to think this is a double standard?

(54 Posts)

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Wed 23-Apr-14 14:57:38

You don't need to lighten up, this is bullying.

Do you feel confident enough to speak to a supervisor?

Cocolepew Wed 23-Apr-14 14:59:11

I agree, it is bullying , you should speak to someone.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AlpacaYourThings Wed 23-Apr-14 15:00:19


Agree with SanDiego it's bullying. Please don't feel that you need to 'lighten up' They need to shut the fuck up

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Wed 23-Apr-14 15:08:46

No one in a senior position?

Start to look for other work, is that possible?

In the mean time , are you hard faced enough to answer them back and maintain a poker face?

Bullies are cowards, when they mock you again say in a very firm voice 'does it make you feel superior to mock me' or ' I find bullies are such arses, do you enjoy being such a twat', maintain a straight face.

It might not stop them but it might give you some power back.

Stay strong, you don't have to be there forever.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Wed 23-Apr-14 15:15:12

They are also sounding jealous, you've left university and are living on your own, is that right?

Remember you are a nicer, stronger person than these arses.

Keep a log of the verbal bullying and any other issues.

felinesad Wed 23-Apr-14 15:17:48

Oh grey I know how you feel. I had exactly the same thing where I used to work. Because I didn't speak with a Yorkshire accent (which is where I was originally from) they spread a rumour that I'd had elocution lessons because ' I was ashamed of where I'd come from and thought I was better than anyone else'. It was an allmale office.

It was horrible and nasty and yes it was bullying.

Wantsunshine Wed 23-Apr-14 15:24:10

They are bullying, really not nice. Just keep asking them how they managed to escape the workhouse and make comments about them being similar to people on the soaps depending on what area you are from. Or just say you prefer it to sounding common.

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fluffyraggies Wed 23-Apr-14 15:26:23

Where are you OP? Purely out of interest.

IME in some places any London accent that's not typical East London, ie: 'raand the haases and daaan the stairs' is often though of as 'posh'. God knows why.

My advice would be to tell them how much it's upsetting you. Very frankly. Make them feel shitty and they'll stop. Hopefully.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IceBeing Wed 23-Apr-14 15:31:49

How about keeping an actual notebook in which you write down these incidents of bullying? Whenever it happens, pop out the note book and write down what was said (do this instead of replying). If/when someone asks what you are doing say you are building your constructive dismissal case and they are being very helpful and to keep it up.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I would ask them, "Do you mean to sound so bigoted? Are you happy to be bullies?" And give them a hard stare.

SlimJiminy Wed 23-Apr-14 15:34:17

I had this at a former workplace with people who hadn't been to uni. One bloke in particular had a massive chip on his shoulder about me and other graduates. I am NOT posh. I'm a northern lass, but my accent isn't as strong as his. I just used a few big words to make him feel silly and a few quick comebacks to his attention-seeking jibes. I made it clear that I wouldn't be putting up with it. Of course, it depends on your character and I do appreciate that not everyone feels able to/should have to deal with it in this way. FWIW, it says more about them than it does about you. Bullying is wrong whether in the playground or the workplace. If telling HR isn't an option, have a think about strategies for dealing with bullies that might work instead. Is there one colleague that you could get on-side? Someone who'll stick up for you? I know I would if you worked with me.

IceBeing Wed 23-Apr-14 15:34:20

and it has the advantage that you could really follow through on it if you want to. It might also carry more weight with the seniors....

Hoppinggreen Wed 23-Apr-14 15:35:37

as much as I want to tell you to fight back and tell them all the piss off if you do it could be seen as joining in with the " banter", which it sing it's bullying.
If I were in your position I would just ignore them, practise your icy " you are a piece of shit on my shoe" look and use it whenever they speak to you like this. I find that the phrase " if you say so" works quite well on arseholes like this.
If it makes you feel better you can even imagine yourself holding up a sign saying " fuck off" this is a visualisation technique someone taught me once.
The less this obviously bothers you the less fun it will be for them and hopefully they will stop.
You shouldn't have to it up with this crap but if there's no one you can speak to at work you might have to find a way of dealing with it or leave unfortunately.

UnicornSparkles Wed 23-Apr-14 15:39:21

Your company must have a grievance procedure - call the bullies out. It's not cool. You might be surprised that people in management will listen - I work in a start up and even though it's much less formal than a "proper" company these scenarios have to be accounted for and dealt with.

How long have you been there? Long enough to start looking for other jobs without it looking too bad on your CV?

fluffyraggies Wed 23-Apr-14 15:41:27

Blimey, yes, Bucks is hardly the bronx is it?! grin

I venture your accent is barely any 'posher' than their own and they are just using it as a stick to beat you with. How puerile. Don't worry about how you sound any more. It's not you - they're being twats. Don't rise to it.

How long have you worked there OP?

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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