To never want to work again

(16 Posts)
brokenhearted55a Tue 18-Mar-14 20:08:47

Just that.

Ive had the living shit bullied out of me at work. Dont feel I can cope now with the job I used to enjoy.

I dont feel able to do my job now.

anyone else felt this way or got over it.

TheGreatHunt Tue 18-Mar-14 20:10:17

Oh no sad is the bullying sorted or ongoing?

Chottie Tue 18-Mar-14 20:11:16

Lots of sympathy from me.

Jellymum1 Tue 18-Mar-14 20:12:23

Yep same...I quit! Feels fab...my last day is 2nd april and I cant wait to stick two fingers up on my way out the door!

Finola1step Tue 18-Mar-14 20:13:39

I think there comes a point of no return. No one can tell you where it is and what it feels like. But you know when it is there.

My sister had a terrible time in her last permanent job. She was bullied out two years ago. She now works for a number if agencies invigilating exams in a load is schools, colleges and her nearest Uni. I've never seen her so happy in her work. She is 44.

It can be done. flowers

brokenhearted55a Tue 18-Mar-14 20:15:32

Bullying kind of sorted. They finally listened to me and had me assessed and the oh dr told them to leave me the fuck alone and they did for a bit. But I can tell it's lingering and prob will start again.
I just cant manage a job I used to be able to do standing on my head.

Latara Tue 18-Mar-14 20:21:50

I don't blame you for feeling that way; maybe it's time to get your CV together and look for a similar job before you lose your self-esteem.

Either way, people can be horrible sometimes, sorry you've had to go through this.

brokenhearted55a Tue 18-Mar-14 20:31:53

I cant find another job

Latara Tue 18-Mar-14 20:37:32

Oh no, maybe go back to occ health dr then and ask their advice.

BobPatSamandIgglePiggle Tue 18-Mar-14 20:39:56

Why can't you find another job?

IWhy can't you find another job?

brokenhearted55a Tue 18-Mar-14 20:45:57

Not much about. Had a few interviews but no luck.

BobPatSamandIgglePiggle Tue 18-Mar-14 21:13:40

Keep trying - something will come up!

Laska42 Tue 18-Mar-14 21:26:54

Yes i got over it but it marked me (in my emotional self) for sometime I think ..
I had an over-promoted boss, who actually didnt know the job , and the bullying was got so bad in the end that I actually walked from the best paid job I ever had. And having always been in a 'safe' public sector role it was very scary , but I did get another job quite soon after and it was the best thing I ever did . Mind you I also coped by being able to move house and area, and I was lucky to be able to do so having my own home and the offer (after 2 months of unemployment) of a good job in a place I wanted to go to .

I also got married just before we moved , but thats because I told my now DH that i was moving away and he could come or not (and he proposed and came with me ! ) ..

It sounds like it all was easy, but actually going through the job crap really focussed my mind on what I wanted from life and after a period of feeling crap. I decided to make a huge change and luckily pulled it off . Yes, i was lucky becuase i had a certain amount of freedom as a single parent,(albeit in a relationship) with a house I could easily sell. and I also was lucky with timing because DS was just about to finish his GCSEs so it was a good time to move afterwards ) .

And now? Well, I now do earn a fair bit less (still in working in the public sector ) But now i thank my bullying boss because i know that without her I would have never lived in the lovely area I do now. (nor possibly would have got married).. So good things can come out of bad.. you just need to take control of what you want from the situation..

I dont know if you are in a position to make major changes in your life as i was, but It took me a couple of months of sitting at home feeling dreadful (I took a month or so of sick leave before i walked) before i even thought that I could try , so it will possibly take you time , but once id made decisions to forget (sod) her and her problems and move on , i came out stronger.

(Its now been 8 years but i still wonder though if id still find it hard not to smack her in the face if i ever saw her )

But now I just mostly i feel sorry for her , because it wasnt me , it was her . I do know from ex collegues who have seem her around that shes still the lonely embittered person she was and that she also got sacked for bullying after she'd done it to a couple more people after I walked. I dont know what she is doing , but Im now very valued in my new job (despite not earning so much , but thats just life in the public sector these days) and also in my my relationship .

She cant know that, as I dont facebook or anything , but its still the best kind of revenge I think) ..

So take time, regroup , focus on what you can do well , forget the person bullying you , because its them who have the problem not you.. and be gentle and patient with yourself.. your self esteem will come back .. (but it might take a little time)

Trust me you'll be ok again ..

And if you are reading , ex manager.. you might recognise yourself (but probably not as you were so stuck up your own .... grin

ilovesooty Tue 18-Mar-14 21:43:06

I was bullied out of my job. I now have a job I love. Hope things get better for you.

littledrummergirl Tue 18-Mar-14 21:56:59

Take a couple of days/week off work seeing a doctor if needed to assess yourself and recover. They will have to cope with your absence as they caused it.
Do you have any evidence of the bullying? If so when you go back, if you are strong enough raise a grievance.
Are you in a position where you can reduce the number of hours you have to be there?
You are getting interviews so you are able to get another job, sometimes when you are in such a stressful situation this affects your outlook and may be impacting on your interviews. It might be worth having a swim or something relaxing before your next one.
I hope you start to feel better soon. flowers

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