To join fat club or put gastric surgery on the credit card?

(79 Posts)
AtYourCervix Tue 13-May-14 17:25:22

I am fat. Very fat. Much fatter than anyone should be.

I've tried everything and failed miserably. I am a miserable fat failure.

So. The option.

1. Fat club.

2. Surgery.

I did sw fat club about a hundred years ago and lost a few stone but over the last 9 years it's steadily piled back on plus more.

I have an hour to convince myself.

AtYourCervix Tue 13-May-14 17:47:48

I can't do low/no carb.

Aaaargh. I am weak. Why am I just not capable of simply not eating like a pig? It is utterly pathetic. I sm seriously considrring paying somrone to weigh me. Insanr.

Trollsworth Tue 13-May-14 17:48:07

Count calories, cervix. Then you can eat what you want as long as yu can 'afford' it. Myfitnesspal.com are good.

Trollsworth Tue 13-May-14 17:49:04

Weight watchers. When you are paying someone to weigh you, you aren't paying for five seconds on their scales, you are paying for their approval.

dottyaboutstripes Tue 13-May-14 17:51:45

I'm another no to surgery. I was a size 20 and I decided on WW. It was hard, REALLY hard and it took a LONG time to lose the weight. By joining a group like WW or SW you do get the support if you stay for the meetings, you have to look at it in terms of being in it for the long haul though, there just isn't a quick fix nor instant results, just a long hard slog with slip ups along the way. You can do it though!!

LadySybilLikesCake Tue 13-May-14 17:52:10

Be strong. Go through your cupboard and fridge, then throw out the cheese/biscuits/crisps. Do an online food order and replace them with seeds, nuts, fruit, veg, fish. Only you can change things and surgery isn't going to help if you don't want it. I know no cakes or cheese is boring, but the more you tell yourself you don't need it the easier it becomes.

AtYourCervix Tue 13-May-14 17:53:21

I am aldo far far to lazy to start counting, weighing and measuring.

And i work stupid shifts.

LadySybilLikesCake Tue 13-May-14 17:55:19

Are you bollocks, you're never too old and you can sort the other one out. Shift work isn't an excuse either (I work shifts. Sort the healthy snacks out when you're at home and take them to work with you).

Have therapy to get to the root cause of why you are "greedy" and feel such a "failure". IMO there's no point in trying to lose weight until you've looked into your relationship with food because it'll always be there ready to sabotage your weight loss efforts. No to surgery until you've exhausted all other options.

At the same time go to your GP (why don't you want to go BTW?) and get a check up. If there's a physical reason for your weight gain (apart from the toast and cheese and your bad back) then that can be dealt with. You'll also find out if it's safe to do some exercise.

pinkstinks Tue 13-May-14 17:57:58

Come to fat club. I an a size 20 but lost 7.5lbs in 2 weeks so far. You don't start with points etc just filling and healthy things. I am slowly retraining myself! Plus I though it would be more scary than it actually was!

HappyHippyChick Tue 13-May-14 17:59:03

Have you considered hypnosis? There Is an app Virtual Gastric Band which I have Downloaded and used for a little while. It was relatively successful in helping me change my eating habits and considering mindfully what I ate, however sadly I fell pregnant before I could do the virtual surgery so can't tell you too much about it.

Chippednailvarnish Tue 13-May-14 17:59:49

But your still not addressing what the issue is. If being fat upsets you so much why do you sabotage yourself by eating chesse, wine, etc.

It sounds less of an over eating problem and more like a lack of self esteem.

MaryWestmacott Tue 13-May-14 18:01:43

OP - you do understand once you have the band you will have to use will power to stop yourself from eating cheese and wine anyway? Lots of people really struggle with it because they think the band will magically take away their desire for foods they shouldn't have, all it does is make you very ill if you eat them, you'll still want to eat them. That has to change first, or the band will just make your life shit. Sorry.

With the band you will have to count, weigh and measure your food.

So if you didn't find SW helped you change the way you think about food, then perhaps you need to get some therapy, and see if you can change the way you think about foods.

Ultimately, bands only work by forcing you to eat the way you should, it does not change the way you think, it won't change the fact that you have shifts, it won't change the fact you want to consume more calories than your body needs.

By having the band fitted, you are taking the decision to stop eating cheese, crisps and crap foods. You could take the same decision without putting yourself through a dangerous and expensive proceedure. If you haven't taken that decision, the band won't work/you'll be very ill.

TinklyLittleLaugh Tue 13-May-14 18:03:14

Come on, size 20 really isn't massive. A big recommendation for My Fitness Pal here; if you're someone who loves good food then eating some freaky diet is not going to work for you. The weighing and measuring thing you you only have to do the first time you have something, and then save it to the memory, it's pretty straightforward.

JingletsJangletsYellowBanglets Tue 13-May-14 18:06:02

Er, if you "can't " do low carb, how do you know you can "do" small portions? The operation is just the first bit. It's completely changing your eating habits that's the hard bit.

TinklyLittleLaugh Tue 13-May-14 18:06:06

And I always saved a few calories for a tiny glass of wine and a few cubes of cheese.

AtYourCervix Tue 13-May-14 18:08:22

My relationship with weight, food and myself is pretty fucked. Nothing physically wrong with me.
Tried MFP. It's too easy to lie to it.

Lizzylou Tue 13-May-14 18:08:35

You need to go with what is going to work for you, with the best will in the world if what you love is cake and wine, low carb will be a stretch for you. Far better to learn to enjoy your favourite things in moderation.
The thing is, no one plan works for everyone, someone will rock up soon and suggest 5:2, then lighterlife, then WW. Only you know what will work, it may be that you try a number of options before finding what fits into your lifestyle.
The most important thing though is that you know that you are worth the effort of changing your eating habits. Stop talking yourself down and see yourself as someone worth the effort.

skittycat Tue 13-May-14 18:09:16

Go to 'fat club'.

And stop coming up with excuses as to why you can't lose weight.

If you are start of with the view that you can't do it, then you probably wont.

A gastric band will not be the magic solution you want and won't address why you eat what you do. With fat club you will be introduced to a new way of thinking about food and will get some moral support.

And I say this as a someone else who is overweight. It's been my excuses that held me back from losing weight, but now i've stopped with the excuses and changed my way of thinking about it I have started to lose a bit of weight.

(and my apologies if this sounds harsh at all!)

lowcarbforthewin Tue 13-May-14 18:10:20

Unfortunately you can have the band and still regain weight. It is a tool. It isn't a quick fix. I watch videos on YouTube of people who have had it done, most have lost many stones and then regained many stones. You find ways round it if you are that kind of eater, the pouch can stretch. Plus you can die and suffer malnutrition. It really isn't a good idea. And no doctor would do one unless you can demonstrate you can lose a stone, and well, of you can lose a stone you don't need the surgery.

Have you tried Overeaters anonymous? That and counselling is where I'd start. I used to be a size 24, I was hungry all the time and I comfort ate. Low carbing really has helped because it keeps me full and the food is so nice it's perfect for someone greedy like me. I'm size 14 now. But I don't think you're ready to jump into any diet, you need to tackle the root problems first. In fact no diet might just push you into binging and making you feel more rubbish.

Maryz Tue 13-May-14 18:11:05

Ok, it sounds as though you need to be shamed into it.

Get one of these boot-camp-y people (not low carb bc but one of the companies that sends round beautiful young fit people to your house).

You need one where you will be too embarrassed to lie to them, where they will come over once a week and weigh you and do a food plan which is simple enough for you to follow.

You need to spend a stupid amount of money.

At the end, you will be so pissed off at yourself, and embarrassed, and broke that you will vow to never, ever, ever get yourself in that position again.

At least that method worked for a friend of mine. He lost stones.

AtYourCervix Tue 13-May-14 18:11:22

Right.

I'm going to fat club.

I've written it down so now it has to happen.

supafish Tue 13-May-14 18:12:23

Please don't do surgery , nearly killed me and now I'm back to doin it the hard way !!!

LadySybilLikesCake Tue 13-May-14 18:13:03

Good luck! smile

Cushioney Tue 13-May-14 18:13:34

Best of luck AtYour

Keep us updated thanks

fatlazymummy Tue 13-May-14 18:15:35

OP, I was a size 20-22 3 years ago. Now I have lost 4 stones and wear size 12-14.You can lose this weight without surgery, in a healthy way, and feel so much better physically and mentally (most importantly). There are a lot of different ways, people have made some great suggestions, and if none of these suit you then there are other resources and people to help you out there.
I honestly believe that eating a healthy diet, portion control and exercise is the best thing for your body and I would recommend that over weight loss surgery (and think what you could do with that amount of money - a nice holiday perhaps?)

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