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AIBU?

To wish men had breasts.....

49 replies

Writerwannabe83 · 04/04/2014 00:41

....so that when all baby wants to do is cluster feed for hours and hours on end throughout the night, it means the dad's can do their share and let the knackered mothers get some sleep Sad

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Nocomet · 04/04/2014 01:55

No, they'd just want the lovely evening feeding to sleep watching the TV shift.

They still wouldn't notice the baby screaming at 2am

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IAmNotAPrincessIAmAKahleesi · 04/04/2014 01:57

It's so hard isn't it, I hope you manage to get some rest

My DH helped me loads during night feeds, he would pass me the baby and change and settle it so I was awake for as short a time as possible. If I really needed a break he would latch the baby on and help it feed while I slept or feed expressed milk, so you don't have to do it all alone even if you are bf

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complexnumber · 04/04/2014 02:38

I understand that the subject of this thread is meant to be a little light-hearted, but crass generalisations (such as referring to men as 'they') are irritating.

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InAGrump · 04/04/2014 06:17

Yanbu op it's bloody hard!!

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Golferman · 04/04/2014 07:15

Nah, wouldn't work, we would spend all the time playing with them :-D

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Sparklingbrook · 04/04/2014 07:37

I really struggled with that too (years ago now). I used to have a torch so as not to wake DH. Blush

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redshifter · 04/04/2014 07:42

Sorry. But I have to agree with complexnumber

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Sparklingbrook · 04/04/2014 07:44

Well that's not all that helpful when it's a little rant by a tired new Mum is it red / complex?

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wigglylines · 04/04/2014 07:58

Writer, I have a secret to share with you, but first a question.

Why do men have nipples?

Answer? To feed babies.

If a man's nipples (or a woman who's not lactating) are stimulated enough, for example by a baby nursing, they will eventually they will produce milk. Some adoptive mothers manage to breast feed because of this.

So, men could breast feed, it's cultural rather than biological that they don't.

DP was horrified when I jokingly suggested it to him. Grin

It really is outside what society would consider normal. But other than cultural reasons, logically, I can't think of a good reason why not, can you?

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redshifter · 04/04/2014 07:59

It may be helpful.
Sometimes when you are struggling it can help to look at things from a different perspective.

Ie. "I am so glad that I Have breasts so I can feed and comfort my child"

There are men that would love to be able to do that.

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janey1234 · 04/04/2014 08:00

Wriggly - is that true?! Shock

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WhatsTheWordHummingbird · 04/04/2014 08:04

A big perk of FFing Grin

One night a week the moses basket would go rou d dhs side of the bed and id stick my earplugs in. Bliss.

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redshifter · 04/04/2014 08:08

wigglylines - good points

My children used to latch on to my nipples for comfort. It gave my wife a much needed break. The children were happy, I found it fulfilling.

Unfortunately, while our male friends/relatives, just said "cool", It was the females that were uncomfortable with it and said things like "sick", "perverted" and "damaging".

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EverythingsDozy · 04/04/2014 08:43

I don't think men have enough breast tissue to make enough milk to feed a child but I don't dispute that they can produce it.
Men have nipples because we are all the same until the male/female chromosomes kick in when we are in utero. It's the same reason why women have a clitoris, it's the start of a penis.

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Toadinthehole · 04/04/2014 08:50

I read the same in a book by Jared Diamond. Sounds frightful. Also, as a man, having breasts would be pointless as I wouldn't be able to see them very well.

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whatshallwedo · 04/04/2014 08:51

If men were able to breastfeed then I'm sure there would be more support available at the beginning as I can't imagine a man would be willing to tolerate bleeding nipples!

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DontCareAboutYourShoes · 04/04/2014 10:59

Someone should consider making that fake boob from Meet the Fockers.

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rabbitlady · 04/04/2014 11:05

wigglylines speaks the truth.

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TallRedhead · 04/04/2014 11:10

I thought this very thing while bf-ing at 5am this morning and dh snored away beside me Smile

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Loopylouu · 04/04/2014 11:13

Haha I am sitting here feeding my 9 day old dd thinking the same thing.

Although dh is currently cleaning the kitchen, is I think I e got the good deal at the mo, but it is a pain when she's been feeding for two hours from 3am and I look at dh laying there snoring.

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Writerwannabe83 · 04/04/2014 12:15

Thanks for your thoughts everyone! DS has tried to latch on to DH on a few occasions, I will bring up the topic of men producing milk and see how DH reacts Smile

On a few occasions I have looked at my sleeping husband whilst I've been awake for hours with the baby and I often call him nasty names - only silently in my head though. After all, I wouldn't want to wake him up...

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BeverleyMoss · 04/04/2014 12:21

Flowers

It won't always be like this, I'm sure you're doing great.

And the male breastfeeding thing? yes your husband can lactate and successfully breastfeed your baby, but only if you happen to be an indonesian fruit bat, which is unlikely. Don't let that stop you having the chat with DH though Wink

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LadyRabbit · 04/04/2014 12:25

Well they er, can, although I never met one that did in RL!

www.scientificamerican.com/article/strange-but-true-males-can-lactate/

Maybe the Scandis will be the first to pioneer this? One can only hope. (Been up all night with unsettled DS who is 3 and STILL bf'ing. I can't remember life before I was a dairy cow.)

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Writerwannabe83 · 04/04/2014 12:25

I'd be more than happy to trade my husband in for an Indonesian Fruit Bat if it meant I could get a bit more sleep Grin

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littlemslazybones · 04/04/2014 12:29

Hmmm, that's interesting. Maybe I could roll over in the middle of the night and latch ds3 onto dh's nipple to comfort feed?

I wonder how many nights it would take for dh to lactate?

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