AIBUs from/about fictional characters

[ProudAS]

I'll start

AIBU to report neighbours to social services

Their 11YO DS appears to be morbidly obese and IMO is getting to look more and more like a pig. I think I saw a curly tail poking out of his trousers.

Their DNephew on the other hand appears malnourished. He's also 11 and has lived with them since he was a baby and his DPs died. I've heard rumours that they lock him in the cupboard under the stairs and make him sleep in there. FFS the house has 4 bedrooms and they only have 1 DC.

It's now getting more suspicious. DNephew hasn't been around for a while and apparently he's away at a school for incurably criminal boys. He's always seemed well behaved to me and I was unaware that such schools existed.

I don't want to poke my nose in but WWYD?

[LesserOfTwoWeevils]

AIBU to burn down the house because DH has taken away my hairbrush, locked me in the attic and is having an EA with the nanny?

[bubblegoose]

WIBU to move to Brazil? I just found out that before we met, my DW slept with another man and had his child. I'm can't forgive her and I'm tempted to get on a boat and move to South America and start a farm or sommat. I am no angel (or am I?) - I also had a dalliance before I married but it's different, I'm a bloke!

[MrsTerryPratchett]

AIBU? I've managed to be a long term student of wizardry for years but not I've got myself mixed up with this weird tourist who keeps paying me more than my advice is worth. I'm ripping him off but he would be mincemeat without me.

[whogrewoutoftheterribletwos]

Aibu to think that if I disown my step mother and choose to live in a polyamirous relationship as a sahp with seven men it's up to me and I don't deserve assasination attempts because of it?

[bebumba]

Whilst travelling home via Paddington Station my family and I found a young brown bear. All he had on him was a battered suitcase and an old hat. We took him home with us, in hindsight this was probably a mistake and we have been doing our best to care for him.
The problem is food. So far we have only been able to get him to eat marmalade sandwiches. AIBU to continue to feed him in this way or do any of you delightful ladies have any knowledge of the dietary needs of small brown bears from Peru?

[TerrariaMum]

AIBU to be concerned about my neighbour and her brother? I'm not sure they haven't bitten off more than they can chew with the little girl they have chosen to take on.

I mean I was worried before when they intended to adopt a boy, but this is worse. The girl has such a temper. I made an innocent remark about her hair colour and she flew at me like a wildcat.

[Burren]

AIBU to be really concerned about not one but two different neighbours? One is a little girl who seems to have been demoted from star pupil to kitchen slavey, now semi-starving in the attic, and the other is a half-dead looking man with a creepy servant who keeps crawling across the rooftops to leave food, bedding and expensive clothes for the girl? Is he grooming her? Should I call SS?

[Marylou62]

I too am worried about my neighbours. They have a beautiful DD but I haven't seen her since her wicked aunt visited. I did see her in the attic window doing some sewing. Now the garden is such a state, with brambles 10ft high. Young men keep trying to break in and then disappearing. What should I do?

[vladthedisorganised]

I love these threads!

I am absolutely furious! I installed a state-of-the-art security system in my garage, where I store my stolen goods valuables. It appears that someone else must have hacked the system as I found the garage empty this morning. My neighbour is acting very oddly and his wife has taken to large and extravagant shopping sprees. WIBU to kill confront him?

[vladthedisorganised]

WIBU to send my housemate to rehab?

That's it really. He complains loudly that he's bored all the time, occasionally has visits from the police and doesn't appear to have a steady job. He does smoke all the time, and will occasionally sit perfectly still for days - unusual, but I don't mind that so much. However, last night I heard gunshots and I suspect there might be more to his chemistry experiments than meets the eye. Not quite sure how to broach the subject with him, which is silly really as I'm a GP myself..

[DeWe]

AIBU about one of the parents at my school. We've moved the school around a few times to get away from her and she persists in buying a house right next door. She thinks she can just walk in to my office, the staff room and even the lessons and disrupt them. She thinks she can solve any problem better the the staff, even though half the time she acts like a naughty middle. I've been head since she was at school (this school!) so have far more experience than her.
She expects to be invited to any event at the school (even when it's just for current pupils) and will just turn up if not invited.
The problem is that she's the owner's sister.
How can I make her give her daughters (her sons go to boarding school, she's not bothered about them) some space and stop interfering in every aspect of school?

[Burren]

DeWe . The divine Joey would fuel a month's worth of AIBUs on her own.

[DeWe]

I have to admit thinking of several

AIBU to think everyone really should have large families like mine (although obviously not quite as big as mine because mine is exceptional) and they all envy mine really...

[meddie]

Aibu to report my neighbour. She has so many children and seems clueless about how to care for them.one of the kids told me all he had for his dinner was broth but no bread and she beats them every night before bed. I think she may have MH issues as dhes taken to living in a shoe...

[vladthedisorganised]

AIBU to think that neighbour's home remedies are frankly dangerous?

DD and her DS went out to play at the local park; both had fairly nasty falls and I immediately took DD to A&E. Fortunately, apart from mild concussion, she seems to be fine. However, neighbour's DS took a much more serious fall and I suspect his skull may be fractured. I went round to see if he was OK and what the hospital had said, but she told me she doesn't believe in hospitals and will treat the injury at home. Surely the poor lad needs an X-ray?

[AlpacaLypse]

vlad, no, don't worry, it's well known that vinegar and brown paper are perfectly effective remedies for a broken crown.

[QueenofallIsee]

AIBU to speak to her father?

Next doors DD came to live with him recently and has taken up with the son of a local doctor. I keep seeing him climbing through her window at night - worryingly, I can also see that he is following her around and limiting her access to her friends. Should I tell her father that she is in an unhealthy relationship?

[ShadowFall]

AIBU to report this to the police?

We live in next to some woods. This morning, I made porridge for breakfast as usual, and as it was such a lovely morning, DH, DS & I decided to go for a quick walk in the woods while our porridge cooled.

I was utterly shocked by what greeted us when we got back home. The door was open, and someone had been helping themselves to the porridge - DS's bowl was completely empty! Not only that, but his chair was in broken pieces on the floor

So we had a look around to see if anything else had been broken or stolen - and there was a little girl asleep in DS's bed! (she'd obviously been jumping about in my bed and DH's bed first as well)

DS had come us, and screamed when he saw someone in his bed, which woke the little girl up. She jumped out of the window (luckily for her, we live in a bungalow) and ran away. We recognised her as a child living locally.

I am absolutely furious DH is a bit concerned that it might cause bad feeling with the neighbours, but AIBU to call the police and report her for this?

[KoalaFace]

AIBU to hate SIL?

DB adores her but I think she's selfish, entitled and she's never bloody satisfied. Plus she's clearly obsessed with her sort of adopted brother.

Although he is a total hunk and wouldn't mind a piece of that action myself!

[NurseyWursey]

AIBU to think my mother should be capable of trying to provide for me and my little sister. Our dad died in the mines and although I know it's hard, she still has us to think about. Poor Prim looks like death. I'm doing my best going out with my arrow getting squirrels and such but it isn't enough, this district is dire.

[wyldchyld]

AIBU? I've been offered a job in a big hotel in the mountains to make sure that everything is okay over the winter. We really need the money and my DS is quite young so it won't interrupt his schooling. My DW seems to not be into the idea but I love it! I'm currently out of work and intend on using the time in the hotel to write a novel. Plus my drinking recently has been a bit out of hand and let's face it, being locked in a hotel for the winter, I won't be able to drink any and go cold turkey. Won't I?

[PoirotsMoustache]

MrsTerryPratchett Rincewind is one of my very favourite characters

[Icimoi]

I've taken a job where I'm employed by a single man to look after a young girlhe describes as his "ward". There's some sort of old retainer who seems very odd - I keep hearing weird noises from the top floor room which is hers, and one night I actually found my employer's bed in flames and helped to put them out, I think she set fire to his bedding, but he insisted he didn't want to tell the police or do anything about it. Another time, when he had guests for dinner, he pretended to be a gypsy and insisted on telling everyone's fortunes. Now he says he wants to marry me.

WIBU just to get the hell out and call SS to look after the little girl?

[BoyFromTheBigBadCity]

Now i know that imaginary friends are fine, and a sign of a healthy imagination, but my DS believes he is friends with a talking group of magic animals who have started a window cleaning service. They have together prevented a very serious burglary of a local notable and so on - wonderful, he is clearly resourceful already! However, a couple of things bother me - said notable has 'cured' and injured pelican with rubber meant for tyres and given my son sole ownership of a sweetshop. Should I report him to SS? the RSPCA? WWYD?

[sheriffofnottingham]

AIBU to report my DHs sister's BFs DD to SS? She lives in a giant shoe and keeps popping out children like nobody's business, I don't think she knows what to do with them all quite frankly. Plus she is definitely committing benefit fraud as recently the front of the house got brand new laces and I for one have never seen her work.