to ask schoolkids on the bus I was on to watch their language?

(142 Posts)
StudyFullTime Tue 29-Apr-14 22:29:12

travelling on a bus at school kicking out time and school kids got on and sat by me and 4 year old ds, they start effing and jeffing, they couldn't be older than 13/14.

Anyway I let that go until one of them calls the other a fucking cunt so I turn to them ask could they watch their language please.

They do watch their language but are still mumbling.

Then I thought balls, should I have said that? So, wibu?

Forlornhope Tue 29-Apr-14 22:32:06

What do you think?

Vintagejazz Tue 29-Apr-14 22:32:19

No YANBU. If more people did it, it might dawn on them that it's not acceptable to behave like that in public. Where I go swimming, the steam room is always full of grown men cursing and swearing regardless of who's there. They do it completely automatically and obviously have no idea that people around them might not like it. But if more people had objected when they were kids, they might have copped on.

BrianTheMole Tue 29-Apr-14 22:32:50

Yanbu

runningonwillpower Tue 29-Apr-14 22:33:12

You were right. Your little one shouldn't hear that. And they knew you were right because they toned it down.

Teenagers do swear - that's a fact. But the decent ones know time and place.

WorraLiberty Tue 29-Apr-14 22:33:31

Seriously?

What makes you think you were unreasonable in any way at all?

TeamEdward Tue 29-Apr-14 22:34:19

Of course you weren't being unreasonable.
I've done, I'd do it again, and actually I would call the school too.

Most school kids would tone it down if you asked. I've been on buses when my DC were littlies, and the kids have self-censored, telling each other off for swearing in front of small children.

Ruushii Tue 29-Apr-14 22:34:23

Yanbu to want to speak up but it's hit and miss in reality. In a similar scenario, I spoke up and then heard them planning to punch me in the face when they got off the bus. So of course, my stop came up all of a sudden. That has put me off for life unfortunately.

Forlornhope Tue 29-Apr-14 22:34:33

Sigh. Why does everything have tonbevrun past other people? You were there. You said it. What's the issue

If it pissed you off - tell em.

Nocomet Tue 29-Apr-14 22:36:21

I have two teen DDs YANBU.

I don't mind the odd fuck at home, but I'd be furious if the were using language like that in public.

StudyFullTime Tue 29-Apr-14 22:40:05

I think it's the fact they can be quite intimidating when there's a group of them, also was expecting an earful of abuse. The worse thing I think and know it shouldn't matter is the fact it was a girl who said cunt

BobPatandIgglePiggle Tue 29-Apr-14 22:40:32

Yanbu. Been on the metro twice today.

7.15 am - 2 lads play fighting next to me, not quite jostling me but getting right on my nerves and jostling the bloke next to them. Shot them the teacher stay and said 'stop that please'.

They stopped and the bloke leaned over to thank me.

Coming home I got a seat (amazed) in a block of 4. 2 boys sat facing each other in the window seats. One reading a newspaper - other kept flicking a lighter trying to set fire to the corner of the paper.

After 3 goes I snapped 'stop that please, it's dangerous'. He stopped too.

Pisses me right off when kids behave badly in public.

Vintagejazz Tue 29-Apr-14 22:42:07

Yes Forlornhope we're just chatting about it. Feel free not to join in.

Laymizzrarb Tue 29-Apr-14 22:48:05

The sad thing s, it is not just kids. Everytime I take the bus (at least twice a day) I hear bad language. From adults chatting to each other, to talking on mobiles. F-ing this, f-ing that pets etc...

AreWeThereYeti Tue 29-Apr-14 22:48:25

I have called teens and adults up on their swearing many times and never had a bad reaction. I do it in a casual friendly way rather than a cross headmistressy way.

Eg, hey guys, would you mind watching your language, I've got my kids with me, thanks

I wouldn't do it if I thought they looked like they might thump me confused

Framboisier Tue 29-Apr-14 22:50:27

Far better to say something rather than just sit there fuming/tutting.

I got onto a heaving bus on Sat - two 10 year olds sitting on seats when there were OAPs standing.
I said to them that I really thought they should get up and let the older people sit down.
They looked at me like they had never once even considered that this would be the normal thing to do. But they did get up - and I said thank you.

Sometimes I think kids do actually just need to be pulled up on something that probably would have been commonly understood when I was younger old gimmer

ColdTeaAgain Tue 29-Apr-14 22:56:35

Good for you OP! No doubt everyone else on the bus felt the same.

I completely get what you mean about groups of teenagers being intimidating though. Never know if they'll do as they're told or become abusive.

Lobbing Wed 30-Apr-14 00:15:27

I've never had a problem asking teenagers to mind their language when my children were younger, I was always polite and would point out that I had a young child with me. You can sometimes suss out which one to direct it to and they'll keep their mates in check a bit.

Forlornhope Wed 30-Apr-14 06:35:06

Oh I forgot ladies don't swear hmm

AwfulMaureen Wed 30-Apr-14 07:24:05

I did it last week. I had my DD with me and the bus was full of old people....the thing is that these teens were so obviously naice, middle class teens that I had no fear and knew they'd just forgotten themselves. SO I smiled at them...and said "Can you not swear please? My daughter's only 6 and it's not on. Thank you." and they all went blush grin blush

The worse thing I think and know it shouldn't matter is the fact it was a girl who said cunt

hmm

usualsuspectt Wed 30-Apr-14 07:46:47

I don't find groups of teenagers intimidating even WC teenagers.

SetPhasersTaeMalkie Wed 30-Apr-14 07:51:00

No it wasn't unreasonable at all OP. I wouldn't have wanted DS listening to that when he was 4 either.

gordyslovesheep Wed 30-Apr-14 08:07:14

yanbu to ask people to moderate their language if it offends you

I am not sure what the drama was though in asking - of why a girl saying 'cunt' is worse than a boy saying it?

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