I know I am but teacher keeping class behind every night

(80 Posts)
moldingsunbeams Fri 04-Apr-14 19:15:37

I know I shall get flamed for this but.

DDs primary school class are kept back every single night from anywhere between usually 10 and 20 minutes after all the other classes have gone, usually its so long that none of other classes are even milling around the school, add to this the 5/10 minutes it takes them to queue in the tiny cloak room to get their stuff...

This is because she will not let them go until they are ALL quiet, the vast majority are quiet and its the same one or two each time. They do not keep the noisy ones back, they are trying to do the peer pressure method but it does not work.

I know I am bvu but
if my elderly parents pick dd up they then miss the hourly bus home and have to wait an hour. Neither are well.
I sometimes work evenings and if dd is late out by 20 minutes I miss the bus to work as I have to drop her off first.
We can only book dentist or doctor after school and they close at six and we have missed appointments twice because they have been kept behind so long.
The kids who catch the bus home also end up waiting an hour alone age 9 - 11 years.
Parents with other siblings end up waiting half an hour in the pouring rain waiting.

WIBVU to ask that dd comes out on time unless SHE is being punished for doing something wrong.

I know I know!

Nennypops Fri 04-Apr-14 19:20:35

I really don't think you are BU. But rather than ask for special favours for dd, I think it would be better to get together with some of the other parents to talk to the teacher about this and suggest she thinks of another way to discipline the class.

misskatamari Fri 04-Apr-14 19:21:29

Of course you're not being unreasonable. I'm a teacher too but think punishing a whole class every day sounds ridiculous. If it's taking the teacher 10-20 mins to get a class of pupils quiet enough to be dismissed there is a big problem. A one off - okay, but every day? I would be calling the school with my concerns as it's just not on. Is the teacher inexperienced? Surely someone on leadership must realise this is happening? There should be some support in place so that this is not a regular occurrence

withextradinosaurs Fri 04-Apr-14 19:21:47

It doesn't seem to be working as a discipline technique...and collective punishment is very unfair.

hackmum Fri 04-Apr-14 19:22:36

Of course yanbu. It's unfair and idiotic.

spanieleyes Fri 04-Apr-14 19:22:48

You are definitely NOT being unreasonable, the teacher is ( and I say this as a teacher with a "lively" class of my own!) The whole class "punishment" is a ridiculous idea and certainly at the end of the day the teacher is being completely unreasonable-parents have lives after school and holding onto children for 10-20 minutes is disgraceful!
( and I can't wait to see the back of my lot some days, they often get out early grin )

toobreathless Fri 04-Apr-14 19:23:08

YANBU.

That would drive me bonkers! A few minutes is acceptable occasionally, 10-20 minutes isn't and totally disrespects the fact that parents lead busy lives.

I would probably go in and get her out of the classroom myself if we had an appointment.

SetPhasersTaeMalkie Fri 04-Apr-14 19:24:28

Yanbu at all.

SuburbanRhonda Fri 04-Apr-14 19:24:44

Sorry, I'm a bit of an old hippy, but why do they have to be quiet in order to go home?

noblegiraffe Fri 04-Apr-14 19:25:51

Ask for a copy of the school behaviour policy. If impromptu after-school detentions of up to 20 minutes are not listed as a potential punishment, then contact the school and ask that they desist with immediate effect.

I'm surprised you've allowed it to go on this long, it's ridiculous that you have missed buses and appointments.

Dinosaursareextinct Fri 04-Apr-14 19:26:19

If our children are 10 mins late to school we get fined (counts as unauthorised absence), but of course it's fine for the school to be late!! I've come across this attitude at our school - there's no concept of parents having anything useful to do in life.

PansOnFire Fri 04-Apr-14 19:26:29

Actually, YANBU. Whole class punishments do not work. If the misbehaving children are kept with everyone else then where is the punishment? And if this is almost every night then where is the incentive not to misbehave for the ones who hadn't done anything in the first place. It breeds bad behaviour. This teacher needs a different method of disciplining the students who misbehave, the current one is ineffective and unfair.

I'd speak to the other mums first and then approach the teacher. It's ridiculous that you are being inconvenienced and even worse for your poor parents if your child is not the one misbehaving.

You could recommend she does something like letting each child go if they're sitting nicely and quietly. Then the kens that are messing get kept behind more than the behaving ones. Then the repeat offenders parents know that it's their child that is messing and can do something about it!

Kens?! Ones!!

I would be complaining to the teacher and the head

I would be furious at this and just go in everyday demanding she release my child

Melawen Fri 04-Apr-14 19:29:20

I'm not a teacher but I would suggest that if it's been going on for that long then she doesn't really have control AND it's clearly not working. The teacher needs to be made aware how much it's affecting other people and to find other ways of finding control.

Btw - YDNBU!

FloozeyLoozey Fri 04-Apr-14 19:30:12

I always thought schools had to have parents' permission to keep children later than school closing time?

Lagos Fri 04-Apr-14 19:30:12

Ridiculous! I am a teacher and would not dream of doing this. You let the good quiet ones go out first as it incentivises the others.

All this class will be learning is that it does not matter if they are one of the quiet ones or not, they all leave at the same time, so why not have a bit of a chat.

deakymom Fri 04-Apr-14 19:31:18

my daughters teacher used to tell the class to be quiet and send the quietest to the cloakroom first it seemed to work!

if you have an appointment go to the front desk a few minutes early and sign her out they really can't stop you and when the grandparents collect tell them to do the same the school will get fed up and tell her to discipline another way xx

fuckwitteryhasform Fri 04-Apr-14 19:32:17

Its not a punishment for the children though is it, they clearly (as its not working) are not bothered about an extra 10 minutes with their friends in class whereas it is a punishment for the parents. I would have been having words long before this, to the teacher and to the office. We had the same problem when reception doors kept being opened up to 10 minutes late, making parents late for work? We kept reporting late opening to the office and eventually it stopped happening.

Fleta Fri 04-Apr-14 19:32:53

Good god. Why can't the teacher allow those that are quiet to go and keep those that are making a noise back...aren't they capable of managing their class?

moldingsunbeams Fri 04-Apr-14 19:33:00

Ohhh really???
Well that was not the reaction I was expecting!

It is driving me nuts, two parents have gone in and got their children in last couple of weeks. I have heard two others complaining.

Its every night and only happens when they have their teacher (they have a sub on the other day and always on time)

Teacher is a very experienced teacher.

At a out of school pta school disco recently she made them all sit down silently before she would dismiss them. This was half nine at night, she made some comment about keeping her waiting and being disrespectful to keep her waiting which I admit did make me hmm

elahrairahforprimeminister Fri 04-Apr-14 19:33:15

Are you in the West Country, OP.

Myself and many parents have had this conversation about DS's class.

Same time lengths, same reason.

Teacher is a bit of a control freak (not judging, I am too) and is also wildly disorganised (ditto).

Bloody annoying though!!

grin

ikeaismylocal Fri 04-Apr-14 19:37:56

YANBU.

What a daft situation!

If you take 15 mins as an average, assume that one parent picks each child up and it is a class of 30 (15x30x5 divided by 60) the teacher is wasting 37.5 hours (!) of the parents time in a week and that doesn't include missed busses. That is a full time job. Shocking!

Fairenuff Fri 04-Apr-14 19:39:03

If this is true, that it is happening every single day and it's 10-20 minutes, just bypass the head and write to governors. And in the meantime go into class to collect the child.

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