Disclaimer: utterly unimportant, first world problem:
In my family presents have always been a treat, designed to be a surprise and make the recipient feel special. We've always been taught never to demand them, jealousy over presents/amount spent was never tolerated, and we never wrote Christmas lists or anything as saying what we wanted to be given always felt horribly grabby and entitled. Presents were always things of excitement and surprise.
DH and his family always tell each other what they want, consult on presents in advance and are very blunt with each other if they don't like something. I've just been informed that BIL is feeling a bit hard up at the mo and would like to know if it's ok if he gets me and DH one Easter Egg to share this year instead of one each.
Well, of COURSE it's ok. But now that he's asked it feels like he's taken any element of surprise or fun out of it and frankly I'd rather he didn't bother! If all I cared about was chocolate I could just go and buy myself a load. For me, what is special about presents is rarely the thing itself, but the effort or thought someone has taken to make me feel special. For me, the way DH and his family do presents just takes all the joy out of it (DH has form for this too). Do I have just hopelessly unrealistic expectations? Or (worse) am I just being grabby and entitled in a different way?
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AIBU?
To hate the way DH and his family do presents?
122 replies
HugoTheHippo · 16/04/2014 22:17
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usualsuspectt ·
16/04/2014 22:27
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16/04/2014 22:30
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16/04/2014 22:33
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usualsuspectt ·
16/04/2014 22:36
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