating vegan in her house"

No, it isn't comparable.

Eating "Vegan", can just mean having porridge for breakfast and food that the other person would normally eat.

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Forgettable · 26/05/2014 10:25

Yes Birds, imagine the fuss needed to eat plant-based foodstuff

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NotALondoner · 26/05/2014 10:28

She would be my ex friend by now. That's gross.

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brt100 · 26/05/2014 10:29

Thanks bird, going to have a calm chat to her before she goes.

OP posts:
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Gileswithachainsaw · 26/05/2014 10:29

She is being rude!!!

Ffs can people not cope two days???

At very least she should have asked and perhaps got stuff that doesn't require a ton of grease and mess. Is find making a ham sandwich or buying a meat micro meal ok. But getting animal fat over your kitchen and not clearing up after herself is disgusting.

I used to cook meat for people and could cope doing so however I know not everyone is like that.

Still don't see the big deal in two days of vegan food. Talk about dramatic.

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BrianTheMole · 26/05/2014 10:29

YABU if you insist on eating vegan in her house, she can insist on eating meat in your house. It's not doing you any harm, and surely you can wash cooking and eating utensils.

Don't be stupid. The op has every right not to have fat from dead animals in her pans. The friend is very rude.

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gorionine · 26/05/2014 10:31

Youdontneedacriminallawyer not the same at all, unless OP's friend exclusively feed on meat. I have so far never met anyone who does.

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pregnantpause · 26/05/2014 10:31

Yanbu .
I would have thought the chicken may have been okay- presumably it was some form of fast food she bought and was eating to avoid you having to cook for her and any embarrassment if she didn't like what had been offered- BUT not tidying up after herself or asking permission is awful. And the sausages are appalling- just no respect at all. No need for it.

Then again, I'd say it was fine if she brought cheese , milk , or butter into your house for toast and coffee which I suppose as a vegan is just as bad- really I'm somewhat on the fenceConfused

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LittleBearPad · 26/05/2014 10:32

Send her out to get a sausage sarnie elsewhere. Not exactly hard to get hold of. She's being a brat

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Ludways · 26/05/2014 10:33

I'm a meat eater but I find that totally unacceptable.

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BananaBumps · 26/05/2014 10:33

I have had people order meat in takeaways at my house, which I really didn't like but didn't say anything, but would not let anyone start cooking sausages. I'd just explain that I know it might sound odd to them but I'm a bit precious about not having meat in my kitchen. Most people have their own apparently minor things which are important to them and can respect this.

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OnlyLovers · 26/05/2014 10:35

I'm a meat eater too and she's rude and insensitive and not behaving much like a friend.

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MysweetAudrina · 26/05/2014 10:35

I would always try and facilitate my guests when they are staying. I dont drink tea or coffee or alcohol and I dont smoke but I would always buy in tea and coffee as I know others like it. Likewise my ds is vegetarian so I always provide him with a tasty vegetarian option when he is eating with us. I would take into consideration guests religious and lifestyle choices and cater for them accordingly. Most guests would insist on smoking outside but if it was mil or someone I would allow them to smoke in the kitchen. I dont see the issue with someone using a plate to eat meat off. Do you never eat in restaurants? Surely she should clean up after herself regardless of what she is eating, I would have more of an issue with that than with what she is eating. I would not expect guests to only eat what I eat and if I had an issue with preparing a certain food they liked I would not object to them bringing it or buying it.

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SaucyJack · 26/05/2014 10:36

Wouldn't bother me. I'm vegetarian and live with three meat-eaters.

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Fairylea · 26/05/2014 10:36

Totally unacceptable. You wouldn't drink or bring alcohol into a Muslim household. To me (as an ex vegan - was vegan for 26 years) this is the same thing.

I couldn't be friends with someone with such blatant disregard for my beliefs.

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