AIBU to be a bit annoyed MIL said 'hear you have got a little job'

(79 Posts)
MagnaCharge Sat 05-Apr-14 14:43:58

I have finally got a job as a TA in a school, the job I wanted trained for straight from school and did from the day I qualified until I had DC1 8 years ago.I was over the moon to have got back into what I have always considered my career ( I am not bright enough to be a teacher).
Then MIL pisses on my chips by saying 'I hear you have a little job'

I said 'yes but not really a little job, back to what I did before'

She said 'no, it's just a little mummy job not too taxing and doesn't matter if you have a few days off with the children'

AIBU to think What the fuck? I worked hard for my qualifications and happen to think supporting children with additional needs is really important. And she should know that seeing as BIL has autism and still lives at home in his 50s because he was not supported to succeed at school.

dayshiftdoris Sat 05-Apr-14 22:28:53

Pfft my son has additional need and any man or woman who takes him on certainly has not got 'a little job'

SEN TAs are the glue that hold schools, classes and kids together...

Little job my ARSE!

hoboken Sat 05-Apr-14 22:26:50

She is clearly a little woman who, despite her family's experience, is not capable of seeing that your work is vital. Ignore her, explanation is clearly futile <flounces out in solidarity with Magna>

HarrietSchulenberg Sat 05-Apr-14 22:22:46

Snort at the idea of it being easy to have time out of school to be with your own kids. I've missed carol concerts at which my children have performed, sports days and just about everything that my own kids do at their own schools because my secondary school won't allow me time off. If I have time off who will cover the kids I am paid to work with?

Tell your MIL I said she's an arse.

HarrietSchulenberg Sat 05-Apr-14 22:22:15

Snort at the idea of it being easy to have time out of school to be with your own kids. I've missed carol concerts at which my children have performed, sports days and just about everything that my own kids do at their own schools because my secondary school won't allow me time off. If I have time off who will cover the kids I am paid to work with?

Tell your MIL I said she's an arse.

Ermmm . . . and what high powered job does SHE hold??? CEO, high powered manager of blah blah??

I bet she doesn't even work outside the home !!
Congratulations by the way. Ignore MIL

NannyK7H Sat 05-Apr-14 21:40:19

Bloody hell, TA jobs are like gold dust! Well done xx

TheListingAttic Sat 05-Apr-14 21:05:15

Her first comment: bit tactless. Her second: bitch central!

Glad to hear you've got back into your career. It's so great to have a job you care about and find satisfying.

growingolddicustingly Sat 05-Apr-14 21:01:05

Let her come and tell my bearded and hairy-arsed stepson that being a TA is just a little mummy job, not too taxing Patronising woman.

Thattimeofyearagain Sat 05-Apr-14 20:43:30

Firstly, congratulations flowers
My fil told all dh side of the family that I had a little job cleaning an office
News to me, as I had done numerous collage courses whilst dc were little so I could get my current full time position within Training. To him women have 2 acceptable job roles, cleaner or hairdresser.

Applespearsorangesandlemons Sat 05-Apr-14 20:31:36

I get this from other mums. I work part time and am frequently asked whether I work in admin, nothing wrong with working in admin at all, I would be truly dreadful at it but it's the assumption that anything else isn't a job for mums but when I tell them my exact job they are often visibly shocked and comment that they didn't realise that I had a real job.

TeaOneSugar Sat 05-Apr-14 18:51:53

MIL uses that expression, apparently I'm a good little driver - no idea what that means driving is driving no.

I also earn a "mans wage" which is just as patronising, i remind her it's mine and I'm definitely a woman.

bellesbelle Sat 05-Apr-14 18:51:24

When I was a student nurse, I had a friend, also a student nurse. Her father used to call it her 'little hobby'. So patronising! She was working her arse of to get a degree and career with 3 children. She used to laugh it off, but gave me the rage.

littlemrschatterbox Sat 05-Apr-14 18:48:36

Congratulations!

There is absolutely no point in wasting your time and energy on discussing it with her.

I have similar conversations with my Mum. I love her but sometimes wonder if she is from another planet...

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere Sat 05-Apr-14 18:45:58

Congratulations, btw!

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere Sat 05-Apr-14 18:45:28

Your MIL is a patronising moron.

formerbabe Sat 05-Apr-14 18:43:13

When I finished university, an elderly relative asked me if I was going to get a job in an office or in a shop?! No other choices besides doing a bit of typing or serving in a shop!

Its just that generation's mindset!

RunnerBeen Sat 05-Apr-14 18:35:05

YANBU.

If it wasn't for the TA at my son's nursery i don't think he'd be ready to start school next year. TA is a very supportive and important role imo.

Ignore your twatty MIL and enjoy your new job.

congratulations thanks

BumPotato Sat 05-Apr-14 18:25:13

Congratulations on landing your job.

MIL's comments say more about her than you or your job, really. File it under ignore.

Well done again.

If there is a next time respond, with amusement if you can, 'ah nana, it's all very different now than it was back in your day.'

Somepercentagenotcool Sat 05-Apr-14 18:15:04

I am a teacher and once we had an extremely bright (to the extent he was really funny!) Year 6 boy show some prospective parents around. He took them into the TA room and some TAs were in there - he apparently said to the parents 'and these lovely ladies are here to make a bit of extra pocket money' shock grin

I used to be a TA for a while and ultimately it's what I want to do again - all the great parts of being in school with a lot less of the bullshit!

It's not a 'little job' though (well at least not for most TAs who are very dedicated).

thebody Sat 05-Apr-14 17:00:57

Congrats op.

I am TA and it's a fantastic job.

To be completely honest it's great to work around my teens and have school hols.

I used to run a very successful childminding business and paid all the bills and mortgage and it drive me ducking mental when a particular parents mil used to pick up her dgd and referred to me as 'the babysitter'

I used to be a district nurse and my dm called my job 'little' too. Very annoying and best ignored.

I also think that because she has had to raise a son with autism, this does not give her the right to belittle her daughter in laws achievements. Any more than me being in a wheelchair would entitle me to belittle someones is dancing aspirations (for example)

MagnaCharge Sat 05-Apr-14 16:53:22

thefallenmadonna
Yes I have posted about struggling to find a job. I am so pleased to have got one.

RoaringTiger. I think you totally missed the 'In her head bit' smile

squoosh Sat 05-Apr-14 16:40:24

'it's just a little mummy job not too taxing'

Stick the stupid cow under the patio.

Congrats on the job OP.

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