Ok, this happened a few days ago and I can't put it out of my mind.
Darling friend was on the phone, having a bit of a moan. She has a DD aged 18 months and was annoyed with her parents, her husband, her nanny, the whole world. I get that those days happen.
I told her she needed to forget about all the crap for the night, sack off the housework and read a good book with a glass of wine. She said that she just couldn't do that. I told her that she needed to make time to relax (she has a demanding job and does a full time week in four days) or she would be no use to anyone.
At this point she said, "But I can't do that now. I've got too much to do. Everything changes when you've got kids". And I (maybe stupidly) pushed the point that having kids doesn't mean you don't need a night to unwind once they are in bed. And she said "You won't get it. You won't get it until you have kids". I ended the convo politely and hung up.
The reason I don't have kids is because I had three miscarriages and a stillbirth in three years. I was devastated after the stillbirth, which was only a few months after her DD was born. I am not trying at the moment, because I need time to recover, and I might never be ready again. She knows all of this.
I get that she was in a bad mood, and I might have wound her up too. I get that it was a slip of the tongue. But I have spent hours with her and her DD, and I have spent hours listening to her moan even though it killed me, because I want to be a good friend and because I know that hiding away from the world of babies won't do anything to help me. The very least she could do was show a bit of consideration for that, or at least call to apologise.
I suspect that I am being unreasonable. But I feel like I was slapped in the face.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
to be so, so upset about what my friend said (and not tell her)
102 replies
dancingwithmyselfandthecat · 12/03/2014 21:30
OP posts:
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.