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AIBU?

AIBU to not want to see grown adults defecate in the park?

223 replies

ResponsibleAdult · 02/04/2014 20:52

This evening. Lovely mild, light, spring evening, decide to go for a gentle stroll in the park with DD and dogs. See charming young couple walking hand in hand in front of us, no small children, no special needs, no mobility issues. "Ah, loves young dream" I think.

Shortly, the couple separate and walk slowly in different directions. "Ah, going to pose for a softly backlit photo to show their romance blossoming" I think.

Couple remain, separated but squatting in bushes. "Ah a simple game of hide and seek to show spontaneous nature of loves young dream" I naively think .

On approaching, as walking the dogs, I am able to see she has her trousers down and is weeing/pooing in the bushes. Turn back to see squatting shatting boyfriend is now standing and weeing against a tree.

I got the rage.

Me loudest voice with tone of righteous indignation "EXCUSE ME? EXCUSE ME? There is a public toilet 100metres over there" I was ignored, and given a shrug of the shoulders by little Miss Holly Golightly.

So I repeat, my volume rising "EXCUSE ME? There is a public toilet, that is OPEN just over there. I suggest you go and use it as I DONT WANT TO SEE YOUR BARE ARSE!". Point at Golum boy, and repeat same phrase.

Loves young dream ( Golum boy and Golightly) pull up their trousers and shuffle off, muttering "alright! alright" under their breath. Was it a dare, a FB craze, a bizarre fetish, extreme sport dogging???? I don't care.

DD gives me a , I give her a , we carry on our walk.

AIBU???

OP posts:

Report

LaurieFairyCake · 02/04/2014 20:53

It's a sex thing

People are fucking weird

NoArmaniNoPunani · 02/04/2014 20:55

YANBU

What kind of sex thing is it? I've heard of scat fetishists but don't they usually poo on each other?

formerbabe · 02/04/2014 20:55

Noooo! Lauriefairycake... Are you serious?!

ResponsibleAdult · 02/04/2014 20:56

I did wonder, they had to walk past the loo to get into the park, it was a 20 second dash if you were caught short. What is with people???????

OP posts:

ResponsibleAdult · 02/04/2014 20:58

Scatologists and glass coffee tables I had heard of but didn't believe, but to separate off from each other, but be in a completely public place ??

Just why?

OP posts:

DameFanny · 02/04/2014 20:59

Yabu for posting this in AIBU instead of just starting a dirty fuckers thread in chat. [prim]

Sex thing? Really? Thank fuck I'm old and married...

LiberalLibertine · 02/04/2014 21:02

So,Gollum did a shit, then stood up for a wee? Is this normal? ignores fact none of this is fucking normal wouldn't he just wee at the same time?

LaurieFairyCake · 02/04/2014 21:05

Yes they get off on watching each other do it in a park - not the same thrillometer watching at home over the loo. All the better if you can incorporate wanking each other into it or the thrill of getting caught.

At least you stopped them wanking each other while defecating

There's a sentence I never thought I'd have to say

LiberalLibertine · 02/04/2014 21:06

Laurie how go you know all this? (Slightly scared of answer)

LaurieFairyCake · 02/04/2014 21:08

There's a lot of sex stuff in couples counselling

I'm well stocked in brain bleach

Inglori0us · 02/04/2014 21:10

Brain bleach please.

NoArmaniNoPunani · 02/04/2014 21:11

People go to couples counselling and talk about watching each other shit in a park?

ThatBloodyWoman · 02/04/2014 21:13

How on earth can crapping in the bushes be a sex thing?

No,Actually don't tell me....

everlong · 02/04/2014 21:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Binkyridesagain · 02/04/2014 21:13

I'm now wondering how much of the dog shit people complain about is actually human crap.

WTF on getting off on watching your OH take a dump. I'm scared to ask any more but what is the turn on?

newsecretidentity · 02/04/2014 21:15

Well, now. Every day is a school day, isn't it?

newsecretidentity · 02/04/2014 21:17

(In that instance, I do feel it would be acceptable to allow a bouncy dog off lead to go bounding up to them, sniffing their bum and knocking them over with trousers around ankles...)

LaurieFairyCake · 02/04/2014 21:17

Don't google it

There's also folks who meet up to do it - like a niche dogging.

ThatBloodyWoman · 02/04/2014 21:19

Eeeeeewwwww.

LaurieFairyCake · 02/04/2014 21:19

CerealMom · 02/04/2014 21:19

Bloody hell, I've lived a sheltered life.

RomulanBattleBagel · 02/04/2014 21:19

Surely they are just lazy dirty gits who couldn't be arsed to walk to the loo.

It can't be a sex thing. It just CAN'T.

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StealthPolarBear · 02/04/2014 21:20

Did they chuck a roll of charmin between them? Surely they wiped...

BadgersRetreat · 02/04/2014 21:20

sometimes you really are better off not knowing things

MammaTJ · 02/04/2014 21:20

Way to post in AIBU and be told 100% YANBU!

YANBU!

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