To be shocked at neighbour??

[DomesticDisgrace]

I was having a very rare chat with my downstairs neighbour, I'm in a duplex and she's in a flat underneath with her front door under the stairs to my place. Two very separate buildings really and you can hear absolutely nothing from one to the other.
We were talking about ovens and I was saying I'm a pretty useless cook but really been trying this year, something was said about what shelf is best and she said "because heat rises", at this stage DD was getting impatient and I just made a stupid joke about how that'll come in handy for me next winter (given that she lives underneath), not even true because I had my heating on loads this winter and I only said it out of silliness.

Well I've just gotten a text from her saying "Domestic, I've been thinking after our discussion earlier and I'm feeling a little hard done by if I'm honest. Perhaps we could have a chat later on and come up with the fairest way of dealing with the issue regarding heating"

What the actual fuck, I don't know what to say back but I really can't afford to pay her for having her heat on just because heat rises??

[pictish]

Well fgs text back "what issue regarding the heating?"

[MeanwhileHighAboveTheField]

wtf!

[StatisticallyChallenged]

She's a fruitloop. You don't get to charge your neighbours for your heating.

[Cookiepants]

Eh? That's bonkers could she be joking and the tone has been lost in the text?

[TessTackle]

Tell her to do one.
You were joking, and seeing as she knows heat rises that definitely seems like a her problem not a you problem.

My upstairs neighbour has 3 floors to my one and I'm sure I heat her ground floor nicely; such is life!

[Finola1step]

She's trying to pull a fast one.

Text back "Ha, ha you nearly had me there. For a minute I thought you were suggesting that I would be benefitting from your heating! Enjoyed our chat earlier. Domestic"

Then sit back and she if she takes the bait...

[OhNoYouExpedidnt]

That is hilarious! Of course you don't pay her because heat rises. Your heating will be keeping her nice and warm as her heat won't be vanishing into a cold attic!

[pizzachickenhotforyou]

??? Wtf

Tell her to put 10 inches of foam with a layer of fun fur on top on her ceiling and pay for it herself. Or tell her you'll be billing her for the air conditioning in summer.

[Nohootingchickenssleeping]

Sounds mad. I would delete it and deny all knowledge.

[exexpat]

Crazy. Have you ever heard of anyone in a flat contributing to their downstairs' neighbours heating bills?

If she doesn't want you to benefit from her heating, she should insulate her ceiling.

[seanbonbon]

Absolutely crackers!! What a load of crap - honestly she has some nerve.

[pictish]

Please text her back now....I am dying to see what she's going to say!

I think she means to ask you to contribute to her heating bills! Fancy that!

[mistlethrush]

Tell her to get better insulation so that she doesn't lose her heat. Of course you shouldn't pay for any of her heating bills! If you want a 'reasonable' example you could say that people with a terraced property are better off than the end terrace because they don't have an exterior wall on the side. Similarly, she is better off that you are there insulating her from the outside air on top - rather than it being an external surface (roof).

[shoom]

Is she on glue?

What's she like normally? Is she jokey?

I'd probably ignore it or say something along the lines of "I'm not sure what your text meant. Do you want to discuss something?" maybe it was a predictive text error about eating?

[PedantMarina]

Text back either:

Hohoho! Good one. [grin, smiley, etc]

or

headtilt< Been on the gin, dearie?

Keep us posted. This sounds like it's going to be a fun one.

[Cocolepew]

[RoganJosh]

Tell her to turn her heating off if she minds you benefitting from it.

[YellowDinosaur]

What pictish said. Followed by what flicktheswitch said if she comes back that she'd like you to contribute

[WandaDoff]

Heat doesn't rise, hot air rises.

Doubt that is any help to you but I just had a vivid memory of my physics teacher shouting that at me.

Tell her not to be so bloody ridiculous.

[Twitterqueen]

Definitely fruity loopy.

Keep her happy and say you're sure any heat benefits will be offset by the additional insulation you are providing.

[Aventurine]

Bonkers!.

[BreconBeBuggered]

Please text her back immediately. A simple 'Eh?' would suffice.

[PedantMarina]

Oooh, thanks, shtoom! I forgot about "Bitch, are you on glue?"

[fubbsy]

YANBU, just delete the text.

Should I have been charging my upstairs neighbours all these years? Nobody in flats does anything like this. She is bonkers.